Friday, January 20, 2017

Long Distance Love

One of the hardest things to get used to here in Orlando is not seeing my Lost Boy every day. He's never been much of a "Caller" and certainly hasn't changed. He has a girlfriend now. I've never met her. He has his own place now. I've never seen it.

I wish he knew how much I missed him. Maybe he does. It's easier for me with my other two. One lives with me and the other lives just twenty minutes away.

The main difference between my daughter and sons is how close my daughter and I are. Always have been. She started out her life so timid and quiet for the first three years.

Then she just as quickly blossomed into the happiest four year old you've ever met.

Heck, we were "besties" before the word was ever invented. I'm lucky in the fact Massey and I have never drifted apart or had a tumultuous few years. Peas and carrots, That's us.

My greatest accomplishment by far in life is these three kids. They all make me a much better person.

 Zach's always marched to the beat of a different drum. Sometimes I even wondered if it was a drum?

He can't stand my "clinger's gene" while Massey seems to enjoy it. TJ got lucky and grew up while I still had two left at home to "cling to."

Even when Massey lived away at college for two years, we spoke almost every single day or night and made many day trips to see her, if only for a couple of hours.

Zach broke my heart when he went back to Georgia after four days here in Orlando. I kinda missed our arguments. I kinda missed him. 

We haven't spoken all that much. He's not much of a phone talker. I finally decided to let him call me. That didn't work out too well either, come to think of it.

He just recently got a great new job cooking for an upscale restaurant on Peachtree Street in downtown Atlanta. I am more than proud of him.

Here's the thing with Zach. I can't call him just because I miss him; I'd be calling five times a day. I patiently wait for him to call me. It happens about once a month, and makes my day.

Zach's a grown man now, and if he doesn't want to talk to his momma every day I need to understand that.

I'm trying to.

So last night, Tim's cell rang early in the evening. It was in our in bedroom where I was blogging. Tim was in the living room so I answered when saw it was from Zach. He asked if he could speak with Tim and said sure. I returned to my blogging. They spoke for maybe two minutes.

Tim told me Zach had suffered a burn while working.

Not ten minutes later, Massey got a text from him with this pic.

When I saw this picture, first wanted to vomit then immediately wanted to head for the airport and get on a plane for Georgia.

He finally text me around nine.

"I'm fine second, degree burn."

When one of your kids hurt, you hurt even too. In my mind's eye he is still (and always will be) the little boy in the above photo.

Not that I was particularly looking forward to kissing that Boo Boo but would if he needed me to.

I've been in the restaurant industry for almost four decades. This Boo Boo was gonna take him out of commision for more than a day or two.

I was scheduled to work a day shift today. Woke up at five thirty AM and couldn't get back to sleep.

I know he's twenty four and grown up, but still love him like my little boy.

To add insult to injury (weak pun) Zach sent his sister this picture of his hand from today.

A mother's love can travel miles and miles and miles but a mother's touch means you have to you be there.

I wanted to be there.

Still do.

So I did the next best thing.

I text my sister who lives a few miles away from where Zach lives.

Just asked for her to check on him in a couple of days.

And I know she will.

Lucky for me have been doing really well at work lately and pretty caught up on my bills , thanks to all the financial support both my sibs gave me when moving here only to find out I was out of a job.

I transferred some money from my account to Zach's.

He didn't ask for it.

I almost wish he had.

How selfish does that sound?

Your children will always be your children, and should  be.

Letting go is hard for a momma.

Watching and seeing them flutter, sometimes falter but always try... pray for their flight. It's what a momma has to do.

Those bubbles around Zach's face, when just a young boy remind me that he is the Battled but is being a man. He 's done just fine.

He's got this.
He's earning it the honest way.

Been there, done that.

   If he ever needs me, which I hope he will... I'll be there.

Love is all you need.

Til next time..COTTON

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