Pretty Great Day!

My day started off with trying to clock in this morning but the computer was down. Took a couple of phone calls with our IT guy at  corporate and twenty minutes of me squatting on  the floor reading off numbers and verifying which lights were and were NOT on the router and modem. No fifty three year old woman likes to squat, I don't know how hot flashing Ethiopian women do it? Most of them don't even have a house much less a chair, it's brutally hot and they seem to always be squatting...not to mention all  those pesky flies.God bless 'em and Thank You Lord for letting me be an American.

Computer issues were finally fixed and I waited to hear from a friend of mine who was in town to call.

It's a crazy story (as most all of my stories are) so I'll back track a little for you.

Last year around this same time I did a blog about our dog Ham following my other two idiot dogs out of a hole in the fence at  the back of the yard one night. One of the idiots ran around and into  the garage to wait by  the kitchen door. The other one ran around to the front of the house and waited by  the front door. Ham simply got lost. Ham is blind and once out of the comfort zone of his back yard  wandered off. It took me a good bit of time to find him but finally did, a half mile from our house wandering down the middle of a busy road. I had to get out of my car and physically help him into the car because he couldn't see it but at least I found him. This was at  a time when we were barely scraping by. Tim had been out of work for well over a year and was working again but we were playing a tough game of "Catch up."

A guy who  reads my blog, who I have never met and lives in Miami contacted me and said my blog about Ham touched him and his wife as well.  His birthday was coming up and told his family all he wanted was money for his present. He sent me his birthday  money, kicking in some of his own to take Ham for an evaluation with a veterinary ophthalmologist. How nice was that?

Long story short (kinda) we got Ham up there to be seen, with several other people helping us with money  for dog food and gas to get us up to  the north side of Atlanta to see the vet.

Zach went with me and  the vet even had a picture of Ham's daddy in her office...she had done lens implants for Ham's dad a few years back.

All systems were go and had a foundation who would back us because we had been actively fund raising for Ham. The bad news is I  took Ham to our local low cost mobile vet to get his shots updated for surgery and he tested positive for heart worms. Not good.

Once again my (and Ham's) friends rallied around us and paid for the quick kill method of treatment which isn't cheap but Ham could live being blind but wouldn't survive with heart worms.

Three months and tons of love and help later he tested negative for heart  worms! We called  the vet back but they told us at this point considered eye surgery elective because they were worried he may not be able to survive the anesthesia required.

I called Auburn and we were on the board again when they suddenly lost their ophthalmologist.  I waited a month, no change. Then a friend of mine (another I've never met) told me about an ophthalmologist not twenty minutes away.  So  we are back in business. They may not be able to totally restore his vision but give him limited, blurry sight.  I am sure Ham would be as thrilled as me for that blessing.

I got an email the other day from my friend in Miami, he was coming to Atlanta for work and wanted to meet with me if he could. "Hell Yes" is what I should have written back. He and his wife had these awesome Thank You notes made up for me to mail to all the many people who have helped Ham on his journey. It had this picture on the front of them...

 This guy and his wife who I have never met have been so sweet to us and our pup. When I blogged about my feet freezing in the furniture store during the winter (we don't run heat) they mailed me a package of "Toasty Toes" for my shoes.  At Christmas they mailed us an adorable boxer ornament for our tree.( the one Ziggy tore down but the ornament survived!) You know...us dog lovers are pretty cray-cray about our pups. The out pouring of love for Ham has blown me away.  I sent out over twenty  Thank You notes to peeps who helped my pup and had to buy more. We truly wanted to help Ham and did what we could but sometimes you have to draw the line when it's the mortgage payment or vet bills. We  were threatened with foreclosure and only had five years and our house would be paid off.

These friends, some from high school, some from college, some from the church where I grew up, some from my blog and some who I didn't know at all, pulled my Ham through this and will always be eternally grateful for each and every one of them.

Back to today...Massey  thought it was creepy (she thinks a lot of things I do are creepy) I was meeting up with someone I had never met but knew he had helped Ham so she agreed to bring Ham up  to the furniture store for the meet and greet. My friend called to say he was on the way around elevenish this morning. It was a good day to come, Tuesday is the slowest retail day of the week. Let me also say this  guy  drove almost thirty minutes just to meet my dog!

Massey  arrived with Ham, took him out of the car  and he promptly took a dump on the wood chip covered island in front of the store. Good dog! I wish he could teach Ziggy  that trick.

My friend pulled in not ten minutes later. I told him I almost didn't recognize  him without his floral print shirt on and said he could go back to the car and get it if I wanted!  I knew immediately I loved this guy! We shared a long tight hug, the kind that means something.

He met Massey and he met Ham. We sat outside for a good thirty minutes. Massey was smart enough to bring Ham a water bowl and he loved all the attention. We chatted for a while, I left a couple of times to make a sale, had one customer comment on how handsome my boy was. While I was inside working the peeps, Massey and Jerry sat outside with Ham talking. When Massey went to take Ham home she turned  to Jerry and said "I'm going home and adding you  to my friends list!"

We took a couple of pics, this first one I took of the two new BFFL'S

Then I had Massey take a pic of me and him with  the Hammer...

After Massey and Ham left we went inside and talked for over a hour.  I told him a lot of stories about my struggling  debut as a furniture store manager and we had a few laughs. (I do  lot of things to laugh about) The time flew by and felt as if I was talking with a life long friend...which he is now!

He started to leave and we walked out front of the store. He told me he admired me for all we had been through and all we had accomplished. I told him it was because of people like him, friends and family. If he hadn't started the ball rolling, I wouldn't even know Ham had heart worms and by  now Ham would most probably be dead. Thanks to Jerry and his wife Dee Dee I have a huge network of people who love my pup and have given him his life back.

