Lil' Fam Takes in Lil' Five For the Day

It is hard to believe that the two little kids in this picture are the same kids I just spent a day with in my favorite part of Atlanta, Little Five Points.


We started off at Children's Healthcare for a rigorous first round of physical therapy for Massey's bum knee. Therapy must be a synonym for "torture." We ended the day in our new favorite store...RAG-O-RAMA. I bought Zach a pair of $65 jeans for $16 and he got five new (vintage) tee shirts to wear with his new uniform pants.



Massey enjoyed the sunglasses collection, they had HUNDREDS of them.

My nephew's girlfriend made the day trip with us...looking at her photo lets you see why Zach is so crazy about her (as we all are.)

No trip would be complete without me making an idiot out of myself. I mean, REALLY...they had about thirty pairs of these shoes I am modeling. Zach just kind of hung back while we made this shot like he really didn't know us but was just watching a middle aged woman make a spectacle of herself.

Here is a picture of my Zach in one of his new uniforms. I'm so used to seeing him in a black tee shirt that it is a joy to see him in a shirt that matches his eyes instead of his demeanor. He's a big fake though. He puts on a tough act but is still the little boy in the first picture and always will be to me.

We had an awesome day. Massey was feeling the effects of her deep tissue massage and therapy ... slept the whole ride home. Zach actually told me thank you for his clothes and said it was a great day. That's a LOT coming from a seventeen year old boy/man.

Spending a day in Lil' Five is like spending a day on another planet. You see things you have never seen and people that are simply entertaining just to watch.

We were walking down past one group of shops when two homeless guys with beards that ZZ Top would envy were sitting with their backs to the building talking to each other and smoking butts of cigarettes. Massey made the comment that when she had been in Little Five two months ago those exact two men were sitting in the exact same spot. I told her of course they were...It was their living room. But if you're homeless , Little Five is better than under the bridge by Turner Field.

We ate at Little Five Pizza. It is exactly the same kind of pizza joint I worked in when I started working for Johnny's Pizza back in 1981. A hole in the wall. When I started with Johnny's they had two stores. One on Cheshire Bridge Road (another hole in the wall) and the one on Virginia Ave. We were next door to the original Starship Enterprise store and our little strip center was like a family. I can still remember all the shops. Johnny's was on the end, in a former Huddle House. Next store was Starship. Next store to that was Washington Printing (never got that name...he was an Asian who's family ran it.) Maybe they used to be in the laundry business and once through with all that 'washing' learned how to run a print press instead of a pants press and just kept the'washing' part as their name. Maybe after "washin a ton" of clothes they changed their vocation but couldn't think up a new name...hence "Washington Printing." Next to them was the locksmith shop and on the end was the tailor shop run by a Cuban woman. We were like our own little five...before Little Five was Little Five!!

I have been lucky enough to survive and enjoy life for almost half a century.

Going to Little Five reminds me of when I was a reckless twenty year old...reminds me of working at Johnny's (now franchised with well over 100 stores) and reminds me what it means to be young , eclectic or just marching to the beat of a different drum or simply searching for yourself.

All I have to say is I am glad "TATS" weren't the rage when I was young and stupid but can see "Laser Removal" being a booming industry in about twenty years.

Who wants to be in a nursing home when your nurse says "Now Mr. Jones, we got to turn you...you're getting a bedsore where that tattoo is that says "FU#@ the System."

Had a great day and have a great family . Days like this are what make memories for a life time.

Til next time...COTTON

A Day Off... With My Kids

Believe it or not I have TWO days off this week. I had yesterday off (You know...the greatest day I've had in months) and I worked tonight. I have tomorrow off and finally got Massey an appointment with the physical therapist at Children's Healthcare in downtown Atlanta for her knee.


I have been so blessed with the government help I have recently received I decided to use that Peachcare plan I have the kids on to finally get her some help for her knee that has been bothering her for months.

The thing about Massey is that she is so dramatic I never know when it's real or just her earning another academy award for "Best Actress in a dramatic role." Her nickname on the Guard is even "Drama" and that pretty much sums her up.

I poo-pooed it for a while but when she came down with strep a couple of months back and Tim took her to the doctor they examined her knee as well and said she needed physical therapy. GO FIGURE...the little stinker was legit with her complaints!

The first time she told me she needed glasses I took her to "Claire's" and bought her some clear glasses just figuring she wanted to have some glasses to look all "Glamorous" and she would be satisfied. When I took her for a sports physical when she wanted to try out for the middle school track team she flunked her eye test and I felt like "Worst Mother of the Year."

You never know with girls...they are either on top of the world or drowning in despair.

The closest place to take her is Atlanta in North Druid Hills...45 miles from home.

I have done a lot for Massey, granted she makes great grades ...is really a sweet girl but with our misfortunes of late I feel I have neglected Zach .

