Happy Birthday to a Great Lady...My Mama

Today , October 5th is my mother's birthday. She would have been 79 years young. An awe inspiring wife, mother and friend to every one that was lucky enough to have her cross their path. She was a stay at home mom until I was around 12 years old...but "stay at home" doesn't begin to describe her.

She had so many talents it is hard to choose where to begin. She could sew anything like a dress designer, she could even reupholster a couch. She made faux fur coats to sell in a local beauty shop and made all the cheerleader, majorette and drill team uniforms for our high school. She made all of the evening gowns my sister needed (unlike me she was very popular and was always on homecoming or Valentine court.) She could stretch a dime...even took a class called "Stretch and Sew" where she learned to make a suit jacket for my father and learned how to stretch a dime even further. My most vivid memories of my mother are her perched over her Singer sewing machine with a glass of iced tea in a Styrofoam coozie (remember them, before the ones they have now..with a plastic rim with slots cut all around for the glass to fit in?) She always had her ashtray nearby (one she had made in ceramics) and a Kool Mild would be smoldering away.

This was back when smoking was still socially correct...we have pictures of her at Sunday school parties with her Pacesetters class...sitting in another friend's husband's lap with an ashtray the size of a small pizza perched on her lap and both of them puffing away.

My mother never drank..not ever in her life. Her father was a terrible alcoholic and a terrible father that abandoned her and her brother early on in her life. Alcohol was never in our house and her only vice was the Kool Milds (formerly Kents) and Wrigley's Doublemint gum. She could pop that gum like a sista and I always wanted to learn how she did it. I never did, but the smell of Doublemint gum reminds me immediately of of my mother even to this day. She was frugal and when we would go grocery shopping at the A&P in East Point on Thursdays...she would buy for the weeks worth of groceries and write the check over for spending money . I vividly remember that every week she made the check out for $60.00. She fed a family of five and gave us every thing we needed that she couldn't make or sew and we lived in the most wonderful way...a house full of love and full of friends.

My mom had her fan club.

From the egg man that brought us fresh eggs every week and sat to talk with my mom at our kitchen table for an hour, to the man who owned the Gulf station (remember Gulf Stations?) and would spend literally hours at our house talking to my mom and bringing her free dishes from his gas station. When I was young, if you filled up with gas you got a serving set, just a few dollars and you got a plate. I still have some of these dishes today..white octagon shaped plates that remind me of my mother just like a stick of Doublemint gum.

My dad's best friend from high school and the Navy had married and settled in East Point as well and he was probably her BIGGEST fan. He would come over and they would sit at the kitchen table for hours while my mom cooked or cleaned or sewed and they would puff their cigs, drink their iced tea in coozies and gossip and chat.

I don't think my mother ever made an enemy...it wasn't in her nature and her character was huge...I never saw her angry, never heard an argument between my parents and never met anyone that didn't love and admire her.

Oh, us three kids made her angry from time to time...but it was always totally OUR fault. Like the time my brother, around 4 years old told one of our older neighbors that his dad was a fighter pilot and wouldn't be home for the holidays, or the time I cut off my best friend's hair with the hedge clippers...Hey! She ASKED me to do it, I just complied. We had our share of whippings...always delivered by my father when he trudged home after work. The worst thing you could imagine to hear from my mom when you were a kid was " You just wait til your FATHER gets home!"

She was always the room mom at the school, the PTA president, Booster club President and just the mom that every one wanted to be around.

I remember when my brother was in high school and came home with some friends and smarted off to my mother...she said to him "Don't embarrass yourself in front of your friends...I can still take you down." He smirked at her and said "Yeah, RIGHT." He was pinned to the floor in four seconds, much to the delight of his high school buddies. He got up and brushed himself and his pride off and scoffed at her that he hadn't been "READY." She quickly asked if he was ready now? To his misfortune he said he was...and was pinned in under three seconds.

I'll never forget that, neither will my brother OR his friends!

As time marched on, I became a snotty Junior in high school who had finally reached her pinnacle...a varsity cheerleader, first chair in the concert band and was coming into my own.