I got kinda emotional when Jerry  went to leave and just wanted him to know how much their kindness and generosity has meant. We hugged , I grabbed his bearded face and kissed him on the lips! He cracked up when I said "Don't tell your wife I kissed you on the lips but if you do tell her I will kiss her on her lips too when I finally meet her!"

We took a "Selfie" as Massey calls it when he left and the rest of my flew by.

I produced some numbers, sold and loaded out a lot of product but the thing I was most proud of was being able to thank someone in person for loving not only me but my family...which always includes my pups!

Look forward to someday getting down to Miami and meeting his sweet wife too.  Shout out to Dee Dee...Your husband made my day, and Ham's too!

Life is a journey. There's no map, simply guidelines. Live right, help others, love others and it will all be okay.

Today was the perfect example of how  true that last sentence was.

Til next time...COTTON

My Resume is Growing

It may not be my prettiest work but at least my precious newly air conditioned house remains cool with this nice patch job I did on the window shattered while cutting the back yard.

Not only am I a home window repairman, I can do auto repair as well. Zach's back window began with a small tear and within a month  the entire back window collapsed.  One of the cooks at work suggested sewing it up with a certain type fishing line he had that was really heavy duty. I went to Wal Mart and bought a pack of upholstery needles and borrowed the fishing line from my buddy at work. Three days, two buckets of sweat and six needles later I had the back window tight as a drum and didn't even leak when it rained like crazy. I was pretty proud of this job, especially when my neighbor Mr. Slow Lee watched me the entire time from his driveway saying it would never work. HA... Showed him!

I was on a roll and decided to add landscaper to my growing resume. Years ago before our fall from grace my yard was perfect every summer. I pulled weeds and had one of the nicest yards in the subdivision. Lately we've been lucky to just keep our house and paying work took precedence over yard work. The bushes had taken over our front yard and you couldn't even see our windows on the first floor.

Tim actually helped yesterday and trimmed back the bushes in front of the garage while I was at  the furniture store. The kids were amazed at his handiwork, he's not much of a yard guy. Years ago when I asked him to trim the bushes with the electric trimmer he cut through all three drop cords while trimming and so never asked him to do it again. This time he successfully made it without sawing through the drop  cord and I was very impressed with his work.

I got up this morning all pumped to finish the job. The bushes in front of our living room window were so tall you couldn't even tell we HAD windows. We had trees sprouting up behind the bushes,  poison ivy, weeds and unknown sticker plants (for lack of a better word) sprouting out in all different directions.

I got out the little aluminum ladder my Diddy  had given me for Christmas years ago and went to town. I cut as much  as I could from  the ground, then put the ladder in front of the bushes while Massey held it and leaned back against the ladder while reaching as high up as I could with the trimmer. The aluminum rungs were killing the back of my calf's but just kept on  cutting. Once I got to the higher parts, I had to hold on to the ladder behind me with one hand while swinging the trimmer as high up as I could with my other arm. I am sure at  least two of the neighbors across the street were laughing at me through their window or making a video tape of the crazy determined mighty might slinging away with one arm waving an electric trimmer around above her head.  Massey was a nervous wreck and thought I was going to fall off the ladder at least ten times.

Dang... I got through, and guess what? There was a HOUSE behind all the bushes! You used to not even be able to walk to my front door without catching yourself on the briars and bushes shooting out in all different directions. I had forgotten we had steps leading to the front door.

Four hours later, I weighed fives pounds less but hacked off at least a hundred pounds of  shrubbery and weeds and could actually see what my house looks like.

My sweet sister came over a couple of weeks ago and painted my front door for me. Next  she is going to paint my shutters the same color and my house will begin to resemble a house again.

I'm tackling my front island on Monday. I have gladiolas, irises , day lilies,  and brown eyed susans screaming for help from the weeds overtaking them as well.

My house may not look like a mansion, but is a mansion to me...just a neglected one.

I call our home "The house of hard knocks" but at least I have a house to name.

I went into work tonight after finishing yard work at four and clocked in by five. A co worker who I absolutely adore who reads my blog said to me  "You got a crazy life and nothing comes easy, always gets effed up but you always seem  make it happen."

You know, she is exactly correct. Life's NOT easy... but if you are a good person and try your best, good  things happen. Sometimes you have to be patient and and a lot of times you  have to pray.

As Zach once said to me when he was only about six years old "Momma, my prayer's came right."

My prayer's have "come right."

With so much help it's not even funny and determination, it's amazing what you can do.

I never get tired of saying it because it's so fantastically true...I am  blessed.

Til next  time...one tired COTTON.


PS  I will upload a picture tomorrow of the bruises on the back of my legs from leaning against the ladder. I call them victory marks!

Three More Days

Looks like not only am I rounding the corner but almost there, in many ways.  Number one we kept our house,  not even Evander Holyfield managed to win that fight. I have a great job and Tim has a pretty good job. We are seriously close to being caught up to being current...another huge mile marker.

I almost burned myself out at work but after my meltdown on Father's Day, they made me cut back and I am grateful they did. I still loved my job but was killing MYSELF. We have a new server who is the younger old "Me." He works the ten and eleven shifts I used to work and I cut back to seven or eight. Last week was the slowest week in the restaurant year and the owner put it to me this way. "It's going to be a slow week. You can let me schedule you the same or take some shifts off  while it's not busy." He's a good man. He's a crazy man but a good one. It wasn't like it was the holiday season and I would be missing golden shifts so I agreed and worked five shifts. It was like a vacation. I cooked almost every night, got parts of the house dusted (baby steps) got some things around the house fixed and did lots of yard work.