He will NOT allow me to buy clothes for him and would rather go to school buck naked than to wear clothes I pick out for him. He has one pair of cords that he likes and several tee shirts that I bought him two years ago off "InterPunk.com" and a Ramones hoodie that my brother bought him for Christmas last year.

Every morning I say "Zach, get up and put on your uniform...it's time for school."

When he was younger (probably 8, my sister was taking him somewhere in her car when they passed a private school just letting out. He made the comment to my sister as they drove by...'Do they wear the same costumes every day?"

That's what Zach wears every day of the week...his costume and I bet the teachers wonder how poor his parents are that he owns one pair of pants and three tee shirts that all look alike.

So tomorrow we are all headed to Atlanta together.

We will take Massey for knee therapy and Zach for fashion therapy.

Zach is a different kid...DEFINITELY.

He marches to the beat of a different drum...sometimes I even wonder if it IS a drum.

I came home from work tonight and googled thrift stores in Little Five Points in Atlanta. If any one is a " LittleFive" guy, Zach is. He has never been there, but it is place that he will probably see and say to himself "I HAVE FOUND MY TRUE HOME."

You can find some really cheap vintage and classic clothes for a steal. Two bucks for a pair of pants and shirts for fifty cents.

Maybe I'll get REALLY lucky and he will refuse to come back home with me. (TOTALLY KIDDING !)

So Massey will get her much needed therapy and Zach will get some much needed new "Uniforms."

Little Five is an eclectic and funky area that Zach will fall in love with I am sure. My boy needs to have something to smile about and after all I have done for Massey (guard, chorus and even those glasses I fought against) he is due.

Headed off tomorrow for a day with the kids and to enjoy some "ME" time. Isn't it nice that you can consider a day with your teens "ME" time?

An outing and an adventure with the kids...let's see how far I can stretch twenty bucks...I'm guessing pretty far and the reward of being with my kids will be even greater...worth millions!

At least my teens will still go somewhere with me...

Til next time...CURRENTLY COOL COTTON

The Black Hole Seems to Have Light

For the past year I having been sinking...slowly and surely into a black hole.

It started as a mole you might feel was suspicious and need to get checked out.

Then you just think it is nothing and keep on going.

Months down the road the mole turns into a wart that luckily is in a place you can hide from others. A few more months and OMG the wart has hairs growing out of it and you begin to feel disgusted.

Suddenly you feel overwhelmed by the hairy wart but think that if you just keep on hiding it...it may go away.

Finally some low life points out your hairy wart and begins to pluck the hairs out at your own expense...one by one, leaving you with nothing but a wart.

It's still not a good feeling but at least it's just a wart.

Then you find out the wart is not just a wart but a virus that is encompassing your whole life. You feel like you are secure, have had the same job for over 12 years and feel that at least you have that to fall back on.

The next day you wake up and your wart is a land slide blocking you with no other way out.

At first you just lie under the rubble hoping someone will wake you up and tell you it is all a bad dream. Then days later you realize that your worst nightmare has become a reality and you are on your own...literally financially and emotionally.

That is when true friendship and the love of God comes into play.

You've always been a decent person and always helped others...suddenly your true friends show their true colors and WHAM... lift you up with prayers , e mails calls and monetary help.

They send you gifts... they feed your family and take care of your kids.

Yes it is humiliating in the beginning but welcomed in the end.

I still had a job and was keeping our heads above water.

Then the black hole sweeps in and you are lost. The job you had dissolves. All the work you have done for the past 12 years is nothing and you are left with a gape of wonder and a sense of "What the hell happened."

Then your family and your friends kick into overdrive...keeping not only you but your family afloat.

It doesn't pay your mortgage but allows your family to survive and concentrate on MAKING that mortgage.

I got a new job...a job that I love and a job that loves me.

Until today I did not know that in actuality we were close to being three months behind on our mortgage. My husband talks to the lenders on our mortgage...I don't need any added stress. He told me he was sorry that he had told me and didn't mean to add to my burden.

The thing is...we are a team. He has been overwhelmed as I have by all the gifts that people have sent us...but losing a $700 a week job has set us back even further and I had no idea til today that we were that close to losing the house that is over our heads.

The bank was in the process of trying to debit the monthly payment from my account...for the third time and after failing twice had nothing to show but the two $37 charges for returning the check .

I went to my new job to pick up my paycheck...the one for training and probably the last check I would get...most servers never get a paycheck because taxes are taken out of their tips and the tips are what you live off .

I had a $251.oo check and drove straight to the bank to deposit it along with the money I made last night.

I had to go by and pay Charter because we were late with their payment and my Internet wasn't working.

Came home and got online to check my bank balance and there it was!!

Unemployment had finally been approved and paid me for the last two weeks...one deposit of $330 and another or $285. With my paycheck the house note cleared and now we are only two months behind.

Baby steps...a little at a time. One foot in front of the other.

