Old Man Winter Keeps Coming Back Like a Bad Zit

For Pete's sake, it's March 6 and cold as the leader of North Korea outside. Even my dogs think it's too cold. They go straight out, do their "Do" and come right back to the kitchen door to be let back inside, and THEY'RE wearing head to tail fur coats!

Ran my errands early and got back to the house by eleven this morning. It's been so crazy here this winter. Mid seventies one day and snow and ice the next. It's like I needed to wear flip flops on my feet inside of my snow boots. Suffering from hot flashes doesn't help much either. My little body is confused as to what season it really is, and so am I!

Unless they have large parties scheduled at work I've been getting two days off a week and has done wonders for my housekeeping skills. Heck, we can even let people in through the front door now! My sister has redone my entire kitchen from the baseboards to the ceiling and has really gotten me motivated to clean the rest of the Cotton compound. I'm sure all the Lost Boys noticed the kitchen (it would be hard not to) but none of them notice things like clean baseboards, clean ceiling fan blades, cob webs down from every corner and wall and light fixtures taken apart and cleaned, not to mention sparkling showers and more often than not, missed urination targets (better known as toilets to women.)

No worries, I point out every little thing I've done every time one of them comes home. Like good semi freeloaders, they act really impressed but would be just as content with dirty baseboards, fans, ceilings and urination targets. At least it makes ME  feel better and can now open our front door when somebody unexpectedly drops by. Before, I'd hide as if it were Hari Krishna's ringing our broken doorbell that only "Clonks" when you push it and just let my three barking mutts scare them away .

Tim has been telling me for two weeks all I needed to do to fix my ailing back was to stretch every morning and every night. I'm not used to him being right (in MY mind) but after a week of twenty four / seven constant pain finally listened.

When Jane Fonda's workout first came out in the eighties I borrowed the album (yes an actual vinyl record) from a friend.
She had lost the booklet with pictures but  faked what I didn't understand. I finally bought the VHS tape ( an antique cousin of the even more antique eight track tape) and discovered the step I thought was "pulling knees" was actually "pulling weeds" and made much more sense. The first twenty minutes are all stretching exercises and still remember them...in order. (just ask my sister, I have an excellent memory.) That's why she sits next to me at funerals, so I can tell her who is walking up to say hello to us after forty years.

I've been stretching at least four times a day the past few and it's like my body has experienced nothing short of a miracle.

It clears my sinuses,  makes my neck pain crack, crackle and disappear, loosens my always stiff lower back and simply makes me feel pain free.

Talk about a cheap fix!

I now call Tim , Dr. Cotton and bonus is I'm sleeping with my doctor so there's not even a co-pay required!

After work out number two today, my older son had a meeting at work. My younger son works there too but was off and offered to take me to lunch while TJ had his meeting. Neither currently has a vehicle but who am I to talk? I don't own one either. I'd much rather them save their money to move on and out so took them up there in MY borrowed car. I'm hoping we've kept it so long my sister and her husband will forget they own it.

Zach treated me to an awesome lunch while TJ attended his meeting. Had an awesome Angus burger with homemade pimento cheese, bacon jam, lettuce, tomato and onion. The home made fries tasted just like The Varsity's and anyone from Atlanta will know what I'm talking about.

 He even bought us dessert, homemade
pecan bar (kinda like pie) with vanilla ice cream.

We got home around four and made a vow not to walk outside again until I work tomorrow at three. I washed sheets and comforters, played on Facebook, did some more vacuuming, stretched again and even took a nap during the evening news. (It's always just bad news anyway)

I roused myself around seven and threw a pork loin in the oven. Made my pretty yummy baked beans with brown sugar, molasses, mustard, Worcestershire and bacon and even peeled a ton of taters for creamed potatoes. I HATE peeling potatoes and don't know why, it's not like it's hard to do. Maybe it's just because I grew up watching Gomer Pyle always being assigned to KP duty and peeling taters.


Fed the one Lost Boy left here (Zach dipped with a friend) and the other is in the process of moving out.  Put the food up for the others and started laundry again. I am now the proud owner of a house pretty stinking clean with four empty laundry baskets, three urine free toilet rims, and only Two Lost Boys.

Dr. Cotton will be home soon  and the cycle will begin again. Late night dinner while we talk about our day. Go to bed grateful for what we have not for what we want.

Hopefully waking up tomorrow with  3 kids,  3 pups, work, stretching, loving, sometimes arguing but always fighting the good fight.

If what doesn't kill you makes you stronger...somebody needs to buy me a cape.

Til next time, a pretty confident COTTON (Backed up by a posse of men)

PS May have typos but lap top was acting funky.

It's a Family Affair

Here's a picture of me and the kids at work....Friday is dress down day. Massey joined the team during the holidays and Zach started tonight. I look a little frazzled because it was a long twelve hour day.

I've been with the restaurant for almost two years  and it has literally been a salvation...mentally financially and emotionally. When I got fired from the Western Sizzler I was completely devastated not to mention totally broke. My husband had been out of work for a year  and I hadn't been fired from a job since I was twenty and totally irresponsible. Here I was almost fifty and one of the most dedicated employees they had and they kicked me to the curb like a piece of trash. (not that I'm still bitter in the least)

Massey has come on board as a hostess/buser. She cleans tables and resets them and seats people when forced to. She isn't crazy about being up front at the door...the public tends to get ugly when they have to wait for a table. She fits right in and everybody loves her...especially Barb and Len.

Zach has floundered since graduating high school and I have been more than lenient with him. He didn't know what he wanted to do, did some things he now knows he shouldn't do and simply wondered what to do. I think I am soft on him because I was exactly like him at his age. Totally lost with no direction or motivation. Zach and I are so alike personality wise that we often, VERY often butts heads and wits. He has a great sense of humor (like me) and a brilliant mind (I wish like me) but I love him. I love all my kids. If they were perfect  all the time they wouldn't be MY kids and would be a lot less fun to be around. One by one they have found their way, each taking a different path and often their own sweet time.

A friend of mine from high school has a great lead for Zach on a part time job and actually when I checked my voicemail after getting home tonight he had a call from them.

A couple of days ago I talked to Len about getting Zach on board with us at  the restaurant. He has always been interested in cooking and they needed some more help so I mentioned Zach to him. After talking with him they decided to give him a chance. They told him to come in on  Monday to train. Zach was glad to start on a slower day.