It also gave me time to bond with our new puppy, Ziggy. He is one hot mess! I've needed to have my carpets cleaned for quite some time but  think we have sprayed every spot of carpet we have with Resolve carpet cleaner and scrubbed it with a dirty bath towel out of the hamper.  He's learning and I'm remembering how hard it is to house train a puppy. If he wasn't so stinking cute  I'd kill him. (totally kidding)

He's just so happy all the time. People diagnosed with depression should be prescribed to have a twelve week old boxer puppy. He gets excited when you just walk in a room. He gets excited when you cough or sneeze.  He lopes everywhere he goes on his tiny long legs yet can just as easily fall asleep  in ten seconds and be snoring in fifteen. It cracks me up the way he seems so happy with his boxer smile and the way he moves his head around like Ray Charles when you are talking to him.  He's been a good addition.

The older two dogs were hard sells but both love the little goofball now. Ham and Ziggy  play out back at night endlessly when I am reading on  the back deck. Charlie loved him from  the get go but  after the fight he had with Ham,  has kinda shied away from letting Ziggy bite on his jowls. (the ones Ham ripped apart)

We got Zig from a co worker of mine. He's AKC registered. I wanted one of the pups right off the bat when they were born but knew I couldn't spend money on a new dog. I'm a huge dog lover but I am also a wife and mother. First things first.

Lucky for me, they sold several right off the bat for almost 4 bills a piece. Lucky for me also, they have a baby learning to crawl, the sire and dame still there and  four pups left. She knows how much I love boxers and finally said "Please come get one." I told her to pick out the one she didn't think would be her top seller and Massey would put the rest on Craig's List, complete with pics.

So she brought us Ziggy.

She knew I had two other males and chose the most laid back pup she thought would do well with my idiots. She done good. She said she had called him her little "Alien" because his eyes were wide apart and he has that huge knot on top of his head. She's right... but we love our little ET.

The kids have been really helping me out around the house as well and helped more than they will ever know. It's nice to come home and see the dishwasher unloaded and hear the dryer going. I came home last night and the bottom two floors of the house were vacuumed. Granted it's not Momma standards but I look at it this way, my job's halfway done.

Leaving in three days for vacation. Kinda scared...my job means clocking in and bringing home a pay check. I'm not clocking in for seven days and it has me worried. I've been saving money all week but only half way to my goal. I have two more shifts to bank big. I'm gonna rely on Karma and God to make it happen. I am taking every thing from the house I possibly can...condiments, saran wrap, napkins, toilet paper and all the food I can. Zach's staying here and I feel bad about not only leaving him but taking all his staples. He'll be fine (I hope) and gets paid on Tuesday.

I am bound and determined to make this trip and enjoy it.

Had a horrible start to my day. Last night I fell asleep on the sofa in the living room, waiting for the storms that never came...watching the weather channel.

I woke this morning bundled under a comforter,  on my back with my mouth wide open to  the sound of our phone ringing. Tim walked to the top of the stairs and said "It's for you." I turned on the TV and saw it was 10:56. I was supposed to be at work at 10:30.

I bolted into action, showered and got to work in under twenty five minutes. Thank the Lord they weren't busy and once again dodged a bullet. Had a great lunch shift and got home in time for a thirty minute siesta.

Two more shifts  to go  and I have an entire week to myself. Going to St. Augustine where my crazy mother in law and two brother in laws live  and really looking forward to it.

Packing up the peanut butter and crackers and every thing else I can take without leaving Zach totally destitute and giving myself a break from the past three years. We've invited my sister,  her hub and my brother to come down but they will most probs stay here and have a party because their needy sister is gone.

You know what? So many people have been so good to me the past three years...if you are near St. Augustine this next week, feel free to stop by. You can lay on the beach and eat crackers with us.

Til next time...turning in now so I don't oversleep again...COTTON

Had a "ME" Night

 I don't get out much unless it is to work, the high school, bank or the grocery store. Tonight I met former co workers at Mama Lucia's for a Holiday gathering. The above photo is Massey with one of my favorite former co workers who looks so much like Massey it scares me. They both have that wild curly hair  they always try to pin down (not working) and those wide faces. When I started working at the Western Sizzler back in 1998 (When Massey was a toddler) people used to think she was Massey's mom. Looking at pictures of them together I can see why!

I booked us a room at Mama Lucia's and we all got together for the best  three hours I have had in a while.

 Of course the food was fabulous. The wine even better and the company outstanding!

 These were the peeps I worked with WAY BACK WHEN...when it was fun to work at Western Sizzler.

I think only one of them works there now, which should tell you something about working for corporate.

I work like a demon but it is TOTALLY my decision to do so. Two years ago Tim and I were bringing in six figures a years. We bottomed out when Tim lost his job and fell into bankruptcy when I lost mine.

We have scraped, kited and been blessed with amazing help from family friends and even strangers we are almost there, we are on the cusp. We can breathe and answer the phone again.
I was pretty pissed at my former job for firing me, actually I still am...and will be for at least the next  ten years.
Tonight I met my former co workers for a Holiday dinner at my new place of employment for some of the best food and drink you could have. We laughed and remembered old times...the GOOD times.

My boss gave us all free appetizers and the meal was outstanding...the company even better.

You know, I  had a couple of tough years but when you are fifty one, that is a blip on the screen in the grand scheme of life.  I had so many friends tonight tell me that I was doing it right. Keep going, don't look back...there is nothing you can do about the past, you can only control your future.

My future will be great. Heck give me another year and maybe I can also solve the whole "Hot Flash" thing because it is driving me insane. When I was younger hot and sweaty meant great sex...now it means "Turn the  ceiling fan on."

I take maybe one day off a month (maybe two) but tonight was one that made me smile, made me happy and made me feel like I was  young again.

It is nights like this that make it all worth while...I felt young and pretty (all dressed up) and spent the night with peeps that I love.
Thank you PEEPS for making me feel loved, I needed that!

Til next time..Contented COTTON

It's Hard to Keep Up When You're Old...But I Try!