When I went to the mailbox...a task I dread lately...I had an debit card from DFACS for food stamps...over $500 for food for my family and the sweetest thing I have had happen in a while. Now I can put all of my tips toward paying bills and the mortgage.

Granted we are still behind but now they know we are making the effort and hopefully we will keep the house.

Without the help of so many we wouldn't have been able to make a house note clear...without the help of so many we wouldn't be in our house at all.

I went and bought groceries...LOTS of groceries and took my coupons with me. I had $40 worth of coupons and if I didn't have to buy dog food would have walked out without spending a dime. My dogs have been downgraded to Kibbles and Bits, but didn't seem to mind. There was a short time that I thought my kids may be eating Kibbles and Bits so it worked out really well.

I know God is never late to answer prayers but he sure can keep you in suspense...

Thanking God, my all my friends and family and a new job for letting me feel like that hairy wart is finally going away. When you're 50...a hairy wart doesn't help.

Getting up in the morning to start paying forward...look out people I intend to make all your love not only justified but well deserved.

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!

TIL NEXT TIME... Cotton with a black hole behind her and a hairy wart fading fast

Server Overboard !!

I just walked in the door from work. Dang, it's a good feeling!

Paid forward some of the many acts of kindness I have been shown and cut my elderly neighbor's yard before work. You know, Mr. (slow)Lee. As usual he stood with his arms crossed over the bed of his huge diesel truck and chain smoked while he watched me cut his front and back yard. I'm not sure why he watches me but he seems to enjoy it so I just wave to him every few turns. I'm not much to look at but I do have a better figure than Mrs (slow)Lee but of course it is hard to see what kind of figure you have in those flowered smock house dresses that women over 80 seem to have a closet full of.

I guess when you're retired there's plenty of time for everything...including watch your neighbor cut the grass. I think he's just waiting for July when I wear my Sofee shorts and a bathing suit top. He's obviously an "A" cup man!!

My cousin's husband came over earlier this morning to service my A/C unit. He gave me a GREAT deal on the freon that has to be replaced every summer and even offered to do it for free. I finally talked him into taking $40 and still got the better end of the deal. One year when I had a Heating and Air guy come out they charged me $250. Our house is a tri level with only one unit ...a 14 year old unit and all the bedrooms are on the third floor. It makes the one unit have to work really well to cool the whole house but a shot of freon once a year does the trick.

Tim got sent for a drug screen for a new job and we are hoping that he starts this week. A drug test is usually a good sign and we are hoping that is the case with this one. He had an interview to be the guy wearing the statue of liberty suit outside of Liberty Tax service but it fell through (Totally kidding!)

Went to work at 5:30 and was disappointed it seemed slow.

Not to worry!

I had only waited on two tables by 7:00 when I got a ten top of women celebrating a birthday...ALL WAITRESSES !!

It was the first big table I had gotten by myself and with LOTS of help from the bartender...a super nice guy, I made it through my first big party . All the girls were from Longhorn. Not the one I worked for but I knew about half of them.

Of course they had heard about my dilemma.

I told one of the girls the same thing I told another former co worker today on Facebook... I should have jumped ship a long time ago but didn't really appreciate being thrown overboard. Thank the Lord I knew how to tread water!

They tipped me $75 letting me walk out of the restaurant making $90 on just three tables. GOD BLESS THE SERVER...THEY TAKE CARE OF THEIR OWN !!

Came home all smiles until I walked in the kitchen and saw that Massey had been cooking. In her words...OMG...WTF...(That's 'fudge') I was not LOL and most certainly not ROTFL. I don't feel like she is my BFFL right now. That girl is a walking train wreck. Every pan she used is still in the sink, her burned cookies are still on the stove stuck to the cookie sheet and the trail of crumbs tells me every step she took.

The kitchen will look exactly the same when she gets up for school.

All in all a great day.

The mortgage check still didn't clear but maybe the third time will be the charm! But we're getting closer and closer every day and you know what?? The stinking banks are one of the biggest reasons for the crappy economy and who exactly do they think wants to buy my house besides us? Tim gets paid this Thursday, is it gonna KILL them to wait 72 hours for a payment on a house that is almost paid for anyway? The Clark Howard side of me says it's not. It may not boost our credit rating but credit rating is way down my list of priorities right now.

In the words of ole Willie Nelson we are "On the road again."

I absolutely love my new job and will never work for a big corporation again. The sense of peace I have when I walk in the door is still there when I walk out and the money is more than I would have made being a newbie at my old job.

My new boss is a dead ringer for Mike Meyers as 'Dr. Evil" without the scar but I haven't seen him put his pinkie to his mouth yet and he has been very nice and patient with me...teaching me a lot about Italian food and teaching me how to stay away from an Italian when he is mad. His wife is a wine snob who has taught me a lot about wines and how to stay away from the wife of an Italian when she is mad.