Today I opened the store and around noon Len told me a cook had called out and to call Zach and see if he could start tonight.

Zach was more than apprehensive about starting on a Friday night and I couldn't much blame him.  He said he'd come in but I could tell he dreaded it. No one wants to start in a restaurant on a Friday night at 5:30. I got off from the lunch shift and picked him up from the house, Massey from school and took them to get something to eat. By the time we got home it was time to go back to work.

I  thought they would start Zach off down on the salad station where most all new hires start.

NOPE! He was with the owner on the far end where they expedite the dinners...he was Len's "Bee-och" for the night.

He got home about a hour behind me and said it was the most fun and interesting job he has ever had. He said he made one dish and Len commented "You could have put more effort into that one." Zach  said he nodded and kept on going.

I am so relieved that my man/boy is working and I can tell that he is too.

 I work for good people and I work hard for them. In kind they have helped not only me out but my daughter and now my son.

It's a family affair...on their end AND ours! The waters are receding, the sun seems to be rising and my life is returning to what us Clampetts consider normalcy. We don't need much...a cement pond is WAY down the road but at least we haven't been kicked out of our house and all three kids have joined the work force!

I'm done with all my double shifts for the week and it is smooth sailing through the weekend. Life is good. Life is a puzzle. Life is always interesting. (when you are a Clampett)

It's so nice to feel good about myself again. It's so nice to feel good about all  three of my kids. It's actually just great to still be kicking!

One of my favorite blog readers came in to eat tonight...got her free dessert for mentioning my blog and I got to meet her mother. My buddy "Hoke" waited on her. He's a doofus but I love him to death...or maybe he is just always saying "You're killing me."

I tend to do that...just ask Tim!

Til next  time, a tired but contented COTTON

As The Dishwasher's at Work... Say "O MI Dios"

I "Think" my last day off was January 4th... I can't remember. I "Know" that I had January 1st off and find it hard to believe I would have taken two days off in one week. I was doing fine until I went into work this morning to open and knew I had to work a double shift. Then the new schedule was posted and I saw that I was working another double shift on Monday. I'm glad that I am, school is out for MLK Day and we should be busy but stupid football playoffs ruined lunch for us and by the time I came back for dinner all I wanted to do was go back home. Lucky for me the other waitress who was a double has been off for five days and wanted to stay. I clocked out by eight o'clock.

I look at  it this way...get home by eight and have a few hours to myself, go to bed by eleven and sleep for ten hours. Heck...That's ALMOST like a day off. I have tomorrow and Tuesday and then , "With God as my witness" I am taking a twenty four hour stay cation.

The kids and even the ole hubby have been really good lately about helping out...just goes to prove what a major meltdown/ shi* pitching tirade can do! (Maybe I should do it more often)

Granted they don't clean the way I would but when they at least give it their best effort, my job is halfway done. So they load the dishwasher but leave the sinks filthy and the traps full of cereal. I can deal with that.

So they empty the trash in the kitchen...and plop the bag down in the garage when the trash bin is only twenty feet away outside. That's saving me five feet of walking!

If I could just teach them to sort and fold socks I would be happy as a pig in slop. This is going to be "MY" year! Things are turning around and my head seems to have quit rotating 360 degrees when I have my meltdowns. Just yesterday I shooed away the Priest at my front door , telling him Reagan didn't live here anymore, but thanks for the offer of a "One time free" exorcism.

I truly believe if the economy didn't suck so bad we would have rebounded much sooner. I also  believe that having a job where I can work as much as I need to has helped tremendously. I am getting close to my breaking point but even closer to the point where I can take at least one day off a week and start to resemble my old self again. What sucks is that I have aged so much in the past two years that I hardly resemble my old self at all.

On the up side, at least now Massey knows what her Grandma, who she never got to meet looks like!
I can do this..two shifts tomorrow and only one on Tuesday. I may rename myself "Wednesday's Child."

I don't mean to sound like my life sucks. I mean the total opposite. These past two years have been the greatest test I have ever endured and I think I'll give myself a B+ and shoot for an A+ in 2012!

Cooking some delectable grilled cheese sandwiches and crawling into bed with my pups.  Tim's still at work. HEY! It's first come first serve in our bed. He can kick them out when he gets home...til then they are the most fabulous foot warmers EVER!

Til next time...Counting down the days COTTON!

Christmas is Next Week, Right?

I have two days til Christmas Eve and haven't done anything. No tree... It's the first time in 51 years I have never had a live tree. I've bought two presents and one of them has already been given.

I make myself feel better by saying "Christmas isn't til next week." In fact Christmas is on Sunday, which is the first day of the week...so I'm good til next week.

I'm not  stressing too much. My kid's are old enough to know I am broke as a joke. My sister and I have agreed to not buy each other presents. I am giving my brother a check for $1000.00 post dated for 2014 and giving my nephews gas cards. Depending on how much I make tomorrow on my double shift...  they may get twenty a piece or if I hit the jack pot, thirty.

I am more concerned about buying a ham and a turkey for sandwiches on Christmas Day when everyone comes to our house.

I truly believe that this is our last "poor" year. I have Massey's wish list covered when I get off from my lunch shift  Thursday, my boys could care less about a present  and as long as I have plenty of food and drink we will have a fabulous time.

It's hard to be fifty one and struggling. On the other hand it has brought me promptly back to Earth. Nothing is promised, nothing is  guaranteed. The things that are important change as you grow older and you simply adapt.

I am more worried about getting my house clean before everyone comes over on Christmas Day to get their "Non" presents. I have two dogs and two teens who battle for the messiest and I am working double shifts on Thursday and Friday... My oldest son has moved away but will be here too.

It will be a house full of Leach/Cottons and a place that will warm my heart and soul.
It will be what Christmas is all about...family, fun and tons of laughter.

My present will be all of us being together. Trust me, when my brother and sister are here...add me in the mix and it is a pretty good time!

We had great parents...they left us way too early but left us in the company of each other. I think being  around my sister and brother is the greatest Christmas present I could ever wish for.

I may not be able to buy presents but my family's "Presence" is just the thing I need !

Working double shifts Thursday and Friday. Have Saturday day off to scramble together food  and first/last minute shopping.

I have a feeling this will be the greatest Christmas EVER!

