A Day Off... With My Kids

Believe it or not I have TWO days off this week. I had yesterday off (You know...the greatest day I've had in months) and I worked tonight. I have tomorrow off and finally got Massey an appointment with the physical therapist at Children's Healthcare in downtown Atlanta for her knee.


I have been so blessed with the government help I have recently received I decided to use that Peachcare plan I have the kids on to finally get her some help for her knee that has been bothering her for months.

The thing about Massey is that she is so dramatic I never know when it's real or just her earning another academy award for "Best Actress in a dramatic role." Her nickname on the Guard is even "Drama" and that pretty much sums her up.

I poo-pooed it for a while but when she came down with strep a couple of months back and Tim took her to the doctor they examined her knee as well and said she needed physical therapy. GO FIGURE...the little stinker was legit with her complaints!

The first time she told me she needed glasses I took her to "Claire's" and bought her some clear glasses just figuring she wanted to have some glasses to look all "Glamorous" and she would be satisfied. When I took her for a sports physical when she wanted to try out for the middle school track team she flunked her eye test and I felt like "Worst Mother of the Year."

You never know with girls...they are either on top of the world or drowning in despair.

The closest place to take her is Atlanta in North Druid Hills...45 miles from home.

I have done a lot for Massey, granted she makes great grades ...is really a sweet girl but with our misfortunes of late I feel I have neglected Zach .

He will NOT allow me to buy clothes for him and would rather go to school buck naked than to wear clothes I pick out for him. He has one pair of cords that he likes and several tee shirts that I bought him two years ago off "InterPunk.com" and a Ramones hoodie that my brother bought him for Christmas last year.

Every morning I say "Zach, get up and put on your uniform...it's time for school."

When he was younger (probably 8, my sister was taking him somewhere in her car when they passed a private school just letting out. He made the comment to my sister as they drove by...'Do they wear the same costumes every day?"

That's what Zach wears every day of the week...his costume and I bet the teachers wonder how poor his parents are that he owns one pair of pants and three tee shirts that all look alike.

So tomorrow we are all headed to Atlanta together.

We will take Massey for knee therapy and Zach for fashion therapy.

Zach is a different kid...DEFINITELY.

He marches to the beat of a different drum...sometimes I even wonder if it IS a drum.

I came home from work tonight and googled thrift stores in Little Five Points in Atlanta. If any one is a " LittleFive" guy, Zach is. He has never been there, but it is place that he will probably see and say to himself "I HAVE FOUND MY TRUE HOME."

You can find some really cheap vintage and classic clothes for a steal. Two bucks for a pair of pants and shirts for fifty cents.

Maybe I'll get REALLY lucky and he will refuse to come back home with me. (TOTALLY KIDDING !)

So Massey will get her much needed therapy and Zach will get some much needed new "Uniforms."

Little Five is an eclectic and funky area that Zach will fall in love with I am sure. My boy needs to have something to smile about and after all I have done for Massey (guard, chorus and even those glasses I fought against) he is due.

Headed off tomorrow for a day with the kids and to enjoy some "ME" time. Isn't it nice that you can consider a day with your teens "ME" time?

An outing and an adventure with the kids...let's see how far I can stretch twenty bucks...I'm guessing pretty far and the reward of being with my kids will be even greater...worth millions!

At least my teens will still go somewhere with me...

Til next time...CURRENTLY COOL COTTON

Golden Boy ???

Started a new approach this past week. I am constantly cleaning up the kitchen, house in general... take care of our yards, the neighbors next door and the front of the sub division. The laundry is never ending and lucky me I have three bathrooms to clean as well.



My seventeen year old son who doesn't work or seem to be able to pass his classes in school is my intended target with my new approach.



About five days ago, I just quit. I quit doing dishes or unloading the dishwasher. Dirty clothes piled up in the hampers and the dust just stayed where it was on all the tables and shelves. The bathrooms I ignored except the one on the first floor where people coming over to visit would go.



Day four into this new approach I hit pay dirt (Pun intended). Zach cleaned his entire room and cleaned the living room that he claims as his "Video Lounge." He organized all his video games , cords and controllers.



He then made the comment that there was dust every where. I casually said that I hadn't noticed. He asked how you dusted a room and did we have a duster? I told him several places to look, never getting off the den couch. He couldn't find a duster and I said that I kept a bucket full of cleaning supplies in the laundry room "Use the Murphy's Oil Soap spray bottle, it's good for any surface except glass."



Tee-Hee!



After he cleaned the living room , he moved on to asking where I kept the vacuum cleaner. I told him (again from the couch) where to look.



The door bell rang and it was the next door neighbor's son wanting Zach to help him go dump some scrap metal . They took the frame for my trampoline that I had taken apart because so many springs had broken off. One more thing done for me!



I left for work while they were gone, went to pick Massey up at guard camp after I got off and came back home. Zach immediately shouted out from another room "Mom, I vacuumed the whole house and the dishes are done."



