I got a notice on Facebook late Friday night from a dear from of mine I have been close to since childhood. Her Mother had just passed away.
The last few years she has been battling Alzheimer's and has been living in a Nursing Home that specializes in Alzheimer's care.
She was quite the "Grand" Lady...always, even from my earliest memories of her. A divorced Mother of three that raised three great kids and they were always the center and focus of her life.
Her two boys were older and long gone from the nest by the time her daughter and I became really close. Her Mother rode to cheer leading camp with my Mother to pick me up that fateful day in 1977 two days before my own Mother died. The last picture taken of my Mother was sitting on a bench next to this wonderful woman...now they are sitting next to each other again.
After my own Mother died, this woman treated me just like a daughter. She took me to her workplace...Fashion Garment and let me pick out my graduation dress and paid for it. She had me and my Father over for dinner many, many times my senior year in school and helped fill a big gaping hole that my own Mother's death had left in my life.
This woman ALWAYS dressed to the nines (I've often wondered where that expression came from ...but it befits her) and every hair on her head was always fashioned into something you would see Lisa Douglas wear around the farm on Green Acres. Her make up was always perfect and I never saw her in a pair of sweats or one of those loose cotton print frocks so prominent with southern women while in their home.
Once home for the day, she would change into her Leopard print floor length velour bathrobe and somehow look just as regal.
When her daughter and I would go out gallivanting with boys or just other cheer leaders on a weekend night and miss our curfew...she would be standing on the back porch in her leopard robe glaring at us and our comment to each other was always "Oooh...the 'Lep' is riled."
Once I went away to Georgia Southern to college and my friend went to UGA...we weren't as close but she came to my wedding and I went to hers and we always exchanged Christmas cards and saw each other through the years.
She is the most caring and thoughtful daughter I have ever known and her own place is reserved in Heaven just for the love and kindness she has shown her Mother throughout the years. Once her Mother was moved to the home, she visited her regularly and took amazing care of the woman that had taken care of her for so many years. While in the home...the staff called her mom "Miss America" because she still put on that make up and still had that hair done. She may have lost some of her faculties, but she knew she needed to look good no matter where she was.
My sister went by to visit her one day in the home and she said that "Frances" (we'll call her that for this post) sat and said nothing while my sister just chatted with all the women in the day room and talked to Frances as well. My sister said some of the women asked if it was lunch time or dinner time or what day it was...they were all living out their life in the fog of Alzheimer's and just happy someone was there to chat with.
My sister made the comment to the other chatty women that her younger sister Kelly and Denise (we'll call my friend that for this post ) were close friends in high school and were just crazy girls back then into all kind of things .
My sister said that Frances' eyes opened up and she lifted her head as she shook it slowly side to side, and sighed... "Kelly and Denise."
She remembered!
A fleeting memory came back to her ...she remembered us and our shenanigans and my sister had brought her back for a moment.
Denise has loved this woman with the heart, devotion and caring that every Mother wants to have from their child. Denise was lucky to have Frances...but Frances was equally lucky to have Denise.
I told my friend that the greatest thing about their relationship was that her Mother had loved her from before Denise was old enough to remember and that Denise had loved her Mother until even after her Mother COULDN'T remember.
That my friends... is a well raised child... that has remembered the way she was brought up, remembered what an amazing Mother she had and has supported her every step of the way and stuck by her to the ugly end.
Frances is up there in Heaven RIGHT now, sitting by my Mother and probably asking if her hair looks okay. My Mother is probably telling her that she can sew her a new leopard robe and they are both smiling...while my Dad is most likely saying "Good Night A Livin' , Ann (my Mom's name)...she just GOT here!"
We miss our loved ones.
It is hard when they leave us with just our memories and tears.
It is harder to realize they have gone on to a reward earned and well deserved.
Denise would not be the great person she is today without having had the great Mother she did for almost fifty years.
She will be with Denise every day on her shoulder and in her dreams every night as she sleeps...I have no doubt.
Heaven HAS to be popping at the seams by now...It must be a wonderful place to be and I am glad all my loved ones and their friends are there waiting on me.
I hope I make the cut!
The last few years she has been battling Alzheimer's and has been living in a Nursing Home that specializes in Alzheimer's care.