Just got home from work and it was another good shift. Everyone drank wine and most all ordered appetizers and even a few desserts...that always helps my cause!

The last two shifts have helped me get back on track. In my world that means back in the black in my checking account. Red must be my favorite color because that's where I spend most of my time.

I was at the bar at work tonight and one of the regulars was talking about trying to access an  account he rarely used and said after answering his security question was told his answer was wrong. He said he tried again and the answer was wrong again.

You know me, I piped right in "I know what you mean, I logged into my checking account today and they told me my answer was wrong when I KNOW it was right. After two tries I logged out of FireFox and went back in on Internet Explorer and got right into my account with the same exact security question answer...I think someone was trying to hack me."

Never one to be ashamed of small steps forward I said "Hey... I have $1.41 in that account and don't think I'm not keeping a close eye on it!" He laughed,  thinking I was being funny when in fact I was sorta bragging. It's taken me over a week to get my balance up to $1.41 and I was feeling pretty good about it.

Small steps are better than NO steps and I'll take what I can get. It's getting better every day and before you know it, BLACK will be MY permanent status in the banking world. I know my bank will be pissed, I've probably built them two new branches with my NSF fees and should be thrown a party by the evil bankers that shove the big check through first so all the little ones bounce too.

On another note, the heat has been oppressive here in the south the past two days. Granted I am fifty one and break into a sweat at two in the morning while sleeping under a ceiling fan on high in a house that is air conditioned and has the thermostat set to seventy seven. Before I started having hot flashes the thermostat never went below seventy eight but "A menopausal woman's gotta do what a menopausal woman's gotta do!"

I  thought child birth was rough...that was a walk in the park on a nice breezy day compared to what my body is going through now. Thank God I'm still skinny...at least being in the red for two years is good for something. I couldn't imagine being a big girl going through the change...it must be absolutely horrible!

At work I wear long black pants and a three  quarter length shirt, covered by a work apron. I start sweating the moment I walk out of my house and don't stop til I get back home and peel off my pants socks and shoes and slide into my flip flops and daisy dukes with a tank top (my daily summer outfit.)

At work the other day I asked the owner why we couldn't wear skirts and he said we could. Dang...I must have missed THAT employee meeting!

 The next day Massey and I went to Ross Dress For Less, which she and I call Ross Mess For Less. It's a great place for bargain shopping but everything is mis- sized misplaced and it's like a hunt to find something without an OBVIOUS flaw but if you spend time you save a bundle and look pretty good unless you run into Paris Hilton on the street.

Massey found me a skirt for six bucks that was labeled a size five but fit my size zero body perfectly and was the exact  length of my work apron. "BAM!"

I am already tan enough from the hours I spend doing yard work to not have to wear hose but on the downside now I had to shave my legs. When I was younger I shaved my legs every day. Now I make myself feel better by thinking that the prickly hairs help keep my socks up...nobody likes having to hike their socks up every fifteen minutes and mine stayed up as long  I had them on, even if they were my husband's and way too big.

I walked into work with my skirt on and it was like an entirely new world. Of course I got a couple of stares from the kitchen help but I think they were just jealous. Where I stand in the kitchen is ninety degrees. The other side of the line where they cook is at least a hundred and twenty. Sucks for them... but it is incredibly cooler for me. I told the owner I felt so good I didn't think I needed ANY days off now...I could work seven days a week in this new outfit. If he could just lower the lights in the dining room where my varicose veins  didn't show so bad I might even make better tips!

In life you have to take the good with the bad. In life you have to make the best of the cards you are dealt. In life you have to go with the flow or be swept into the drain. In life you have to make lemonade with the lemons thrown your way and be grateful for the love you receive and  love  too often taken for granted.

One thing I HAVE learned is to  remember... ALWAYS remember your life is a heck of a lot better than millions and millions of other's.

Count your blessings, name them one by one and you will see what The Lord has done.

 He's done a bunch for me and I feel pretty good about the strides I am making as well.

Til next time...COTTON in a skirt!

Just a Glimpse...

Here's a glimpse of me "Resting my eyes" between shifts at the last competition...and what a glorious rest it was! I never knew how comfy a hard plastic bleacher in a gym could be even with Teddy the Tyrant booming out criticism and corrections. He sounded like a Sugar Plum to me and sent me into a thirty minute, much needed sweet coma. I chose the behind shot...the other one looked like an ninety year old woman sleeping in a hall of the nursing home unattended.



At least I still have a twenty year old "Booty."











The uniforms were ready for this past competition and looked FANTASTIC. They go great with the theme of the show.














Of course I chose Massey for the close up...at least I know her mom doesn't mind me using her close up in my blog!






I used a few other kids to show the enormous size of the sets.





Behind the guard to the left is a pic of ONE of the four swing sets that are put up and taken down before and after each show in under two minutes.










In the background of this shot you can see three of the FIVE slides that are put together and taken down again as well.













It's incredible what these Props people do. It's also incredible that they were desperate enough to let me be part of the team!



It's even more incredible what this team of up and coming young adults can do when they put aside peer pressure, pettiness and pride.



They are a championship team, have been called that by judges and will always be champions to me.



When you are fifty like me and had some recent hard knocks, it's very comforting to still be able to remember AND experience those wonderful ( back then from dramatic to horrific) years and know that in a few more short ones YOUR child will realize ...in the blink of an eye, high school will be over and end up being a tiny blip on the huge radar of life .



I am so lucky to have this wonderful connection to youth and be able to enjoy it with not only my daughter but 75 of her...now MY closest friends.

Those four years did end up to be a blip...but in hindsight, it was a pretty FUN blip.



Where can I sign up for a "Do Over?"



Til next Time....COTTON

PS As always click on the pics for larger view...except for my Butt shot.