It's a family ... a quirky family but a hard working, nose to the grindstone family who both work seven days a week and have welcomed me with open arms. Of course when they are hugging me they may be shaking their fist at someone behind my back but if I continue to work hard I'll be just fine.

It's been a long time since I have been happy at work...it is a tremendous relief to be somewhere I am wanted and somewhere I want to be.

Til next time...Signora Cotton

Back Home, Snug in Her Bed

My girl is back home, snug in her bed, visions of World Championships dancing in her head.

Back from Ohio, worn out but ecstatic...bubbling when she got into my car and didn't stop talking until she crashed into her bed.

Thanks to another guard mom for all these pictures...they tell the story of a long road for these young adults and what it means to have perseverance and dedication.

The competition was in Dayton, Ohio and was the World Championships. There were teams from Australia and even Japan.

Our team came in 20th...a pretty remarkable feat for this group of kids. Led by their fearless leader who pushed them long and hard all season, it paid off. Just to look at these pictures and see the smiles on their faces and looks of determination warms my heart.

I love the picture of the saber being spun high in the air and the ending of their show with the guard in a close circle with the confetti being thrown into the air.

Massey was talking 90 MPH to Tim and me in the kitchen as he got ready for work and I packed his lunch. She said "I even got Aunt Cindy something for her birthday." She pulled out a round yellow pin that says "GUARD AUNT."

I thought that was so sweet and was thrilled she didn't pull out another one that said "GUARD MOM GONE WILD."

After having two boys that just wanted to 'Get out of school' as quickly as possible, it is nice to have a kid that is taking advantage of every opportunity she has to savor and enjoy her time there, and make the most of just being a teenager.

I absolutely hated missing this trip, but it just wasn't possible to go. Instead I stayed here and worked...made great money and still got texting from her on an almost hourly basis and spoke with her every night when I got home from work.

The picture of them all dressed up is from the luncheon banquet. Massey said she didn't expect to... but cried at the banquet. This team is a tight one and the love running between them all is even tighter.

They all had matching practice suits (with their names on the back) compliments of two of the guard parents, matching bandannas they all wore and just had an all round wonderful experience and created memories that these kids will think about years from now.

The last picture is of the guard in their circle before warm up (I think)...Massey is the one shoving food in her mouth, but the way they huddle together and they way they bond not only makes me proud but makes me smile .

My girl is home again.

She had many 'Guardian Angels' (BIG pun intended) watching out for her on this trip, that it made the separation so much easier and I have several Thank You notes to write.

So her season is over...I can honestly say I am sad to see it end. What a great organization and great school...but HEY at least she is just a Freshman!!

The picture above is the saber spin and one of my faves. The guy to the left is the hard nosed leader that makes them the champs they are.

This picture is the finsh of their program and brought tears to my eyes...they just LOOK like they are celebrating, don't they?

Yes, I guess I am "GUARD MOM GONE WILD."

As always, click on the pics...

Time For the "DAYUNCE"

I went into work tonight to see girls in prom dresses being led to one of my tables.

ALERT...DANGER...WARNING !!!

No server likes prom night. It's amateur night...people that would normally never go out to a nice restaurant but have been forced (by Mother's Day or prom) to spend money on a fancy meal when they would rather be cooking a frozen pizza or eating microwave popcorn.

The two young girls sat down at my table...perfect hair, manis and pedis freshly done and hair do's that set their parents back as much as the meal was going to cost. I went to greet them and told them they looked beautiful (which as 16 year old girls they already knew) and took their drink orders.

When I came back with their sweet tea I asked what prom they were going to? They replied with such a southern drawl that it made me sound like a Southie from Boston. They were from about an hour south of Newnan...a small town (and it showed, bless their hearts.)

I asked if they wanted to start out with something and OF COURSE they said "Just some of that bread y'all bring." The table was set for four and I asked if they were waiting on other girls or dates?

One of the girls replied that it was their dates and the other girl said "They gone to get diesel." I kept a straight face and made it away from the table without cracking up. "Gone to get diesel"...I think I would have just said they were at the gas station.

I immediately pictured them pumping diesel into a monster 4x4 trying not to spill it on their pants.

The boys arrived shortly thereafter and I began to take their order. The first girl pointed to the "Adriatica'...scallops, shrimp and Maryland blue crab meat cooked with lobster broth, sherry and marinara sauce served over pasta (excellent choice) but she ordered it this way: "I ain't got no clue how to say it but this is what I want."

On to the first young man...he ordered Chicken Alfredo. I asked him what type pasta he wanted and he said "I guess them noodles like they have at Olive Garden." I replied "Let's give your the fettuccine."

They were really sweet kids and I wish I could tell you how long one of the boys took figuring out the tip on his phone/ calculator. At least he put in 15% and that's what I got. The other guy was cheaper, probably saving money for some Sloe Gin later on if they could find someone to buy it.