No wonder they call me Rotten Cotton...I am spoiled beyond belief. To put it simply... I am loved!

So I'm Old..

Got home from work tonight and walked into the house through the kitchen door. I had the thermostat set on 67 and it was 64 in the house. Now I am all about keeping cool all with my hot flashes, but knowing Massey is sleeping on the bottom floor of the house  and winter has made it's appearance known the past two days... it worried me.

I didn't want to open the attic door on  the top floor of the house,  flooding the upstairs with cold air in case it was something I couldn't quickly fix but did it anyway. The furnace was making noise so I scampered back down the stairs and quickly shut the door.

Like the new age techno savvy mom I am I went to Face book for an answer, getting post after post from a friend of mine from when I worked for Johnny's Pizza back in the early eighties. That's what broke people like..."Free advice."

We went through several question and answer  posts and after determining it was a gas furnace and secretly going into my kitchen to light the stove top to make sure we hadn't had our gas turned off, my friend mentioned maybe I should check the batteries in my digital thermostat. Heck I didn't even know it HAD batteries! I pulled the cover off and discovered three totally dust covered AA batteries. I went around the house and pulled three AA batteries out of remote controls and plugged them in. When the thermostat came back on the numbers were so bright it looked like a neon sign in Vegas.

I was on the phone by this point with my sister. It was cold in  the house so I started drinking some wine Barb had given me from work. (A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do to keep warm.)

When I changed the batteries we went from 64 to 65 in a matter of five minutes.

I told my sister I never even knew the thermostat ran on batteries.  It reminded me of the time when the kids were still young and they came out with the wireless mouse for your computer. Of course when they first came out you paid like thirty bucks for one and since we were still doing well back then I ran out to Circuit City and purchased it.

About eight months later it stopped working and I took the mouse back to the store. I told the woman behind the service counter  it had stopped working and wanted another one. She asked me if the batteries in it were new? I said I didn't know it took batteries and she simply replied "Baby, did you  think it was magic?"

Well as matter of fact I did! It came with a little plug in for my modem and I thought it was working off of that.  I felt like an idiot (what else is new) when she put in two AA batteries and it worked like a champ.

So a digital thermostat has batteries too... Learned me another lesson! We are back up to 65 but still a little chilly. I think my batteries were dead in my thermostat but may have a furnace problem too. Just going to bed with the oven on 200 degrees and dealing with it tomorrow.

Massey has a space heater in her room and I have one in the kitchen. All the rest of us are on the third floor where it is five degrees warmer.

Surviving another night here in the Cotton compound. If we can can live without money for two years we can make it one night without heat!

At least I don't have to worry about hot flashes tonight...

COTTON

Our Family Just Got a Bit Bigger

 I absolutely LOVE this picture of my parents. This was when my life was a safe and wonderful utopia. I look at  this picture and it immediately takes me back. My Diddy in his work shirt, my Mama in a shirt she sewed herself. The red and white checked wall paper in the back ground with the trivets hanging on the wall (which I still have) hung above the bench my brother and I sat on to eat dinner (I also still have the bench.) I was a lucky little kid...and having that childhood , it made me a lucky slightly over middle aged woman. My Mama died WAY too early and even when my Diddy died 25 years later it was also too soon. They left me and my sister in good hands.

 My brother is larger than life. I have never met anyone who doesn't love him...except maybe one of his former employees that didn't work hard and  felt the wrath he can whip out when you don't give something your all when you are being PAID to. He is single with no kids (that he knows of) and has worked his way through the ranks, starting years ago at Consolidated Freight on the loading dock and now is what  my sister and I consider a "Big Wig" with a huge  company. He probably can't afford to have kids because he is so good to his sisters.

 He has helped me out so much over the past couple of years that I almost feel like making my kids call him Uncle Daddy. I have never asked him for help and been denied.

 It's not like I call on a whim but when our life took a downward spiral, he was there for me and my family.. and has continued to be .

I've heard through the grapevine that he still has a request transfer in for Yemen.

So as my life begins to regain some type of semi regularity I started thinking about my Mama's side of the family. Mama died in 1977 which caused the whole side of her family to fall apart.

 She was the strong one. She grew up very poor, her mother divorced when divorce was unheard of. My grand mother started working full time and my mother pretty much raised her younger brother (my uncle.)  She doted on him and continued to throughout her adulthood.

My Mama met my Diddy,  they married and started spitting out babies. I think Cindy was born nine months to the day they were married (wink wink)  Chris came four years later and I surprised them  three years later when a condom probably broke while Chris and Cindy were  at a sleep over. We had a middle class family that was made to feel like a palatial family of five by my Mama's handy sewing,  art of refinishing and restoring anything she lay on her  hand on and their wonderful sense of  morals and clean living. Every one loved my parents...including me and my Sib's.

Once Mama died we lost touch with her side of the family. We have continued to keep in touch with Diddy's side through reunions every few years but the two cousins we had on my Mama's side got lost in the years of growing up and starting our own families.

Last year I starting creeping (as Massey calls it) on my cousins from my Mama's side of the family. I knew I had two but hadn't seen or heard from them since their own father (my Mama's brother died in the early eighties.) It took me a while but I tracked one down (like the stalker I am.)

We met up with her yesterday in Little Five Points, my favorite part of Atlanta. I arranged it all (like the creeper I am)   talked my sister and brother into going to meet with her after almost a quarter of a century. She is a jewelry designer in Atlanta and after quite a few  emails we decided we would all meet in Little Five for lunch. I wanted my brother to drive since gas is so high and we had given him back the gas card he loaned us for a year. He text Massey and said his Taurus was in  the shop and only had his Porsche. (rubbing my fists on my eyes like I am crying for him... NOT)

I told him I would pick him up in my little Beemer and we headed out for our adventure. We left his apartment complex and I mentioned I only had a quarter of a tank of gas and I needed to stop at Kroger and pump in ten bucks. We pulled up to the pump and he said (as usual bless his heart) "I got it."  When it hit $34 I hollered out the window for him to stop and thankfully he ignored me and filled my tank.

I don't think he was pumped about going but he is my new DIDDY and has resigned himself to the fact. We got to L5P's and parking was $5. I tried to pay (I really half way did) but he  chucked another five out his window and we parked.

We met my cousin in Junkman's Daughter and when she walked in it all changed...for the better!