I began to rethink the whole "Mama" issue and in my small mind thought she was holding me back from being the great star of high school that I had suddenly been destined to become.

When she took me to school I made her drop me off a block away. I made fun of her being such a fuddy buddy and thought in my small mind that she was an idiot.

Two weeks before I started my Senior year in high school I went to cheer leading camp. The third day in, the news came in...Elvis Presley had died. If you are from my generation, it was bigger news than when Michael Jackson died. I was devastated. I went to a phone booth and called my mother...who just last week I had made fun of for crossing her legs when she sneezed...now having borne three kids, one of them a C section, I can't jump on a trampoline without wetting my pants.

But suddenly I needed to talk to my mother...I slumped in the floor of the phone booth and cried like a baby. I told her that I just wanted to call and tell her that I in fact loved her beyond belief and was so sorry I had been such a bitch lately. She blew it all off and said she had never doubted my love and loved me beyond any comprehension of the word.

I felt much better after purging my "Bitchiness" and when she came to pick me up the next day from camp , she never mentioned my breakdown but acted as if it had never happened.

The next day, my sister,who was married by this time and my mother and I went shopping for school clothes at a store who sold name brands for under retail prices (That's my MOM) and when I was in the dressing room waiting for my mom to bring me another size of jeans I heard my sister call out frantically. I came out of the dressing room to see my mom with a glazed look on her face and as she fell over, she reached for the rack that held clothes and pulled it over with her.

She opened her eyes once and in that short moment, I knew she was dying. I was a 17 year old kid, but I knew that was a look I had never seen and hopefully would never see again.

I believe she was dead before my sister ever started mouth to mouth or compressions. The 911 call was made and as my sister and I followed the ambulance to Grady Hospital, I knew what the out come would be.

When we got to the hospital, my dad was sitting in a room by himself making the phone calls.

She was gone.

She had just had a physical the past week and seemed to be in good health, but had suffered a brain aneurysm that no one knew about and was gone in a few short seconds.

I thank the Lord for taking her quickly and I thank my conscience for letting me have the opportunity to tell her how much I loved her...when it mattered the most.

The days that followed were a fog of emotions and outpouring of love for this wonderful and fabulous person that I was lucky enough to call MAMA.

The church was overflowing...a bigger crowd has never been seen in that church to this day I am sure.

She went quickly and she went home to Heaven.

It took me over twenty years to get over my grief and despair of losing her to the point that I could think of her without breaking down immediately.

If I can be half the wife and mother that she was, my life will be a success.

I love you Mama, still think of you daily and am grateful that God chose YOU to me my mama. You were beautiful inside and out, revered by many and loved by many more.

You and Diddy are together again...we all hope to join you one day.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY "ANN MASSEY LEACH" .... You just made another tear fall down my cheek, but it is a sweet and heartfelt one, and know that you are missed here very much every day that I am on this earth.

Your daughter and your admirer...forever, Kelly

The first picture of her with her legs crossed was made the day she picked me up from cheerleading camp. She made that purse she is holding, made the entire outfit she is wearing and made me the person I am today. Thanks Mama...

Til next time...a very grateful COTTON...formerly but still a LEACH.

Another One Trying to Join the Workforce!

Last night at work I had a party of five young girls at my table. Ages ranging from 4 to 22. They all had on tee shirts with a logo from a local wing place that I know of from waiting on the owners. I asked if they knew the owners and they said they were their daughters. All cute as buttons and just as nice as their parents (the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.) Out of five girls two were twins and my middle son's age. One of them said they had a class with Zach and commented on how smart he was. Not that his grades show it, but at least I know now that his secret power is slipping out and once EVERYONE knows of his tremendous ability maybe he will finally put it to use!

I asked if they were hiring and the oldest daughter said they were staffed today, but you never know how many will show up tomorrow and for Zach to come in and fill out an application.

Today after school my husband picked Massey up and Zach went to fill out applications with a friend. Around 6:30 I called Zach to see where he was because finally I cooked a good dinner and didn't want him to miss it.

He said he was at the wing place to apply and I immediately told him that it wasn't cool to go apply for a job in a restaurant at 6:30 on a Friday night.

