Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Kicking The Hornet's Nest

I know all too well about "Kicking the hornet's nest."  A few years back I was trying to cut back the Pampas grass that was over taking my front yard by the front door. I was hacking away with the hedge clippers when I hit a hornet's nest.  By the time I realized what had happened they were all over me. They were stuck in my hair stinging me like crazy and swarming all around my face and even in my eyes. I threw down the clippers and after trying to run from them found out they can fly a LOT faster than I can run. I ran in the front door of the house and flew (pun intended) up the stairs to my shower on the third floor of the house. I bet I washed thirty of them out of my hair and the pain was almost unbearable. They sting repeatedly unlike bees that sting once and die from their mistake.

I have never been allergic to stings but this attack put me to bed with a high fever and even gave me a serious case of the runs. I had to call out at work which I hadn't done since my father died.

 The next week I asked the manager where I worked (who did pressure washing, chimney cleaning and other odd jobs on the side) to come over and get rid of the Pampas grass for us. He came over with a five gallon can of gasoline and dumped the entire can over the bush. (I didn't say he was smart)

Zach was probably about 8 or 9 at the time and completely into fires. He was my little pyromaniac. His eyes lit up when he saw how much gas my manager used to douse the grass. As my manager lit a piece of paper to throw on the bush I grabbed Zach and pulled him back about ten feet as the Napalm bomb went off. It literally shook the ground and scared the poop out of me. The flames were over twenty feet high and my manager grinned and said "That ought just about do it."

After running for the garden hose and soaking the remains before my entire house caught on fire, I realized he was in fact right. We all stood looking at nothing but a black hole in my front yard but at  least the nest was gone, along with my manager's eyebrows.

I hadn't thought about the "Hornet's Nest" again until I started reading the third book in the "Girl With The Dragon Tattoo" series. It's titled "The Girl Who Kicked The Hornet's Nest."

I work for some pretty crazy folks. Don't get me wrong, I love them to death but they can flare up those temper's with little or no notice given the right ignition at the wrong time. Once their temper is flared you have to simply step back ten feet as I did with Zach  all those years ago and wait for the fire to burn out.

When the owner says something to his wife to tick her off I immediately say "Quit kicking the hornet's nest!"  When the son gets his Dad all fired up for no reason I repeat  the order. It's become a running joke with us all at work.

Yesterday I worked yet another double and was still trying to recover from the "Mother of a Day" I had on Sunday. I was working with another server and we had a big party together at lunch.  My crazy boss wasn't cooking but our even crazier Latino cook was. He is one of the best cooks we have but can also be the biggest pain in the butt  you could ever imagine.

Here's the thing you need to know about every cook in every restaurant. They are ALWAYS right and servers are always stupid.  Even when the cooks are wrong they are right. When the server is right and the cooks are wrong...it is still the server's fault.  That is just the way it is in the restaurant world!

My co worker simply asked a question of our Latino buddy. Granted he was busy, but instead of being nice about it he flew into an immediate tirade. I looked at my co worker and simply said "PLEASE don't kick the Piñata!"

Another cook  working on  the line who speaks about ten words a month (even though he is American) and seldom cracks a smile actually almost laughed.  I gave myself ten points for THAT score!

I am tired. I am tired of being tired but at least I can still laugh at work and make others laugh too.  It's crazy working in the restaurant world...guess that's why I landed here!

I have ONE more double shift tomorrow and then have Thursday all to myself and my boyfriend, Johnny Dear.

It's been a hard climb back but when you make the climb and can see the corner up ahead it makes it all worth while.

My restaurant is family to me...and I am the crazy relative they all want to deny being related to but love even if they won't admit it. One of the cooks was giving me grief the other night and I shot back "If I'm the worst one ya'll have working here, I'd say you're doing okay."

I have to get up tomorrow and take Massey to school then go in for two shows...one at 10:30 and another at 5:30.

All bills are ALMOST current and I even have a little slush fund of sixty bucks sitting in my bank account.

Took Zach to see his probation officer this morning and sat in the parking lot to wait on him. I told my boss when I got to work "If those people are the ones they let out I'd hate to see  the ones they left inside." At least Zach has made it to this point  and I am pretty confident that he will succeed from this point forward.

The last week was the hardest. I was working so much and having to leave hours before my shift to pick him up. One of the cooks at work (who I call Patrick)

offered to take Zach back to the Po key for me since he was closing the store too. I offered gas money and he refused but I forced some on him. He is politically as far to the right as I am to the left, which I suppose means we meet in the middle. He's a cook too which means he is always right..."Touche!"

His generosity and rides meant  that I got to sleep two hours earlier each night. He made my life MUCH easier and gave me two extra hours of looking at the back of my eye lids each morning. I've thought about what I can do to repay him. I gave him gas money but that seems lame. He likes Tatts so maybe I will offer to pay for part of a  a Glenn Beck tattoo on his butt.  In my opinion, that's where Glenn should be displayed.

Totally kidding...to each his own. That's what makes America great.  Every person has a voice and a vote. If you choose not to vote your voice will not be heard.

Tim just informed me walking out the door to work that he ate my last frozen pizza.

Talking about kicking a Hornet's Nest!!  He better be glad I bought a new jar of crunchy Peanut Butter last night.

Waking up tomorrow (today) and doing it all again.

Stay tuned, I also owe my brother in law "Goober Pyle" and will pay him back tomorrow night with a blog.

 "JUDY JUDY JUDY!"  ( Goober's inpersonation of Cary Grant on the Andy Griffith Show)

Til next  time...COTTON

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