We connected immediately. It was like all the years lost simply dropped away. She was cute as a button, the spitting image of her mother with a new age twist.

We all went across the street to have lunch. It was me, my brother and sister, my sister's oldest son and my youngest daughter Massey, who is named after my Mama's maiden name which happens to be my new found cousin's LAST name! Ain't life weird?

We had an absolute ball.
Number one: my brother is so funny he makes me seem gloomy.
Number two: My sister is the most precious person I have ever met.
Number three: Our new found cousin was a breath of fresh air in a part of our family we thought was gone forever .

We laughed, we ate, drank... we remembered and  shared so many memories. She was all I expected her to be and then some. She is beautiful and successful and  made me realize my Mama's side of the family isn't gone...we've just lost touch. Family is important to me and this re connection was amazing and eye opening.

My new found cousin and Massey got up to go to the restroom and my brother followed . The waiter brought the bill and like the quick,  broke thinker I am said "Wait til I go the restroom. When they get back , if you can get my brother to pick up the whole check My sister and I will each give you an extra five bucks."
DING DING DING DING!!

Bless my brother's heart...I bet he is at home right now researching if his company has any locations further away than Yemen. He not only paid the entire bill and tipped but bought me a tank of gas and paid for parking for a wild hair I had to find a cousin we haven't seen in decades.

But you know what? After we left  the restaurant , we went by her jewelry design shop to take a look.

 We got back in my little Beemer to go home. My bro commented "There aren't many artists that can support themselves totally with their craft. I'm impressed."

I was impressed with the entire day.

 I have a new found cousin who is a total delight.  I have a full tank of gas and  am reminded once again how important family is (especially brothers)

My life has had its ups and downs. It has good days and bad days. But if you have good FAMILY...you have the warranty. They will have your back...no matter what.

Til next time...COTTON

What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stronger... And Ready For the Next Hit

 I had a horrible  yesterday. Thank the Lord it is behind me. I have had a tough couple of years I would like to forget but need to remember.

When life is going great it is TRULY great.
Life can change in an instant and end just as quickly. Mine hasn't ended (yet) but yesterday I reached the end of the frazzled rope I have been desperately clinging to.

Work sucked (which it normally doesn't) and my kids were driving me the short distance to crazy. By the time I got home from yet another double shift... I sat in my car for five minutes in the garage wondering how people actually hook up those hoses that feed  exhaust fumes into the car. After five minutes I had a good cry , remembered I had thrown away the garden hose anyway so I got out of the car and went inside.

I called my sister and we complained together.  I am fifty one years old. I should be picking out a time share in Aruba. Instead I am picking out who to kite a check to to keep the utilities on and continually telling myself "It could be worse ."

I woke up this morning after a late night big ole fat come to Jesus meeting with my nineteen year old son who is playing me like a broke fiddle (huge pun intended.) I finally broke down with him (blubbering like a baby) and broke it all down FOR him.

I am a server. If I need money I work. If I need more money I work more shifts. If I don't have money  I can't take days off. If he doesn't help me he's hurting me. If I'm hurt I can't work. If I can't work you may as well kite another one of my checks,  go ahead and buy another garden hose... run it into the garage and crank the engine on my car up....and pick up a shovel while you are there.

My point hit him hard...my fists wanted to but he's a smart kid, He got it!

Sometimes you just have to lay it out. "This is our life, this is the way it is. It could be a heck of a lot worse or we can try our best to make it better."

I was a VERY stupid kid and didn't begin to grow up til I was in my late twenties. I lost my Momma at the age of seventeen and my Diddy didn't have a clue ...Momma raised us,  he brought home the pay check and gave out the occasional whooping with his belt when we did something bad.

My family is much the same way...Tim brings home his paycheck and asks where he left his belt when he gets up to leave for work.

It's getting better, it really is. I just have a meltdown once every six weeks or so (you think the fam would be marking the days on their calendar.)

Let me cry and puff up my eyes, make Zach hug and tell  me he loves me ... Massey will clean her room and after a good night's sleep it is back to what "We" call normal.

Til next time...Hangin' on and doing it again tomorrow COTTON

Not a Fan of the Time Change...

We'll get to the time change in a minute...

I found this old ID card of Zach's in a junk drawer last week and still laugh every time I see it.  Number one if the look on his face isn't pitiful enough just look at his hair.
This was the year  Zach began to rage against the "machine" and entered his Anarchy phase that he is currently still in at the age of nineteen. He wouldn't cut his hair (like THAT made any kind of statement) but realized at a young age how pathetic society was becoming (making ME realize what a smart kid he really was.)

I love the way he filled out the back of the card. Under distinguishing features he wrote "Ugly, thin, fast." That's my boy! A 90 lb runt with "Dirdy" blond hair that can out run anybody.

I saw a picture the other day that reminded me of Zach. Someone had spray painted on the side of a building "Spread Anarchy." Someone else had come back and crossed it out and spray painted "Don't tell me what to do!"

I've got my hands full with this man/boy but if he ever realizes his full potential "Look out world!" He will make Bill Gates look like Urkel.

Now on to the time change...I HATE IT. I have an internal alarm clock and now  wake up every morning a hour early.  I NEED that extra hour sleep but haven't had it yet.

The only time I liked it was when all the kids were too young to tell time. Five thirty would hit and the sun would go down. I would tell them all "Go put on your PJ's and Momma will read you ONE more story before you go to bed." Come six o'clock and I had the rest of the night to myself!

When Tim and I first got married and were pretty poor (the first time around) we would wait til we had a few extra bucks and buy the kid's a toy they wanted and a cake from Wal Mart and announce to them in an excited voice "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!" It worked for several years til they started school and learned how to tell time and read a calendar (Darn those teachers!)

It's always been like that in my house...CRAZY but full of love.

Even my Anarchist still calls me Mommy when he is sick or wants something from "This" machine. When I call home from work on the restaurant's phone he will answer our house phone "Thank you for calling Mama Lucia's... how can I help you?" The first time he did it I thought I  inadvertently called the office from the hostess stand and someone from the restaurant had answered.

 He's a trip... he's WAY too much like me and it is a constant battle of wits, sarcasm and mental arm wrestling. I wouldn't have it any other way (well maybe I would but it ain't gonna happen so I just love him like he is.)