If Life is a Test...I Didn't Study Hard Enough

A friend of mine used to have a tee shirt like this and I always loved it...of course that was before the big "Cotton Crash" of 2009.

In the last year I have learned more lessons about life that I ever thought were possible. I have learned how to send prayers up quicker than texting with "word" and learned how to patiently wait for answers seemingly coming "snail mail."

I have learned that the world IS round and "what comes around goes around" is not a saying but a fact of life.

I have learned that people seem to enjoy me pouring my heart out for them to read and that empathy can be very consoling .

I have learned that Prayer is an often under rated tool by many.

I have learned that a lot of things my Mother said to me in my youth weren't as stupid as I thought they were when she said them.

"The more you give, the more you get."

"The older you get, the smarter I will seem."

"You don't have to say you love me, I know you do."

The tide seems to be changing...slowly but surely.

I received a comment about one of my blogs today and she said that she tries not to read my blog daily because she gets sucked into my life. She meant it in a nice way and went on to say that I have taught her to have a sense of humor no matter what happens ...it can't hurt and often helps.

If having a sense of humor helps, I oughta be a millionaire. I'm not, but I am a person that can laugh at myself and my circumstances. Sometimes if you don't laugh you'll break down and cry... crying makes my eyes and face all puffy and really isn't my best look. I am already fifty and quickly going gray...puffiness in the facial area isn't going to get the bills paid and if I am going to be broke, it will be with a smile and a sense of humor.

I don't think the evil monster "Wells Fargo" can deny our loan modification, stipulating that I was "too funny" for the program. If they do, I'll just sue them for "humor bias" and hire Wanda Sykes to represent me.

Life appears to be getting back to normal. We're still late on a lot of things...but as my Mother ALSO said "Better late than never."

My husband still sweats every problem, call and letter.

A BIG thank you goes out to him for being the 'Realist' leaving me to be the comedic relief.

HEY! We're a team..what can I say?

What IS important is that we ARE a team. I've been with Tim since I was 28 years old. We have been through some rough times and granted this has been the "MO FO" of them all. But we are still together, our kids are healthy and driving us nuts (that means they are normal) and have made it this far and discovered how much we are loved.

It may sound sappy...it may sound weird, but what comes to my mind is the song from "The Sound of Music." Massey, my sister and I know ALL the words to the entire soundtrack and could put on a play for you if we COULD sing. Okay, Massey CAN sing..but I don't think she'd get on board.

This sums up how I feel about the past year. It tells you that if I hadn't had the parents I had, if I hadn't been raised in a wonderful home environment...I wouldn't be the person I am today and wouldn't have the blessings of love coming at me from so many directions and so many hearts.

"Perhaps I had a wicked childhood

Perhaps I had a miserable youth

But somewhere in my wicked, miserable past

There must have been a moment of truth.

For here you are, standing there loving me

Whether or not you should.

So somewhere in my youth or childhood

I must have done something good.

Nothing comes from nothing

Nothing ever could.

So somewhere in my youth or childhood

I must have done something good."

I am blessed with a wicked sense of humor...without it I would had given up months ago. My God, my family and my friends and even readers have seen me safely to the other shore. It's a rocky shore... but a place where we can regain our footing and begin to rebuild, regroup and hope to one day pay forward.

I have decided to go viral with my blog...maybe upload it to Youtube. Now you can not only read my drivel but see me reading it aloud...I promise NOT to sing!

Til next time...COTTON

100% Restored Mentally and Back Up to 100 Pounds ...

In the words of my fourteen year old daughter...OMG. In the words of her mother "Holy %$@& ."

We arrived in Destin after cruising out from home only to get four miles from home when the car made a funky sound that made Massey and I look at each other and say "Maybe it was a bump in the road."



Turns out it wasn't a bump in the road but a bump in the engine. The engine light came on like a beacon saying "Ha Ha...you THOUGHT you were going on a trip."



We turned the car back and went to the only mechanic I know...the guy that put on my new tires. He bumped us ahead of every one of the dozen or so people sitting in his lobby and put a mechanic right on it. Thirty minutes later he said "You needed new plugs and still have an o2 sensor out but you are good to go for your trip."


I asked him how much I owed him and he said $172. I threw up in my mouth a little bit and asked him if I could post date a check? He said I could put any date I wanted... I tried to figure out what would be a year from now but figured two weeks would be good. He was so nice and this is the main reason that I always go to him.



We jumped back into the car and headed off...two hours behind schedule but feeling pretty good.



I got my directions from Google... they led us through every PO DUNK town there was in south Georgia and a couple of even smaller ones in Alabama if you can believe there are smaller ones than Prattville and I think one of them was called Mayberry Jr.



Six hours later we pulled up in front of a mansion (in our minds) and I told Massey not to get excited I might be lost again.



BINGO...for once Mama had it right and we had both hit the jack pot!



Right across from the beach...gated community, a house that I have dreamed of having... the kind I thought maybe Kevin Costner would somehow give me when he saw one of my facebook posts and say "This is a liberal gal that I need to help out."



BINGO...Me and Massey had just hit the big time!



We pulled into the drive and it was an instant "Nirvana" experience.

My dear friend from high school welcomed us with open 'gates' and Massey and I began a weekend of healing that I have needed for over a year.

Massey had asked me on the way down what the sleeping arrangements would be and I told her we would most likey be bunking together.

We arrived to have a tour of the mansion (in our minds)...and when Del showed us the first bedroom Massey said "Yes...I want this room." I said I was fine with that when my friend said "Okay, that means you have THIS bedroom, Kelly."

I was led to a room that I never wanted to leave. A huge suite with my own balcony my own bath and a bed that must have been the bed that Goldi Locks finally settled into. I have never felt a softer or fluffier bed. I laid down and immediately knew I would never want to get up.