The night picked up. Although it was slow I sold three bottles of wine ($120.00) to two tables and made a $20 tip on a $70 tab and made a $44 tip on a $242 tab. In my 12 years at Longhorn I NEVER sold three bottles of wine in one night.

This is the place I needed to be years ago. A place where the food is fresh, custom made...specials every night of the week and owners and staff that are like one big family. MY FAMILY now!

How about these for specials?

Steel head Trout: Fresh steel head trout lightly dredged in corn flour and pan fried in olive oil. Served with lemon tarragon aioli, smashed red bliss potatoes and asparagus with chili vinegar.

Or...Roasted Pork Tenderloin: spice rubbed pork tenderloin, roasted and served with fennel, caramelized onions, sauteed apples, walnuts and an anisette and brown sauce. Served with roasted red bliss potatoes.

Or even my daughter's favorite... Parmesan Encrusted Tilapia: Fresh Tilapia topped with herbs and Parmesan then baked with diced Roma tomatoes, lobster broth and cream sherry. Served over spinach.

Just one more...

Zach's favorite... Seafood Crepes: Crepes filled with shrimp, scallops and salmon in a sherry lobster cream sauce. Served with deep fried green beans.

I have found a new home and a job that doesn't FEEL like a job. Life is looking up, and so am I every time I thank The Lord for taking care of me and leading me once again in the right direction.

Til next time...Contented COTTON

Simply Sisters

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY SISTER!!

She is my best friend. She stepped in when my mother died and raised me to be the woman I am today (I hope I have lived up to her standards.)

She will probably want to kill me for a lot of these pictures, but who WAS cute in elementary school? I can guarantee that my mother sewed most of the outfits we are all wearing as kids...she was a "Demon" with a Singer sewing machine.

My brother stepped in as my Dad as I have grown older but my sister has been my best friend, mentor and saving salvation as I have traveled the road of life and steered me in the right direction numerous times...she is my personal GPS.

So she started out cute as a button in the baby picture...curly pig tails and all. Once her permanent front teeth came in it was a whole different story!

At least my parents had the sense (and cents) to send her straight to the orthodontist once those "Chompers" grew in. I was always a gawky ugly sort but at least I couldn't eat corn on the cob through a picket fence!


Once those braces came off she was a true beauty...still is.

She was a high school teacher out of college, taught my college room mate in high school... introduced us and gave me another life long friend.

She left teaching to become a flight attendant with Delta...for thirty plus years, and retired to follow her calling as a "Professional Volunteer."

An avid Braves fan, an excellent painter (rooms not canvases) and a friend to every person she has ever met...her heart has no depth.

She volunteers at a Thrift store and is one of the greatest things to ever happen to her church, volunteering so much her tithe ought to be cut in half.

She helps out her two boys (who are really men, but when they are your kids they will ALWAYS be kids.)

She is a dog lover, just like me...has a boxer but has lost several over the years. She even has a "Hell cat" that I can't for the life of me understand why she loves so dearly. But that's my sister.

Full of love and good grace.

Full of compassion for others (including me) and would take the entire world under her (left) wing if her arm pit was big enough.

The things she has done for me and the immense love I feel for her simply cannot be put into words, but don't need to . They are a feeling, an emotion and a sense that is indescribable but felt in the heart , soul and mind.

My mother left this world when I was 17, my father when I was 42.

They knew what they were doing when they left me in the hands and heart of my sister and brother.

Life has finally sent me a few bumps and ruts in the road. My siblings have been my paving crew. They have not only paved the way but given me the gift of love, support and the chance for some breathing room while I take a breath , plunge ahead and move on to survive.

Hopefully you will click on all the pics because even though she was geeky and buck toothed in her adolescence...she has turned into one of the most beautiful women I have ever known and feel ridiculously lucky to have her as a sister.

Happy birthday, Cin.

Know that I love you and that you have made a difference in literally hundreds of lives...if not thousands.

Thank you for giving me the honor of calling you my "Sis."

Happy Birthday, wishing you many, many more!

Til next time, COTTON

Homely and Lonely...That's ME!

Geez, it's been 15 hours since my girl abandoned me for Ohio and I'm already missing her. I thought it would make me feel better to upload some of my favorite pictures of her. Most of them are from her early youth and one is my favorite guard picture of the girl's reciting The Lord's Prayer before a competition earlier this season.


How do kids grow up so quickly and kill us so slowly?



It's ALWAYS something with your kids; The girls AND the boys. Granted the girls are always more dramatic and intense and the boys are much easier to please...but I love them all and couldn't imagine my life without them.

Massey left this morning...they were to meet at the school @ 6:30 and Massey was riding with a girl on guard who has her license so I wouldn't have to take her. Massey is an early riser so I knew I wouldn't have to wake her up. I set my alarm for 6:10 so I could see her off. I woke up and called to her but she didn't answer. I figured she was probably downstairs on the computer or in the kitchen eating breakfast. I wandered downstairs to find an empty kitchen and no one on the computer. I went back upstairs and saw she hadn't taken her pillow so thought she might be out in the driveway waiting on her friend.