I got my $7.99 coupon in the mail from Great Clips today and went and got "re- butched" between my shifts. When I went back to work the Latino cook said "Hola nino." He asked me where I got my hair cut and I told him a military base.

I like my hair short, it takes all the gray out takes ten seconds to style and six weeks to need another cut. "True THAT!"

I shouldn't even count the number of days in row that I work but I do. My last day off was Oct. 29 but I have tomorrow off and I am elated. All my checks have cleared and I am the proud owner of $5.99 in my checking account. Went by and threw forty bucks at Verizon when I got off tonight and in celebration wrote a check at Kroger (God bless their three day processing time) for some groceries.

Tim didn't get his promotion but we are making strides, don't have to worry about renting out our house and it gets just a bit easier every week.

A "Bit" is all I need to keep "My" machine going.

Til next time...COTTON

I See The Other Side

I feel like Charlie did in this picture... trapped but can now see the way out!

I have been behind the fence for two years and waited patiently...sometimes frantically while friends,  family and even strangers fed and took care of me. I made my way TO the gate but just couldn't open it on my own. With help from Above and help from MANY around me, I have made my way not only TO the gate but have my own fat head sticking through it.

There were times when I felt hopeless and alone even with all the love and support. Being fifty and broke ain't no joke and pretty hard to explain to teens that have had it good for as long as they could remember. In hindsight it has been a wonderful lesson for not only me...but THEM.

Nothing is a guarantee in life, not even the next breath you may or may not take.

I have been at my new job for a year and a half...Tim at his for about six months and we are slowly busting through the gate.  We have one shoulder through and wedging  with the other.

My bosses have been great. They have helped and supported me so many times I have lost count. Tim has a new job with  many opportunities for advancement. Actually he has an offer on the table for an advancement as I type. He has just gotten home from work and told me they have offered him a position as a terminal manager in Charlotte, North Carolina.
Am I scared?
A little.
Am I excited for my husband? YES!

I have never moved further than thirty miles from the city and house I was raised in. Am I nervous? Yes a little... but if this is the way to bust RIGHT OUT OF THE GATE and to charge ahead, who am I to question destiny?

Is this God's answer to our prayers? Lots to think about, lots of things to figure out...

Til next time...COTTON

Johnny is in the ICU ...

Johnny is sick. He won't even turn over when I try the key...no response,  not even a groan.  At first I thought  he was just being stubborn and  jealous of my convertible "Betty the Beemer" but after the surgeon Dr. Slocum came over and diagnosed him with a dead battery I felt kinda bad. The surgeon installed a new battery and that didn't help. Geez...I hope it isn't a tumor or stage four lawn mower cancer. Granted I HAVE been showing Betty a lot more attention, but I don't ride Johnny to work and he only has to work a couple of days a week whereas Betty gets me around all day ...every day. Now the surgeon thinks it may be the safety switch. I have my fingers crossed that will fix the problem. My front yard looks like a cemetery  that has been neglected and my back yard looks like a jungle,  proving my theory that dog poop is an excellent fertilizer.

My surgeon doubles as a flight attendant and has a trip tomorrow...obviously he doesn't understand the dire need I have to hear ole Johnny cranked and cuttin'. I don't have a lot of spare time and what spare time I DO have has to be used wisely. Guess I'll have to show ole Johnny some special attention when he gets back on his feet/ tires. Sounds like a Lube Job is needed!!!

Is it sad that I almost love my lawn mower more than my car? Is it sadder that my kid's are barely ahead of my car and lawn mower ? Is it even MORE sad that my husband comes in sixth? I actually love my husband more than life but rarely tell him  (no reason to spoil him when the lawn mower and car can't tell on me.)

Hoping for a firm diagnosis this weekend and we can all can go back to the normal pecking order. Me in charge, Tim thinking he is, the kid's hoping I am and the dog's just grateful to be fed and petted. So far Johnny and Betty haven't complained about having to sleep in the garage...

Til next time Crazy Cotton!

ONE MORE DAY!!!!!!!!!

If he can make it through six more hours of school...stick a fork in his skinny little butt, "He's Done!"

Got the email today from his teacher...which royally ticked Zach and his global sized ego off. She told me he had one more paper to turn in, his senior paper on Culinary Arts.

I found it on the computer and had my sister edit it ...after I had edited it. I'm getting this boy out of school no matter what. If I have to sleep with one of the custodian's so what? They are generally the nicest people at the school and the one's being paid the least. I thought wouldn't it be great if he buffed all my floors before he left or took the trash out for me? Talk about a win/win situation!

Zach burred all up when I told him I was going to edit his paper. He said it was four pages long and that was good enough. He also said he was 18 and in charge of his own education...I simply walked away, to the computer and sat down and edited his paper anyway. The paper was pretty well written, although, he seemed to have a comma after every other, single word. (get my drift?)

He still doesn't understand the "There Their They're" rule when he is writing or most probably thinks it reads the same either way so...NEXT PARAGRAPH!

Now was the hard part...getting him to turn this paper in with the corrections. I knew he had a hard time making the paper four pages long. His first draft was done in font # 42 and there were three inches between each paragraph...Helen Keller could have read it.

Once that horrible relentless tyrant of a teacher who made her every day goal to torment Zach (NOT) told him it had to be in a certain font, he faltered.

He finally made it four pages long, but barely. I gave the new one to him this morning and said "I know you didn't want help but Aunt Cin taught English for years and wanted to give you the gift of cleaning up your paper. This one doesn't have one grammatical error or wrong punctuation ...the only bad thing is that it made the paper a bit longer, will that count off?"

BINGO!!!!!!!

I called my sister and told her about my skills as a mother of an 18 year old know it all who didn't have a clue as to what really happened. She said "Kelly, I only taught English for two years." I told her that two was plural and we were calling it "Years."

It was the same paper with the same ideas and same message, it just flowed better now.

NEXT DAY...

My husband said not to say too much (who ME?) because Zach would get suspicious and he was right (that's the second time in 23 years, he's on a roll!) I didn't mention it again.

I took him to school this morning...the LAST morning of his high school career/4 year debacle and when he got out of the car actually said "Thanks for the paper."

I said a prayer in the parking lot before I ever pulled off. "Dear Lord, let him make it five more hours without a major blow up."

As Zach used to say when he was four "My prayers came right!"