I slept like a princess and woke to the smell of breakfast and Massey sitting on my comfy bed. She said her hair was wet but I encouraged her to just sink into my bed...one that you would never think of rising from unless there was a hurricane or unless my friend from high school said a tornado was headed straight for the master suite. If it hit downstairs I could still watch on CNN and hope for the best. 700 count thread sheets VS a storm...I'll take my chances She is lucky I didn't drive a truck down because that mattress would have been loaded in the bed of my truck before they ever got up and I would have slunk away from Destin with the greatest mattress on earth and consider it a swap out for feeding us for three days.

I didn't have a truck so I went downstairs to eat a huge breakfast and Massey and I were treated to a day on the beach like we were extras on a "Baywatch" shoot. They had a cart that held all the chairs towels and floats, we carried a cooler with a radio installed in the front, they had a huge canopy to sit under (Granted it was UGA...but a girl can suffer when she has to.)

We spent the day at the beach. I got burned to a crisp and we loaded it all back up and went home to a meal fit for Emeril.

Woke up the next day (a little too early for me in my new favorite bed) and did it all again.

We went out to dinner that night and I ate so much that I thought I would throw up, the shrimp was so good that it felt like a crime to leave a tail untouched and I was thrilled to be headed back to my feather bed.

Beach again the next day...The waves looked like they were rolling in from Maui. My friend and I went out to cool down and got pounded to death. When I saw my six foot tall friend go under the first time I knew my little butt was about to get creamed.

We laughed, we panted and we made it out alive with our suits filled with sea weed and our lungs looking for help.

Came home to another excellent meal...Crab cakes, Grouper with a mango salsa...fresh asparagus and garlic mashed potatoes. Elllen even threw in a pomegranate martini that just screamed "Take me back to my feather bed." To top it off we had Creme Brulee..."Geez...do these people even know that I ALREADY don't want to leave?"

The first day we joined a "hands across the sand" protest on the beach where you stood by the shore for five minutes side by side...incredible how many lazy people wouldn't get out of their chair for five minutes to show support for the Gulf. It made me embarassed for them but grateful for the fact that it bothered my fourteen year old daughter.

It was an amazing weekend...it was a weekend I have needed for over a year...it was an eye opening experience that I have people that love me and want to help me. I have friends that care about me and show me the true meaning of friendship.

Massey was blown away by the love and care these women showed us. I was blown away by the fact that after 30 years...my friend seemed to love me even more.

Enjoy the pics of their dogs (you know what a dog lover I am) enjoy the pics of their house and the pics of our trips. Enjoy and think about the pics of all of us standing hand to hand protesting the spill.

In my opinion the fisherman should go out to the contaminated waters...catch all the contaminated shrimp, fish and oysters they can and BP should pay them fair market value for their catch and relocate all wildlife that remains to a safe location.

Til next time ...COTTON

Be sure to click on the pics and be sure to click on the video... It was the most amazing time I have had in YEARS.

Can't wait to go back (Shhh...don't tell THEM)

Getting Used to This "Day Off" Thing

For almost 13 years I worked at LEAST six days a week. For the first seven years I was at Longhorn I worked seven days a week. Monday through Friday at the elementary school my younger two attended and Friday, Saturday and Sunday at Longhorn.

Having this new job is like getting a reprieve on my life expectancy.

I still work six shifts a week but have two entire days off to myself. I can work in the yards, go places with my kids or do absolutely nothing.

Work was slow tonight and I got off right after 9:30.I didn't break the bank tonight but working in such a refreshing atmosphere sometimes makes me feel like I should be paying THEM.

The owners are nice to me, the cooks are nice...dishwashers, ditto. Every one from the front of the house to the back of the house is a pleasure to work with and I am finally feeling like I fit in.

Being in debt for a year will take some time to recover from, but at least I am recovering in a friendly environment and actually LIKE going into work.

The customers are even nicer. I know that sounds crazy but it's true. It's a different clientele we have (a MUCH better one) and the pace is slower and more of a dining experience than a "Dinner."

I have learned more about wines than I ever thought I would and learn something new every shift...even if it is just a good joke!

Why I didn't leave the big corporation thing years ago seems stupid to me now. I don't mean to say it is all roses at the new place. Sometimes tensions run high, it gets busy and nerves are on edge but in the end we are a team. The other place was more like a competition..."let's see who gets to keep their job today."

At my old job I worked with so many lazy people that I spent half my time doing other people's work just so things would run a little bit smoother. Now I am in a place where I can focus on MY job and know that others are doing the same. At my old job managers were so busy that they never noticed the lazy people but just expected the hard workers to make it all happen. At my new job, my managers are the owners and see EVERYTHING , EVERYBODY and will call you out in a New York minute if you aren't pulling your weight. That's the main reason it all runs so smoothly. They aren't worried about crunching the numbers or getting people off the time clock...they are worried about the guests and making every attempt to do what ever it takes to give every guest the ultimate dining experience.

As far as my home life...actually haven't had anything wacky happen in a day or two (I must be due.)

Tim and I are going to Consumer Credit Counseling to try and get some bills paid off. When the axe fell, we hung onto the house and the utilities but didn't even consider paying credit cards first. Now the interest rates have sky rocketed and even though we haven't charged anything in over a year it is out of control.

After a while you get used to when to pick up the phone and when NOT to. Even the kids will say "It's Florence, Kentucky...don't pick up!" That would be Capitol One.

DFS Is Dell Financial services. We bought Massey a lap top for Christmas two years ago and were paying it off nicely ...when the axe fell. Be realistic...am I going to make my mortgage or pay Dell? Now I owe them enough that I should have a lap top in every room in the house.

"It's DFS, Don't pick up!"

Heck, I've even gotten to where I will say "It's Children's Miracle Network...Don't pick up!"