I got her pillow and a blanket for her to use on the bus and went out in our driveway to find it dark and empty.

My heart dropped. How could she leave without even waking me up to say good bye? I immediately got dressed and threw her pillow and blanket in the car and zipped off to the school. I sent her a text "Where R U?" She sent one right back "I am on my way to OHIO!!!"

The thought of her leaving for Ohio without me being able to hold that sweet round face between my hands and sink my fingers into that mass of curls while I kissed her good bye and told her I loved her gave me a sickening feeling.

I arrived at the school and there were about 5 guard girls standing around their cars in the pre dawn light. I got out of my car and asked if Massey was there and they said "No."

Panic began to sink in and my "Parent Paranoia" took over. Zach says I am the most paranoid mom he has ever met (lucky boy in my book.)

I immediately started thinking "What if something happened to her OR me while she was gone and I hadn't had that last look into her clear blue eyes and told her face to face how much I loved her?" ...Maybe Zach IS right, but I don't care!

The little stinker had left early to go to McDonalds with her friend and wasn't even to the school yet. I sent her a text telling her I was at the school and she text back "Be Right there."

WHEW!!! I hadn't missed her after all.

The car came rolling into the school parking lot and Massey came bouncing over to the car. I asked her why she left without waking me up and she said she was going to but Jill got there early and was already in the driveway so she had to leave.

I asked her if she had her pillow , she rolled her baby blues and said she had left it on her bed.

BAM! Mama had the pillow AND a blanket in the car to make that 9 hour drive comfy and warm. I have to hand it to myself, I know how to make kids feel guilty and make myself look like a hero all in one fell swoop.

She was so excited about this trip and teens have no concept of the meaning of paranoia or concern...they are all invincible and live strictly "In the moment."

I told her she couldn't leave me without a hug and kiss for luck and she sweetly apologized ; I got out of the car and we held each other tightly and I breathed in the wonderful smell of my little girl who is quickly...too quickly becoming a woman and making her way into young adulthood.

What a feeling of relief to see her, hold her and give her a kiss as she starts this first big journey of her life. I know there are many journeys trips and adventures in store for her and I want to kiss her goodbye at the start of every single one and be the first person she smiles at and hugs tightly when she returns.

HEY!! She owes me that much and as a mother...that is all I need.

I drove back home with a feeling of serenity and a sense that "All will be okay now."

My paranoia went away, I worked a double shift with no worries or regrets , knowing that she is having the time of her life and MY eyes were the last ones that held hers in a look that says ...

"I LOVE YOU"

Dang being a parent is tough...Thank the Lord the rewards are so sweet.

Til next time... Constantly Cautious Cotton (or as Zach says...Just a Freak)



P.S. As always, click on photos to view in original size...she's even cuter close up!

More God Bubbles...

That's me in the middle and all my problems trying to crash the party.

The thing is, I am so surrounded by love and care that it makes it difficult NOT to smile. Massey and one of her best friends have a "God Bubble" theory (see past post). When you surround yourself with God you are in a God Bubble. When you do for others that Bubble grows bigger to encompass them as well. As you love more, the bubble continues to grow.

My family is currently floating like a HUGE God Bubble and there is no better place to be.

I got a lot done today before I went to work.

Made the rounds, Dept. of Labor...I'm not sure they understand the significance of needing unemployment insurance. I filed over two weeks ago and have yet to receive a payment. The lady told me it was still in the process stage and to wait another week and come back if I hadn't received a check. At least it hasn't been denied so I guess I may still get some help.

Next was DFACS...another office that I wait in line semi patiently to speak as quietly as I can to the clerk. Not that it should really matter, we're all there for the same reason. They needed "One more pay stub" and I finally found it on Saturday when I cleaned out the garage. I never saved my pay stubs because I never actually got a check. Not knowing my crappy manager was going to fire me I had thrown it in a trash can in the garage. Once DFACS needed it I was almost sure it was long gone but my God Bubble had left it for me to find and now THINK I have turned in all the paper work I need to get assistance.

Next to the post office to mail off the kid's insurance payment since it needs to be there "Yesterday." Massey was with me and once again the government kept up it's snail slow movement and it seemed to take forever to hear "Next in line."

There was an old codger behind us who turned around in line to strike up a conversation with the guy behind him.

I swear he sounded like he had a microphone in his hand. I didn't turn around to look, like the two women in front of me did. The stare Massey gave me inclined me to just stare straight ahead as I cracked up at what I was hearing.