He told me he just went in to get a resume'.

I gently explained that he didn't have a resume' but that he was filling out an application...dang I HAVE sheltered him too much!

Both the boys came back to my house to eat dinner and Zach had his "RESUME' " with him and put it on the kitchen table. The two boys went upstairs to play a game of chess and I picked up his application. He had his social security number right (he said he wrote it on his wrist) but he had our phone number off by two digits. I'll let that one slide, with speed dial and contacts on cell phones, I don't even know Tim's cell by heart or Zach's.

Where the application asked "referred by" ... Zach had written "the owner told my mom to tell me to apply."

I think I laughed for a good five minutes...thank goodness Zach was upstairs!

Granted he doesn't know his own house phone number and he thinks an application is a resume' but at least he is out there looking for work.

My boy speaks what is on his mind.

I remember when he was in middle school and brought home a test he had taken...the last question required an essay type answer and Zach had written "I have no idea what you mean by this."

It's like the time he had to do a report for Black history month when he was in fifth grade and he chose, not Martin Luther, not Martin Luther King, not Martin Luther King, Jr. but Martin Luther King III. The facts were hard to find and Zach said he would just "wing it." I told him that he couldn't make up facts but had to back them up. One of the questions asked what kind of education this person had...so Zach wrote "we can only assume he did well in school." One of the other questions asked when this person died and Zach wrote "He is happily alive."

As my husband often says "That's our boy!"

At least he is trying to get work, and with HIS resume' we expect the offers to be piling in by tomorrow!

Kids... they are constantly wearing you out or giving you the greatest material for a blog. Either way I love them and wouldn't trade them for anything. They make it all worth while and while sometimes I could wring their necks...the next minute I want to hug them and hold them close.

Thank the Lord they still tell me they love me every time we end a phone call and everytime they leave the house...to a mom, that means the WORLD and I wouldn't want it any other way.

Will keep you posted on how the resume' is going for my boy!

Til next time...COTTON (still happily alive)

Still on the Laptop...arrrgghh!!

I guess I'll have to get used to this laptop since every time I come home from work I find my 17 year old seated at my computer.



I think he hears my car pull in the garage and races to log on so it looks like I am interrupting him as if he is deeply into whatever game or site he is on. I may be old, but I ain't stupid. I am just so happy to be back home where I am loved for who I am that I let a lot of things slide (like Massey's room that looks like it has been hit by a hurricane.) We are thinking about applying for aid with FEMA...maybe we can get her a trailer to live in on the back of our property.



Just gave my boys five bucks to go eat off the dollar menu at McDonald's...let me go jump on MY computer and I will finish posting. This laptop is more work than pleasure to me and I spend half my time correcting typos and trying to figure out where I am on a page. Hang on a minute....I sound a lot smarter on a desk top, trust me!

THERE! I already feel better sitting in my same ole chair with the keyboard at the level just where I want it and don't have to use my blasted finger for a cursor.

The saying is true..."You can't teach an old dog new tricks."

Worked in the yards today before I went to work...helped my mindset and gave me enough of a feeling of happiness to go into work again. It was pretty busy and I concentrated on being the "server" they want me to be (what else can I do?)

My husband went to pick Massey up from guard practice. The calendar in our kitchen had been flipped to October so he went to pick her up at eight instead of nine, when she got through. For Pete's sake...could he not flip the calendar back to September and see where I had written the practice times (you know how they have blocks for the rest of the week even though the month is over.)

God bless him, but how did he make it before he met me to shove him down the path of life? When I got home from work, it was almost nine and my 17 year old said Dad had been gone for over an hour to pick up Massey. I asked why he left so early and he told me the calendar for October was blank where I usually write all Massey's practice times. Three men at the house and no one thought to pull out the push pin and flip the calendar back one month to just perhaps see if there may be some mystic clue as to when Massey got out of practice.

As I said , I'm old but I ain't stupid...I left it alone and didn't say a word.

Going now to write all the practice times on the October calendar and hope that crisis is averted til November. When Massey and I are both gone at the same time, I tend to leave the dogs in control...that's my best bet!