Not that I don't want to help them but afraid I would end up asking them to add my kid's names to THEIR list!

I am not a person that squanders money away...but a person that knows her limitations and priorities. Number one...keep a roof over our heads. Number two...try to have lights and water in the roof over our heads. Number three...food on the table. Number four...pay my debts off as soon as I reasonably can.

For months Tim had no income. Now we both have decent jobs that both have bright futures. Before you know it, we'll be answering the phone again!

With the help of family, friends and even strangers we have been able to keep our house, had food to eat and been given breathing room. I owe so many people thanks and have tried to pay it forward as much as I can at this point in time. Lucky for us we only have two credit cards to pay off and many friends that have helped us out financially and personally. I feel my personal debt is quite bigger than my credit card debt...and since these people obviously love me, maybe they won't jack up my interest rate!

Thanks to my friends and family...I am in a good place now. Thanks to our new jobs we have the means to start digging out.

Having all of this happen to us used to be a weight on my already bony shoulders. Now I feel the sweet breeze of friendship and can smell the promise of a much brighter tomorrow. There are so many guard moms that have taken Massey under their wing and made sure she never felt like an outsider. Not only that, they put groceries in my kitchen when I couldn't...brought my girl home from competitions or practice when I was at work or just let her stay the night at their house.

Friendship is an amazing and wonderful gift ... one that I cherish and never take lightly.

I am a fifty year old woman who has learned more about life and friendship in the past year than I have the entire half century I have been alive.

God is good...family and friends are a close second.

Tomorrow is Massey's final chorus concert (for the year.) A day off for me...one to spend the day in the yard and the night with my girl. Thursday is my next day off...Massey's band banquet is THAT night. Last year was the first band banquet I attended and was blown away. The program she is in (color guard) is part of the amazing band program at East Coweta. The banquet is an eye opening experience. A great band director who genuinely loves these kids and it shows. The kids are amazing. They are an eclectic group within themselves...jocks, nerds, fat, skinny, popular, unpopular, even some in wheel chairs...but all have a common bond. They are a team...they are ECHS Marching Indians and if you ask me, they are one heckuva Tribe.

So life has thrown me some curves.

I have also been thrown many life lines and have grabbed onto them for dear life.

Thank you family, thank you friends and thank you strangers. The help was MUCH needed and will remain one of the things I will ALWAYS be grateful for...people loving me and people loving my kids.

I am a lucky woman. I am a woman who saw nothing but despair at one point...and like a beacon...you all showed me the way.

Hugs from the heart...COTTON

More God Bubbles...

That's me in the middle and all my problems trying to crash the party.

The thing is, I am so surrounded by love and care that it makes it difficult NOT to smile. Massey and one of her best friends have a "God Bubble" theory (see past post). When you surround yourself with God you are in a God Bubble. When you do for others that Bubble grows bigger to encompass them as well. As you love more, the bubble continues to grow.

My family is currently floating like a HUGE God Bubble and there is no better place to be.

I got a lot done today before I went to work.

Made the rounds, Dept. of Labor...I'm not sure they understand the significance of needing unemployment insurance. I filed over two weeks ago and have yet to receive a payment. The lady told me it was still in the process stage and to wait another week and come back if I hadn't received a check. At least it hasn't been denied so I guess I may still get some help.

Next was DFACS...another office that I wait in line semi patiently to speak as quietly as I can to the clerk. Not that it should really matter, we're all there for the same reason. They needed "One more pay stub" and I finally found it on Saturday when I cleaned out the garage. I never saved my pay stubs because I never actually got a check. Not knowing my crappy manager was going to fire me I had thrown it in a trash can in the garage. Once DFACS needed it I was almost sure it was long gone but my God Bubble had left it for me to find and now THINK I have turned in all the paper work I need to get assistance.

Next to the post office to mail off the kid's insurance payment since it needs to be there "Yesterday." Massey was with me and once again the government kept up it's snail slow movement and it seemed to take forever to hear "Next in line."

There was an old codger behind us who turned around in line to strike up a conversation with the guy behind him.

I swear he sounded like he had a microphone in his hand. I didn't turn around to look, like the two women in front of me did. The stare Massey gave me inclined me to just stare straight ahead as I cracked up at what I was hearing.

First off, Mr. Microphone talked VERY loudly about how a stamp used to cost three cents and what are they doing with all that money anyway? Then he commented on the back room you could see."Lookit all them buggies filled with mail , how they know where its all supposed to go?...it's a wonder my mail don't end up in China." He veered off into a one man conversation about a hotel that burned down in downtown Atlanta...Winecoff or something like (it IS Winecoff...my cousin told me via email, Thanks, Neal) that and immediately started another thread of conversation about how his buddy could surely shoot some pool...never seen the likes of a man that could clear a table like he did.

I finally HAD to turn around, (with Massey GLARING at my back) and saw that this ole codger was speaking to a young Asian man that appeared to not understand one word that this old gentleman was saying but had a very pleasant look on his face which obviously encouraged the older man.

The older man's voice never got quieter or stopped...every person in that line (now 15 deep) was listening to this man and probably thinking the same thing I was...His wife probably sends him out on errands just to give her own ears a rest.

It was the highlight of my morning! I LOVE senior citizens, especially ones like this man. He is in his late eighties, no one has taken his driver's license away and "Dadgummit" he'll talk to whoever he wants to, whether they talk back or not! Massey commented on him having on old jeans and holes in the back of his shirt. I thought to myself he probably told his wife (at length) how he needed to change before he went out because you never know who you might run into or see or what could happen. She probably said "YOU LOOK FINE..just go on and get."

Then it was time to take Massey to practice and go home to get ready for work.

I had my very first busy night!!! I was so proud of myself. I faked what I didn't know, only had five tables and walked out with seventy dollars.