First off, Mr. Microphone talked VERY loudly about how a stamp used to cost three cents and what are they doing with all that money anyway? Then he commented on the back room you could see."Lookit all them buggies filled with mail , how they know where its all supposed to go?...it's a wonder my mail don't end up in China." He veered off into a one man conversation about a hotel that burned down in downtown Atlanta...Winecoff or something like (it IS Winecoff...my cousin told me via email, Thanks, Neal) that and immediately started another thread of conversation about how his buddy could surely shoot some pool...never seen the likes of a man that could clear a table like he did.

I finally HAD to turn around, (with Massey GLARING at my back) and saw that this ole codger was speaking to a young Asian man that appeared to not understand one word that this old gentleman was saying but had a very pleasant look on his face which obviously encouraged the older man.

The older man's voice never got quieter or stopped...every person in that line (now 15 deep) was listening to this man and probably thinking the same thing I was...His wife probably sends him out on errands just to give her own ears a rest.

It was the highlight of my morning! I LOVE senior citizens, especially ones like this man. He is in his late eighties, no one has taken his driver's license away and "Dadgummit" he'll talk to whoever he wants to, whether they talk back or not! Massey commented on him having on old jeans and holes in the back of his shirt. I thought to myself he probably told his wife (at length) how he needed to change before he went out because you never know who you might run into or see or what could happen. She probably said "YOU LOOK FINE..just go on and get."

Then it was time to take Massey to practice and go home to get ready for work.

I had my very first busy night!!! I was so proud of myself. I faked what I didn't know, only had five tables and walked out with seventy dollars.

Came home from work to find one of my friends had stocked my cabinets and refrigerator with all kinds of groceries. They not only bring Massey home from practice for me...they bring home food to feed my family.

My God Bubble is BURSTING!!

I am back on the path but still have friends helping me make the climb much easier.

The smiles surely outweigh the frowns.

I am one lucky woman.

Til next time... ONE HAPPY COTTON

He is Risen and I'm on the Rise

These pictures are from our Easter dinner at my sister's house. I had to work today (a good thing) and Tim had to work tonight (another good thing) so we all met this afternoon after I got off at my sister's old farm house to enjoy a beautiful day of sunshine and celebration of not only Easter's true meaning but the true meaning of family.


My family has dwindled down to me, my sister and my brother. Of course my sister is married with kids , I am married with kids but both of our parents are gone and our last grandparents have been gone since I was in my early twenties, the first set gone before I was born.

My brother is a bachelor...thank goodness! He spends all his money on me and my sister and our brood of kids. He is hands down their "Favorite" uncle and our favorite brother!

He told us today at dinner that he was being transferred back to Orlando. God bless him, he has to get away from us because he has helped us out so much I am surprised he doesn't use call blocking on our phone numbers. I asked him today if that was Orlando, Yemen he was transferring to? Didn't get a straight answer but I am pretty sure it is the Orlando in Florida.

My nephews were there, with their sweeties and my one nephew's sweetie brought her daughter(seen in the photos.) A precocious girl who at the age of six is a tiny adult with the heart of a child. She fit right in with our eclectic family and seemed to have a ball.

Our family is an unpretentious one, accepting and loving and always welcoming. Yes we are Liberals and proud of it. We don't beat our beliefs into other people...they are our beliefs, every one should have their own.

The day was filled with kiddie fun for Ava, and wonderful food and drink for all. I am so blessed to have such a loving family and would be six feet under by now without them.

Work is getting easier and I am feeling my confidence coming back to me as a server. I have been stressed out like I was performing brain surgery instead of serving a meal on a dish. I know it will take a while to dig out of the hole we have gotten in but at least now I have a shovel.

Between family, friends and my shovel I know now that we will be okay...eventually.

For most people Facebook is a social network, for me it has been a salvation. Friends have written me, encouraged and supported me ..emotionally mentally and financially. Without my FB friends I really don't think I would have made it this far...literally.

Besides being grateful first for God and his Son this Easter, I am grateful for more. On top of having a Saviour that gave his life for me I have friends, family and even strangers that have kept my family afloat and given me the will to keep going in the face of overwhelming adversity.

The top picture is me with my nephew "Apolo Ohno." I could have posted a picture of me with my other nephew but when you can pose with "Apolo" or the guy from "Napoleon Dynamite" I think that one's a given. Granted my other nephew is handsome as well but when he wears his glasses he DOES resemble ole "Napoleon."

The other pics are of me and my girl, Massey and one is of my sister with Massey and Ava. The other is a photo of my 17 year old looking like the teen age son in "Little Miss Sunshine." (Great movie...a must see)

Click on them all to see them up close...that is how I feel about my family in a nut shell..."UP CLOSE."

Til next time , hoping you all had a blessed and happy Easter... COTTON TAIL

Advantages of a Family Owned Business

Needless to say this isn't a photo of the actual family I work for but you get the picture (small pun intended.)