He's done!! He has pushed me to limits I never knew I possessed but has given me what I asked for..."Do it and get OUTTA there with a diploma." I am a bit apprehensive about graduation. When they call his name, if the faculty doesn't give him a standing ovation (obviously more for themselves than him) they will most certainly start a wave and begin that old chant from high school football games in the seventies... "Na na na nah, Na na na nah, Hey - hey...Good Bye."

As we say around these parts... "My boy's done gonna git gradgiated."

I don't know who's happier, me or them. All I DO know is that it ain't been easy when it could have been but at least we all have somehow survived....and that's a GOOD thing!

His dress pants are at the cleaners and he is headed to graduation practice tomorrow at 9AM.

Life is looking up! Even more good news came today but that is another blog. I like to leave you with a cliff hanger because my life seems to be such a great soap opera.

Stay tuned........COTTON

A Word From The Wise

I went to the high school today to help with the big consignment sale before work.

They had plenty of help so I helped in the most critical way...I went shopping.

I got Zach three pair of jeans, two pair of shorts and a sweater. I got some Levi's for myself and spent less than I do when I pick up dinner at a drive thru. It's like I went clothes shopping on the "Dollar Menu".

I went into work at 4 and by 5 I was totally lost. I shared a 15 top with another girl and had six other tables. The owner's wife came up and told me to pick up another table in the bar area and I felt like I was in a pin ball machine.

My new co-worker "Weeds" even said "I think we'll call you Weeds Senior".

It was the busiest two hours of my life.

The manager who was expediting food coming out of the kitchen remarked "When is the last time you helped run some food to a table"?

I felt like saying "Last night "... but stopped what I was doing and pitched in to help.

It didn't stop until almost 9:00 and by then I was so exhausted, mentally and physically that I began to wonder why I have this crazy job?

Zach brought me to work so they could have my car to pick Massey up from practice at nine and come back to pick me up when I got off (hubby still having car issues).

I didn't get off til almost 11:00 and when Zach came to pick me up he came in the front door of the restaurant.

Everyone at work knows Massey. She babysits for a couple of the girls and has hung out with me on some day shifts.

Zach is my loner.

He has worked there twice but in the kitchen so only the kitchen peeps know him.

The bartender told him we were closed, and he said he was waiting for his mom.

There were a couple of regulars at the bar and one or two tables left in the store.

One of the regulars at the bar was "Mr. P". He comes in on a regular basis. He is an older gent, and I use that word because he is a gentleman in every sense .

He wears a suit and tie all the time. If not a suit and tie...he is dressed to the nines. He grew up in Brooklyn, New York.

At Christmas we had a giving tree in the lobby from the Salvation Army. Some little girl wanted a bike and Mr. P wheeled in a brand new girls bike complete with tassells coming out of the handle bars, a basket on front and even a helmet . He said growing up he never had a bike and wanted this little girl to have one. BAM! She did.

I gripe about Zach to my sister and to you (he never reads my blog) but have never mentioned Zach to Mr. P.

Massey has sat next to him several times and eaten, with him always offering to buy her meal. I don't think I have ever mentioned my two boys to him.(my bad)

Tonight when Zach came to pick me up, Mr. P said "Is this one of yours"?

I introduced Zach to Mr. P and told him he was my middle child.

The first sentence out of Mr. P's mouth was "Are you doing good in school ?...you better be because chasing the skirts takes a lot of money and with a good education you can make a lot of ladies happy".

Zach shot me a look like "Thanks a lot" and I quickly told Zach I had never even mentioned having other kids besides Massey to Mr. P.

You brag about the good one's and help out the struggling one's is my motto.

I had to go to the back to check out in the office and when I came back Mr. P was still lecturing Zach on what it takes to make something of your life.

God bless Mr. P.

After we left, Zach said "He was a pretty cool old man."

Obstinate teens can buck and rebuff every single thing a parent says and tries to do.

Let a wise man...a "Dapper Gent" give them a dressing down on their first meeting and it is incredible what they take away from it.

I may have to see if Mr. P wants a room mate.

Made a ton of money...had someone connect with my teen that has disconnected from me for no apparent reason and once again realized the effects of Karma.


Keep giving...and it will be given back.

Keep the faith and faith will be restored to you.

Love and you will be loved.

It's simple...It's so simple that it amazes me.

The Bible sums up life in one sentence...

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you".

Is that really THAT hard to understand?

Somebody tell God we are sick of Winter in Georgia...He has some skinny Christians freezing down here!

Til next time...pumping up @ 100 pounds strong....COTTON

Love That Jingle...In My Pocket

I just got home from work and am sitting in my long winter coat and hat typing away. 95 pound girls aren't made for this kind of weather.

Worked a double shift. Lunch was awesome. Some girls I used to work with came in and started my day off right. I made $80 at lunch and was off in time to pick Massey up from school and pick up my fruit order from the band room from a Guard fund raiser.

Last time I worked, Barb (the owner's wife) told me I needed a pair of gloves. Barb comes off like a hard ass but she has a heart as big as the Pacific . She dogged me out for not having gloves and pulled a pair out of her coat pocket. She said "I have a pair of gloves in every coat I own." I told her that was nice to know, and now I knew where to find a pair.

Today when she came into work she said "Merry early Christmas" and handed me a pair of gloves she had bought for me.

Now my hands stay nice and toasty!


Went back to work at 5 and we all thought the bad forecast would kill business...boy were we wrong!

I waited on four tables and made over $100.

Like I have said before, my new place is all about "Quality"  not "Quanity."

Sold several bottles of wine,  lots of Cappaccino and Espresso and walked out before 10 with over $100 in my pocket.

LOVE that JINGLE...in my pocket!

Another server had cleaned out her closet and brought Massey a big bag of clothes. Gotta love those young servers...it was all Abercrombie, Old Navy and Hollister.

She even had some bigger sized jeans and tops that she had from when she was a bit larger. Massey has a friend who's family is having a really tough time and the girl wears that exact size. Not only does Massey have new clothes but we have a bag full to give to her friend.

Karma is a wonderful thing.

I am kind of worried about this whole loan modification we have been "Attempting" to go through. They have called us yet again and we have to fax the same exact documents for the third time. Who's running their office? The three stooges?

Tim seems to be worried that most people are upside down in their mortgage and we aren't. We only have a couple more years and he  is concerned that  is the reason for them dragging their feet. They could make money off of our house.