Came home from work to find one of my friends had stocked my cabinets and refrigerator with all kinds of groceries. They not only bring Massey home from practice for me...they bring home food to feed my family.

My God Bubble is BURSTING!!

I am back on the path but still have friends helping me make the climb much easier.

The smiles surely outweigh the frowns.

I am one lucky woman.

Til next time... ONE HAPPY COTTON

A New Year...Is That You I See ?

A New Year has arrived...Thank the Lord.

The old year is behind me, like the dimples on the back of my thighs....and just as easily forgotten.

My husband is working three part time jobs and for some unknown reason I have hung on to my one.

The weather is so cold that I think my nipples may be permanently hard and my feet may never warm up again.

I have been sick for the last four months but after sleeping twelve hours on Friday and fourteen on Saturday I felt much better today when I went to work. It is true what they say about sleep helping... maybe a doctor visit might help but I feel 100% better and know now that I HAVE to take care of myself before I can expect to be able to take care of my family.

That dastardly year had gone away and I feel relief in the air. I have been blessed beyond my wildest imagination by friends and family and owe more than Bernie Madoff does to all of them (slight exaggeration.)

WE MADE IT !!!

2010 will be a new start...a new year and a new path to go down. I look forward to it with optimism and hope. I look forward to it because so many people have helped us through the last year and have made the hope possible.

All I ask for is for is for God to turn the heat back on in the South....my nipples are embarrassingly small !

I hope that every one is blessed to have wonderful family and friends...they are what get you through times of desperation and despair. If you don't have that advantage, be sure to call out for help...someone will be your Angel....it may even be me, and I will do my best to help you any way I can.

Til next time....a STRONGER Cotton

So Excited...

Tomorrow my girl is marching in the Christmas parade in downtown Atlanta and I am so excited. I am more excited about the forecast for sleet and snow (NOT.)

She has been at school all day and after she stayed to help paint the tarp for their winter guard program (here we go again.) I took her some dinner to the school around five and was so relieved that she wanted to go home and spend the night with "Tiffi" another guard girl. That means HER parents will take Massey to the school at 8 and I can wait to leave for the parade which starts at 10.

Granted that only gives me an extra thirty minutes in bed.. but I 'll Take it!

When I went to the school tonight to take her dinner I mentioned the forecast and asked if she minded if I stayed home and watched it on TV. Her face said it all. I have my cam corder charging and have gas in my car to go and brave the elements. If she can march down Peachtree Street in that slinky outfit I can surely be there in my winter coat hat and gloves filming her as the prettiest girl in the East Coweta Band marches by.

My husband just left for work and I said that Massey really wanted me there tomorrow. He said "Why don't you take Marta?" Yeah he can be a smart ass.

No dis on Marta, I just don't travel it enough to even know where to get off or when to scream for help. (see previous post.)

I talked to Tim and he told me exactly where to get off the interstate and I can park in a garage see the parade, film Massey and hopefully be safely back home by 2:00.

The last time I went to see the parade was when Massey was six years old , I took her and my next door husband's daughter.

Here we are eight years later and my girl is MARCHING IN THE PARADE.

It has been a tough year, but for my girl it has been a good year and to me that is all that matters. Look for me on the sidelines as the parade goes by. I will be the one holding a sign saying "Will work for Warmth."

Love my girl, love my entire family and I am really blessed..I really mean that. I am lucky...just going through a rough spot and tired of thinking of that. I am focusing now on how truly lucky I am and how many people love me. My new mantra is "Pay It Forward."

Merry Christmas to all of my friends and fanily...without you I wouldn't even be here to post.

OMG..click on these pictures!

TEN...NINE...EIGHT...SEVEN...SIX...

Where has the year gone?

It seems like last week the kids were out on spring break!!

Tomorrow is New Year's Eve...another year will be tucked under our belt and we will forge into 2009.

I feel a great year coming... a new President (I think a wise choice) and a year full of new resolutions and opportunities.

I have already made quite a few resolutions and hope that I can make at least a few of them a reality.

I want to be a more understanding person and a better mother and wife.

I want to be more patient with my husband...who is as laid back as I am hyper.

Looking over the past year, I have been blessed more than I deserve. I have three wonderful children, who wear me out on a daily basis although I couldn't imagine my life without them.

I have a wonderful job, with bosses that respect and appreciate me (a HUGE plus) and I have customers that seem to genuinely like me being their server and take tremendous care of me every time they come into our store.

I work with an eclectic bunch of goof balls that I love, admire and make fun of on a daily basis. I am 48...most of them are in their early twenties (which makes them extremely easy to pick on).

If they knew what this ole gal knows now...they could all change the course of their lives and save themselves a ton a heartache, money , fines and probation!

My kids are growing up WAY too rapidly, and it leaves me opened mouthed...wondering where the last 22 years have gone?!

My brother in law survived open heart surgery..my sister survived nursing him back to health( A greater feat if you ask me).

My husband has started his own trucking business and survived thus far in this terrible economy.

Our house is another year closer to being paid off (Thank You 15 year mortgage).

Although I am a year closer to turning fifty...I feel just as good as I did when I was 25... except for the carpel tunnel, the bad knee , back aches and the ever growing gray hair and crows feet!

But HEY!! I am here, I am healthy (sorta) living in a great neighborhood with my next door husband close by for repairs and my retired neighbors on the other side always ready for a thirty minute chat any time they catch you before you shut the garage door (That will be me one day...I am sure)!!

Enjoy your last day of 2008 and let's kiss this disastrous year goodbye and welcome 2009 with the optimism and hope that we need.

Thank you all for being readers of my drivel and for taking time to stop and listen to my stories, opinions and rants!!

I wish only the best and most for you and yours in the coming year...and keep on reading...

Til NEXT year....COTTON