It was my third night on my own. Thank the Lord is wasn't overly busy, I'm not ready to get blown away yet and the two table section I am running gives me enough time to try and learn the new system. I made a couple of goofs with the way I rang in orders but for the most part did okay. The problem is that I don't feel like a seasoned waitress starting in a new place, I feel like a new server starting in my FIRST restaurant.

Every one is tremendously helpful and nice. Tonight one of the specials was " Shrimp Madagascar" shrimp baked in a sauce of cream, green peppercorns, Pernod and green onions. Served with a side of risotto cakes.

Number one I had to ask what Pernod was (a French Anise flavored Liqueur) never heard of green peppercorns and I have never had risotto in my life. The owner went to the back and cooked me a dish of risotto that was AMAZING! Whereas rice is usually cooked with a lid on top, risotto... similar to rice is cooked with the lid off and absorbs all the liquid. With this special it was formed into cakes, fried and was delicious.

Number two another special was "Herb Encrusted Corvina." Fresh hand cut Corvina topped with a herb crust and baked in a brown butter sauce served with grilled Spring vegetables tossed in a basil garlic olive oil. My first question was "What the heck is Corvina?" Now I know it is a mild white fish from the Pacific caught off the coast of Mexico and the grilled vegetables were asparagus, yellow bell pepper, red bell pepper, zucchini, squash and red onion.

It's learning a different menu every night of the week. Like I don't have enough to learn...every server has to learn specials every night of the week, but that is part of what makes this an amazing restaurant.

I know I am worrying too much...it shows on my face. Tonight the bartender came in the kitchen and asked who I was mad at. Gotta keep that "Mom is mad" look off my face!

The support the owners give the employees is a whole new world to this former "Corporate" girl. Once I get used to everything and feel more comfortable I know that I will be so glad to have this new job. The tips I have made are far above the average I made at the old place and if we can hang in there til I start making some dough...we should be okay.

Happy Easter to every one and please continue to pray for me and my family.

Til next time... COTTON

Deere John, Glad You're Back in Action

The third picture is of my neighbor's yard that I cut for the older couple that live there. Mr. (slow) Lee and his wife Claudette. He's a chain smoker who starts drinking Budweiser's around 9AM. Ahh... the retired life!

The other shots are of my back and front yard. My front yard was easy to cut, the back yard was like mowing crop circles in a rice field. With all the rain and three dogs fertilizing it daily it was almost a foot high in some places . I had to start with the blade on the highest level and gradually get it down short enough to see the bulldog when he goes to the back of the yard.

I'm pretty anal about my yard work. It's not complete until I cut it, mulch all the trimmings and edge it out totally with my good friend "Mr. Weed Eater." Being the first cut this Spring, the weed eater just about did me in. When I got through my hands were shaking worse than Mr (slow)Lee's before his 9AM Bud.

Nothing makes me feel better than to turn in the drive with a freshly mowed yard and it be all trimmed and neat...that means all driveways and walkways swept as well.

Tomorrow starts the hard part...weeding my flower beds by hand. No 'Round Up' for me, just some good old exercise for my legs and arms, getting rid of all those dandelions and weeds and making me even happier when I pull into my driveway when retuning home.

I wish I cared about housework the way I do about yard work. My house isn't a pig sty (that would be Massey's room) but I'm not a freak about a little dust or some dog hair on the carpet. My yard is another thing all together. At least my neighbors drive by and probably say "I bet her house is neat as a pin on the inside!" That being said, I keep my front door locked at all times and the garage door shut. At least the part THEY see is nice and neat. I keep the kitchen clean and faithfully scrub the toilets but don't really sweat the rest. I'm a LEO...a sun lover and a southern girl who loves the heat of Summer.

On Saturday I will head up to the front of the subdivision to mow and weed eat the entrance to our neighborhood. I did it for free for about a year before my sister told me to call the president of our homeowners "ASS"ociation. They pay me $40 a month now to keep it neat and trim and all trash picked up thrown out car windows as they fly by our street. There is more weed eating than actual mowing since there are two deep gulley's on either side of the street but I don't mind at all. Once I get started on yard work I can do it for five hours without blinking and the time flies by.

I come home covered with grass from the weed eater and blisters on my hands but I sleep like a baby after a day doing yard work. I wish I had a trailer where I could load up my honey, "John Deere" and go cut other people's yards. Last year I did go cut a friend's yard about a quarter of a mile away. I just gassed up my John Deere and putted down the road with cars whizzing by me going 50 MPH. My husband just shook his head when I told him I was going on a "Road Trip."

I've gotta remember sunscreen tomorrow. I got through today exactly one hour before work and when I jumped in the hot shower I thought I would cry like a baby...actually I think I did!

The kids came home from school and just bragged about how good the yards looked and Zach went out back to lay in the hammock for a while just because it looked so "Inviting."

I am so glad Spring has finally Sprung.

Til next time... Mrs. "John Deere"

PS Be sure to click on the pictures so you can see my handiwork up close (I'm a proud Mower)