My sister gave me our seemingly  do nothing congressman's email address  and I am fighting this battle to the hilt. Can't hurt, might help. I am sending him a short email with the short version of our situation and hoping that maybe he can end a golf game early and do something for us.

I am off tomorrow and going to get a tree. I don't care if it looks like Charlie Brown's...I have NEVER not had a tree.

 I even have presents to put under it!

Tomorrow night is Massey's Christmas Chorus concert. Once again I am going to do something with my girl...almost makes me feel like Zach is right about me spoiling her.

Except!!!

On Monday I was working a lunch shift, busy as crap when Zach sent me a text. "You need to come check me out. I didn't eat breakfast and all they gave me for lunch was an undercooked Chicken sandwich. I am starving."

What am I supposed to do with THAT?

I sent a text back from the restroom "Text your dad."

Thirty minutes later I got a call from the school that Zach had been on camera leaving the campus and hadn't returned. GREAT!

It took several trips back to the restroom to send him multiple texts "WHERE ARE YOU?"

I finally got one back. He had walked over 3 miles to McDonald's and then to a friend's house who hadn't gone to school that day. It was 17 degrees and he walked in a hoodie over 3 miles. He called me to say his friend's Mom was home and made him some lunch

What part of breaking all  rules and having to deal with the consequences doesn't my boy get?

The next day I had to speak with the principal...who actually made me feel better. He said they had some kid's that would attend one class, skip another and then show back up for the next.

As the owner at work said to me..."So your boy is the best of the worst."

I think I like his take on it.

Zach is even skinnier than me. Walking the town in teen degree weather in a hoodie and knowing he was in trouble but putting it off made my heart drop and my blood pressure go up.

I decided to take the high road and go easy on him. He was already scared to come home and obviously knew how much he had "Effed" up.

His new nickname is "Skipper."

They say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Zach is making it  my Mantra.

I have to think of my life with my kids as comical or it would kill me on the spot.

I look at it THIS way...Len was right, "Zach is the best of the worst."

At least he's batting 500.

Keeping the faith and trying to be "Jolly."

Til next time...COTTON

My Hoop is Shrinking...Thank The Lord I'm Skinny

I used to feel like I was jumping through hoops...now I feel like I am trying to squeeze through the eye of a needle.

Yesterday was my only day off and I still have a massive week ahead of me. After the kids went to school and I fought the DHR followed by a disturbing call from Wells Fargo I fell into a funk. Actually I fell back into bed. Sometimes when the going gets tough...the tough takes a nap.

 I was supposed to go visit a friend at Scottish Rite but I didn't have enough gas. I had the .50 for the toll booth at Hwy 400 but it was either go or not have enough gas to get to work today.

I've gotten used to being broke. Sometimes I'm broker than other times but  realize that after what we have been through we will be broke for a while. Better to be broke than "Broken."

My husband started out my crappy week (God bless him, he didn't mean to.) I told him I would have a certain amount to give him for the house note on Monday. When you are a server you can't COUNT on anything but HOPE it happens. Unfortunately for him it didn't happen and I was short on my donation. He flipped out and said "You said you would HAVE it." I calmly said (well maybe not real calmly) "You know  a few months ago we couldn't even MAKE a house note...now we are only $100 short. You should be giving me a high five not a dressing down."

Needless to say he felt like crap and once again one of my Sib's came to our rescue. I swear  they must feel like conspiring  as to what will be the best way to ex communicate me from the family...I am living up to my my maiden name of  "Leach"...with the "A" replaced with an "E."

But my sister came through, just like she and  my brother always do and we are good for another thirty days.

Then the mortgage company called. I am sure by now there is a note in our file that says "Do NOT ask to speak to Mrs. Cotton!" (Exclamation point and all)

This woman said our loan modification had just landed on her desk and she needed "blah blah blah" to be faxed to "blah blah blah."

Already frustrated and feeling blue because it was my Mother's birthday ... if she had lived she would be 81. Instead I was FEELING 81 and didn't have her to turn to.

I told this woman I was absolutely perplexed by the hoops,  that were turning into the eye of a needle  we were having to jump/squeeze through for a loan modification. We have had our house for almost 15 years and for 13 of those years  were never late ONE TIME. My husband lost his job and then I lost mine. We got 5 months behind but have made an on time payment for the last four months. When we bought our house in 1997 for $109,000 and signed a mortgage it meant in the end we would pay almost  half a million dollars for our house...now who is benefitting from that...US or THEM? It doesn't take rocket scientist to just take those five months we couldn't pay and tack them on to the end of our mortgage. It would be to their advantage that they could rape us for five more  months and not have another empty house sitting and growing into an eye sore that brings down the property value of the entire neighborhood.  Immediately she said "That is exactly what I am trying to do for you."

Well slap my face and call me stupid...but why in the world am I having to fax the same exact documents over and over and over to the same exact mortgage company over and over and over about the same exact house?

I know by now there is an asterisk by my name and probably a "DON'T TALK TO" note.

I told the woman on the phone that I was more comfortable with the LAST guy that had contacted me because he was in Atlanta and not in Minnesota where she was,  but I would fax all their "blah blah blah " stuff again...One copy to the guy here in the ATL and one copy to her in Minnesota. I told her whoever could help me would get the first thank you note.

My husband is much nicer to them always telling them "Thank you for your help." I am more inclined to say "Why are ya'll dragging this out?"  If  I thought they were gonna foreclose I would wash all three of my dogs in the bath tub tonight and not even rinse it it...take THAT Wells Fargo! Now you got a house with dog hair in the drain and no one that is gonna clean it out. Not to mention vacuum the carpet.

They make me feel like we are in jeopardy of losing our house while they all sit behind their desk dragging their feet like Neanderthal's...scrubbing their knuckles on the ground while we are trying to keep our heads above water.
It makes me wonder "Who is trying to help WHO?"

My hoop isn't a hoop anymore...it is the eye of a needle and makes me grateful that I only weigh 95 pounds. If I turn sideways...we MAY make it through.

I won't quit until they come drag me out. I won't give up until I take them all down with me. I won't quit until I know I have tried and tried and tried EVERY option.

Obviously they don't know they are dealing with a Leach.

I had me a day off...I have thought about this a lot. I am ready for the fight. I don't think they realize what or who they are facing. I may be little  but I have a HUGE bite. Pray for me as I challenge the giants..or maybe I should ask you to pray for the Giants!