Let 'em live in squalor for a few days and they suddenly realize that maybe they should help out. They are lazy but not stupid. Zach can't gripe about how the house is falling apart because his only apparent job is keeping the sofa warm and eating six times a day. He WANTS to, but he knows he has no line of defense. He scrubbed all three bathrooms...not really good , but the attempt was there and at least they looked a little better.



Suddenly this concept has inspired him. Suddenly he has grand plans for the living room closet, still full of board games from long ago. Candy Land, Hi Ho Cherrio, Mouse Trap and several Monopoly games. Some are missing pieces, others just haven't been played in ten years.



He boastfully guides me through the house every time I come home now and points out his latest completed task.



I finally realized that I was killing myself like I did when all three kids were young over ten years ago. I work six days a week, always have. I am a pretty good mom I think... but my kids have seemed to forgotten that I'm not having to wipe their butts anymore and they can touch the dials on the stove now without having their hand slapped.



Dang, I should have done this five years ago. All I have to do with Massey is threaten her with taking her out of her many social clubs and activities if she doesn't help, but the boys are another thing. I have finally found that with them, reverse psychology is very effective. Let 'em not have their favorite footies clean when they want them or their favorite fork for dinner clean. Let them realize what a poor shot they are with their penis when they are urinating ... You would be amazed at how quickly that yellow spatter shows up around the toilet rim.



They don't clean the way I would do it, but I look at it this way..."My job is half done for me!"



I was totally wiped out this morning. I left the house yesterday at ten in the morning and didn't stop to sit down or eat until ten thirty at night.



Zach sits around all day and has a lot more time to see the dirt build up than I do. He has finally found that sitting in a clean house is a heck of a lot better than sitting in a dirty one.



He asked me tonight before he went up to bed if I could show him how to do the laundry tomorrow. He said he just wasn't sure when to use bleach or where it went.



I already have an index card with explicit instructions for washing hot or cold, where to pour the fabric softener and when to add bleach...ready to be taped above the washer.



I asked him tonight what I should blog about and he said "Write about how much I am helping out around the house."



He was puffed up with pride and I said I would title it "Golden Boy." He said he felt "Platinum" was more appropriate. He can remain "Golden Boy' ...WITH a question mark.



As for me and my WAY too late new approach...I will be "Platinum Psychologist."



Ya know, I just have to start thinking on my kids level more often. It gets much better results.

One of The Total Pleasures in My Life...Reese

I have been watching this baby since she was nine months old. Actually my daughter is the "babysitter", but I have been there every step of the way. When she first came to my house, she was only starting to crawl. Now, at over two years of age...she has crawled her way into our lives and into our hearts.

She is HANDS DOWN the smartest and most polite child I have ever encountered. At the tender age of two, she covers her mouth when she coughs, thanks you when you give her anything, and always uses the word "PLEASE" when asking for anything. (I wish my sixteen year old had the same qualities).

She knows all of her colors, knows sign language, and knows how to make you love her without any effort on her part at all.

Her mother has grown so tremendously, and has become the mother that I hope I have been to my own kids.

At the ripe age of two, she always says "please" always says "thank you' and always fills your heart with a warmth that is few and far between with a child her age.

She is so wise beyond her years that it totally amazes me with her complete understanding of social skills, and knowledge of etiquette.

She is a complete and total joy to have in our house, and has charmed the pants off of every male in our household.

She is a girl who is destined to be a great woman, and will go on to not only make her mark, but probably leave skid marks in her path along the way.

She can count in Spanish, and she count on me, for being there ANY TIME she may need me or my family.

She has unknowingly wormed her way into our lives, and I have never been more proud to have this toddler in my life.

Her mom has met an exceptional man, one that loves this little girl as his own...and she loves him right back just as much.

He has kids of his own, and Reese has slipped right into the mix as if she has always been there.

I am so extremely excited for this new found love for her mother...she could have never been luckier than to find this new "baby daddy".

I am so excited that they are becoming a unit, becoming a family, and starting to begin a new life together.

My "Little 'Reese' of Heaven" has finally come into her own...her own family and her own place to learn, grow and flourish.

When they marry and move, I will miss her so much that I am sure I will ache with the fact that she won't be staying with me anymore.

But I will be filled with the comfort of knowing that my "little Reese of Heaven" is having the best life she can have, and the best parents she could ever hope for.

Sarah Palin..."LOOK OUT"....my Reese will make you look like Rosanne Barr !!!

Back To School...UGH!!!

Tomorrow starts a new school year for my kids and another year of torture for me.

My daughter bounces out the door every morning looking forward to school (which she considers a social club) and I shove my sixteen year old out the door saying "Just two more years if you pass this one"!! (By this remark I am trying to encourage him in the only way I know how).

My daughter isn't an "A" student, but she tries hard and has never been a problem. She is loved by all her teachers and for the record...is just too sweet to be hard on (maybe that is one of our problems).

My son...God help us, is another story all together. He is the smartest of my three. He can debate like nobody's business, he can tell you any historical or scientific data...he can even tell you why America is in such dire straits....and most of the time I agree with him. He HATES to be judged by numbers or letters ( that is his explanation for his GPA).