She was quite the "Grand" Lady...always, even from my earliest memories of her. A divorced Mother of three that raised three great kids and they were always the center and focus of her life.
Her two boys were older and long gone from the nest by the time her daughter and I became really close. Her Mother rode to cheer leading camp with my Mother to pick me up that fateful day in 1977 two days before my own Mother died. The last picture taken of my Mother was sitting on a bench next to this wonderful woman...now they are sitting next to each other again.
After my own Mother died, this woman treated me just like a daughter. She took me to her workplace...Fashion Garment and let me pick out my graduation dress and paid for it. She had me and my Father over for dinner many, many times my senior year in school and helped fill a big gaping hole that my own Mother's death had left in my life.
This woman ALWAYS dressed to the nines (I've often wondered where that expression came from ...but it befits her) and every hair on her head was always fashioned into something you would see Lisa Douglas wear around the farm on Green Acres. Her make up was always perfect and I never saw her in a pair of sweats or one of those loose cotton print frocks so prominent with southern women while in their home.
Once home for the day, she would change into her Leopard print floor length velour bathrobe and somehow look just as regal.
When her daughter and I would go out gallivanting with boys or just other cheer leaders on a weekend night and miss our curfew...she would be standing on the back porch in her leopard robe glaring at us and our comment to each other was always "Oooh...the 'Lep' is riled."
Once I went away to Georgia Southern to college and my friend went to UGA...we weren't as close but she came to my wedding and I went to hers and we always exchanged Christmas cards and saw each other through the years.
She is the most caring and thoughtful daughter I have ever known and her own place is reserved in Heaven just for the love and kindness she has shown her Mother throughout the years. Once her Mother was moved to the home, she visited her regularly and took amazing care of the woman that had taken care of her for so many years. While in the home...the staff called her mom "Miss America" because she still put on that make up and still had that hair done. She may have lost some of her faculties, but she knew she needed to look good no matter where she was.
My sister went by to visit her one day in the home and she said that "Frances" (we'll call her that for this post) sat and said nothing while my sister just chatted with all the women in the day room and talked to Frances as well. My sister said some of the women asked if it was lunch time or dinner time or what day it was...they were all living out their life in the fog of Alzheimer's and just happy someone was there to chat with.
My sister made the comment to the other chatty women that her younger sister Kelly and Denise (we'll call my friend that for this post ) were close friends in high school and were just crazy girls back then into all kind of things .
My sister said that Frances' eyes opened up and she lifted her head as she shook it slowly side to side, and sighed... "Kelly and Denise."
She remembered!
A fleeting memory came back to her ...she remembered us and our shenanigans and my sister had brought her back for a moment.
Denise has loved this woman with the heart, devotion and caring that every Mother wants to have from their child. Denise was lucky to have Frances...but Frances was equally lucky to have Denise.
I told my friend that the greatest thing about their relationship was that her Mother had loved her from before Denise was old enough to remember and that Denise had loved her Mother until even after her Mother COULDN'T remember.
That my friends... is a well raised child... that has remembered the way she was brought up, remembered what an amazing Mother she had and has supported her every step of the way and stuck by her to the ugly end.
Frances is up there in Heaven RIGHT now, sitting by my Mother and probably asking if her hair looks okay. My Mother is probably telling her that she can sew her a new leopard robe and they are both smiling...while my Dad is most likely saying "Good Night A Livin' , Ann (my Mom's name)...she just GOT here!"
We miss our loved ones.
It is hard when they leave us with just our memories and tears.
It is harder to realize they have gone on to a reward earned and well deserved.
Denise would not be the great person she is today without having had the great Mother she did for almost fifty years.
She will be with Denise every day on her shoulder and in her dreams every night as she sleeps...I have no doubt.
Heaven HAS to be popping at the seams by now...It must be a wonderful place to be and I am glad all my loved ones and their friends are there waiting on me.
I hope I make the cut!
The larger picture on the left is of Denise and me at our 10 year high school reunion. The smaller picture on top is one of Denise and her Mother talking to my sister and my husband at our wedding. Be sure to click on the photos and they will be in original size.
Til next time...COTTON
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