No one is taking this house. No one is ousting my family. No one is telling me  we can't beat the odds. No one is telling me that we haven't come a long, long way.

If we have made it this far...we can make it!
"BRING IT"

Til next time..a newly confident COTTON

He is Risen and I'm on the Rise

These pictures are from our Easter dinner at my sister's house. I had to work today (a good thing) and Tim had to work tonight (another good thing) so we all met this afternoon after I got off at my sister's old farm house to enjoy a beautiful day of sunshine and celebration of not only Easter's true meaning but the true meaning of family.


My family has dwindled down to me, my sister and my brother. Of course my sister is married with kids , I am married with kids but both of our parents are gone and our last grandparents have been gone since I was in my early twenties, the first set gone before I was born.

My brother is a bachelor...thank goodness! He spends all his money on me and my sister and our brood of kids. He is hands down their "Favorite" uncle and our favorite brother!

He told us today at dinner that he was being transferred back to Orlando. God bless him, he has to get away from us because he has helped us out so much I am surprised he doesn't use call blocking on our phone numbers. I asked him today if that was Orlando, Yemen he was transferring to? Didn't get a straight answer but I am pretty sure it is the Orlando in Florida.

My nephews were there, with their sweeties and my one nephew's sweetie brought her daughter(seen in the photos.) A precocious girl who at the age of six is a tiny adult with the heart of a child. She fit right in with our eclectic family and seemed to have a ball.

Our family is an unpretentious one, accepting and loving and always welcoming. Yes we are Liberals and proud of it. We don't beat our beliefs into other people...they are our beliefs, every one should have their own.

The day was filled with kiddie fun for Ava, and wonderful food and drink for all. I am so blessed to have such a loving family and would be six feet under by now without them.

Work is getting easier and I am feeling my confidence coming back to me as a server. I have been stressed out like I was performing brain surgery instead of serving a meal on a dish. I know it will take a while to dig out of the hole we have gotten in but at least now I have a shovel.

Between family, friends and my shovel I know now that we will be okay...eventually.

For most people Facebook is a social network, for me it has been a salvation. Friends have written me, encouraged and supported me ..emotionally mentally and financially. Without my FB friends I really don't think I would have made it this far...literally.

Besides being grateful first for God and his Son this Easter, I am grateful for more. On top of having a Saviour that gave his life for me I have friends, family and even strangers that have kept my family afloat and given me the will to keep going in the face of overwhelming adversity.

The top picture is me with my nephew "Apolo Ohno." I could have posted a picture of me with my other nephew but when you can pose with "Apolo" or the guy from "Napoleon Dynamite" I think that one's a given. Granted my other nephew is handsome as well but when he wears his glasses he DOES resemble ole "Napoleon."

The other pics are of me and my girl, Massey and one is of my sister with Massey and Ava. The other is a photo of my 17 year old looking like the teen age son in "Little Miss Sunshine." (Great movie...a must see)

Click on them all to see them up close...that is how I feel about my family in a nut shell..."UP CLOSE."

Til next time , hoping you all had a blessed and happy Easter... COTTON TAIL

Guess I Need "Apps For Dummies"

I didn't mean for these pics to be so out of whack...but they are a few of my faves from Christmas' past. You can click on them and see them larger...Dang, GOOD TIMES...they WILL return!

Just got home from work, passing Tim as he heads out the door TO work. This reminds me of when we first got married and I worked all nights and he worked the early morning bakery route.

It was painfully slow at work although any shift at work seems painful to me these days.

Ran into a friend from FB in the restaurant. She was my brother's age so I really didn't know her in school. When you are younger 5 or 6 years difference in age means a lot. She was with her mother (still sharp as a tack) and since it was slow I had time to chat with them about growing up in East Point. We knew a ton of the same people and it was fun reminiscing about old times.

Came home and checked out Facebook to see about a zillion requests and invitations from various people. I don't normally look at them but since it said "over 100 other requests" I took a look. I really have no idea what any of them mean or whether I should respond. I see a lot of pillows beings thrown, hearts being sent, hugs given and the latest rage seems to be "someone sent you a Christmas present...you may not be able to open it til Christmas morning."

There's an idea! If only I knew what the presents were, maybe I could get up REALLY early on Christmas morning and unwrap them, decide which of my kids they would suit the best...re wrap them and put tags on all of them and scream upstairs "SANTA CAME, SANTA CAME...come look what he brought you!!"

Luckily my kids are old enough now to realize that this will be a slim to anorexic Christmas and still they seem okay with that.

You know, Massey really likes those little white powdered doughnuts and Zach would be happy with two huge boxes of Lucky Charms (they're magically delicious.) I think my oldest son would be happy finding out Christmas morning that we are still letting him live here and eat up all our food and we will continue to feed his dog as well.

I get nervous when I click on an app and it says "by clicking on this application you give full access to your profile and information, etc..." It's not like I work for the FBI or have anything that anyone would want, but I worry about viruses and the last thing I need is a computer crash.

My friends on Facebook have been so supportive and nice to me that I feel bad not accepting their various gifts. HEY! I could use a hug, a kiss..a heart given, or even a Christmas present but I have no idea what it means, other than people are sending well wishes my way. Call me stupid (you'd be right) but I am just not that into all the apps, mafia wars and farmville stuff. Just connecting with friends is enough for this old girl. Knowing my luck I would click on an app and it would be one of our creditors. This close to Christmas I just can't take that chance.

Christmas will be fine, I am sure of it. Years down the road we will all laugh and talk about "Do you remember that ONE Christmas when we got powdered doughnuts , Lucky Charms and you let TJ keep living in your Old Lady's room?"

I am going to HAVE to get over the hate that I feel for my job, suck it up and work my butt off from now til Christmas. Get the bills paid and somehow go and get at least one nice small present for each of my three kids. And you know what? Knowing my kids like I do, they will be grateful for what they should . We are making the best of a bad situation and still have a home, heat and food . Granted there has been lots of tomato soup and grill cheese sandwiches...but this too shall pass!

Everything will be okay. I have plenty of decorations in the attic and can go back in the woods and chop a tree down. What matters is that we are together and love each other.

Dang! I can hardly wait for the Christmas we all sit around and laugh about this one.

Til next time... a truly grateful Cotton