My daughter had her orientation at the middle school today, and got assigned to the team of teachers that had my son two years ago. In each classroom that I went into, after I told them that I was Zachary's mom and they had taught him two years ago...their first comment was "Zach was the smartest kid I ever taught".

Not that he passed their class with flying colors, but they saw the potential that I see on a daily basis.

He is a genius, he is my way to an early retirement...if ONLY we can get him out of school.

He fights the system, he fights the rules and he fights the entire concept of a controlled environment. My boy is a rebel...albeit a smart one.

But what I cannot instill in him is that at his age, you JUST have to play by the rules, you have to surrender to authority, and you just have to "PLAY" the game...not fight it at every turn.

Last year by the end of the school year...I had spent more time with the ninth grade principal than I had my husband. I look forward to meeting the tenth grade principal and I am certain by May, we will be well acquainted.

He is a good boy. He doesn't do drugs (a trip to the county juvenile detention center for a drug test guaranteed me that) ...Just checking after a rebellious period. But you have to keep a close watch on your kids, I am not one that will not keep a check on a floundering sixteen year old...and be caught off guard when it is too late.

I have come to realize that he is a pistol. He is loaded with information, facts and data that blow me away on a daily basis. He just doesn't like school. He doesn't like the fact that they judge and grade him on whether he gets a paper signed, or a progress report signed.

But how do I tell him that this is the way it works? How do I tell him that unless you come out of high school a millionaire...life is a hard ,hard road...even if you ARE smart?

I pray for him daily...and he probably prays in his room at night that I will leave him alone.

Guess who's prayer's will get answered first?

I have no reservation in saying that he is the smartest, brightest sixteen year old I have ever met.

Someone please tell me how to help him succeed, how to let him finally see his potential, and how to stop my heart palpitations every time a new school year starts.

Just thought that since I had this blog, I would throw it out there to you and see what came back.

Please help me help HIM.

Till next time..COTTON

"KIDS" ... What Can You REALLY Do Besides Worry ?

I got me a "BROOD" at my house.

I have three kids and they are all so different that it makes me wonder how they are all three mine.

My oldest, who has always been my hope for an early retirement...netted from his HUGE income of being "something" great, has dropped out of college for a break (I hope it is a short break).

My second in line is my sixteen year old son...who is a "freakin" genius that refuses to use any of his capabilities in any type of school work , homework or anything that may represent the fact that he is indeed smart. He can tell you how the Air Bus works, how to build an atom bomb, ANYTHING about history or culture...but can't seem to get a progress report signed or a project turned in by it's due date.

My third is my daughter...sweet and mature for her age, but blinded by the horrible heart wrenching debacle of "MIDDLE SCHOOL" and the fact that she has to struggle for the grades that she makes and most of her friends are seemingly "Breezing" through with all "A"'s. (At least she picks really smart friends). After being exposed to girls in their "tweens"... I have to salute her. Girls at her age are a vicious and conniving sort, and I would rather have my "average" scoring girl than some of the snotty little "priss pots" that I have encountered at the middle school she attends.

My point being...

I am in my late forties.

I thought by now one of my kids would have received the Nobel Peace Prize or at least would have discovered the cure for cancer.

But as a parent you have to take it all in stride. You have to unfortunately take everything into perspective...At least I HAVE them.

At least they are all healthy and happy (I guess that my constant cooking, cleaning and doing laundry pretty much make up the "happy" part) but I am OK with that.

I just want for them the absolute best and most.

It is easy for me at 48 to know what they need to do, but it is a totally different thing to get them to see my point.

I only want them to see that I am trying to save them years and years of wasted time and effort.

I want them to see their life from my view point..and to save them from wasted years, and to show them the short cut to success.

But as I type...I know it won't happen.

Life has to happen at it's own pace, with all of the the interruptions, pitfalls and mistakes.

I wish I could save all three of my kids from having to experience them, but I can't.

The only thing that I can do is to love them, pray for them and be there for them when they need to be picked up...reprimanded and sent back into the world to hopefully find not only themselves but find their way.

I envision great things for all three of my kids. I think that all three are extremely talented, gifted and destined for greatness.

It just worries me that they may get side tracked on the way. It worries me that they may get a menial job that seems like great pay to them, and forget their potential. It worries me that they may think they don't need to further their education...Hell..it worries me that they might get killed by a bus crossing the street.

IT JUST WORRIES ME, HAVING KIDS!!!

If I had known that having sex with my husband would cause me thirty years of constant worry and concern...would it have made me change my mind?

Unfortunately, or maybe should I say gratefully it would not.

I love my kids, I desire the best for them and have tried to give them the best advantages that I could.

I truly believe that all three of them will be just fine. They will ultimately find their way to success...it is just a HARD, HARD road to have kids and have them find their own way...and to let them find it in their own time.

Let's just hope that "OLE" mom is up to the challenge.

Till next time...........COTTON