Til next time...COTTON

Home From the Now Hated House of Employment

You know, I was one of VERY few employees...actually probably the ONLY employee that genuinely loved their job and loved going to work. This whole shopper episode has left such a bad taste in my mouth that it makes halitosis seem sweet.





I feel like the managers are watching my every move (mainly because they are) and when they asked if I wanted to stay or go tonight..."GO!!!" came flying out of my mouth on it's own. I just wanted to leave. When I was in the office handing in my money the manager said he had watched me and that I had done a good job of slowing down and taking my time.





So basically I have to change from the type of person I have been for 49 years...to a new person that I don't recognize or relate to if I want to keep my job.





I told my general manager that the reason I seem rushed and manic is that even though I am fifty, I work circles around all the people I work with... most of them in their early twenties, do my job and most of theirs all the time. For twelve years this has been fine...but since being bought out by a huge corporation, suddenly I am not an asset but a liability.



I never thought that I would want to leave this job, but if changing WHO I AM is a prerequisite for me keeping my job...maybe it is indeed time for me to think about moving on. I will HAVE to keep this job and seem happy about it til my husband gains employment. But the minute that it happens I plan to splurge on getting my blog copyrighted...make a list of my fave blogs and begin submitting to newspapers, magazines and anyone who will look at my writings. Maybe I could be the next "Carrie Bradshaw" or the new "COTTON" posting a column.

I know this is far fetched and most likely unattainable, but I just can't give up being "ME" it is who I am, who I have been and who I want to remain.

Don't ask me where this new font came from, I am on my daughter's laptop and can't seem to make it go away. I kind of like it though, I took my glasses off and can still read it! I am not sure why we have switched to yellow text either, but it is really hard for me to read so I guess corporate can even see me at home and want me to end my rant. Don't worry, I'll be back. Big brother must be REALLY watching me...kinda scary but kind INDICATIVE of how lame I am on a laptop. (We'll leave this one out when I submit my blog to editors.)

Hopefully back to the right color tomorrow....COTTON


PS. I finally got the text close to the original color again, still not sure what happened...guess this ole broad isn't cut out for a lap top.

Drama, At Least it is at Home

My computer was acting up last night and I lost Internet access while trying to upload a video. I have become quite the "I.T." and tried to solve the problem. I rebooted, restored, recovered and de fragmented. Reset the modem and the wi fi...still no go.

I noticed a program my 17 year old son had installed and thought "Bingo"...went to add and remove programs and uninstalled it. To his credit (as he will say) even that didn't help. I gave up and went to bed.

Got up this morning for work and my husband was on the Internet submitting applications. I asked if the computer was working and he said it was fine.

DANG..maybe I am in the wrong profession!

Went to work (I hate my job now, hopefully the hate will be short lived) and came home after taking my daughter some food to the school since she had practice til 8:00.

My son came in from school and sat at the computer to play a game and asked where the "Steam" icon had gone. I sheepishly told him that maybe I had deleted it last night while working my magic on the computer.

Hell hath no fury like a 17 year old boy without his "Steam." Not only did I delete it but uninstalled it from my computer.

Having raised three kids, I find that it is usually always THEIR fault when something goes wrong , gets broken or goes missing.

OOPS!! My "Bad."

He was LIVID!! It was a tool that he HAD to have to play the $50 game he had earned for clearing my front island in the yard (where he gained the $150.00 case of poison ivy.)

I quickly said that I could fix it (didn't have a clue as to how) and sat down to try. He started in on me about deleting things that were his and I finally reminded him that it was in fact MY computer that I had paid for and he was simply a visitor that was lucky enough to have free access to "MY DOMAIN."

Back and forth it went until I frantically found a way to re install the program and begrudgingly made him as happy as a 17 year old kid gets.

It's not MY fault his download wasn't the problem..it's HIS fault for being wrong so often that I jumped to the wrong conclusion !!

All is good now.

Massey just got home from practice, finally got her wind suit and they even spelled her name right on the monogram!! I took this picture of Zach when he came downstairs to finally say he was sorry for exploding and found his Alfalfa strand so cute I snapped a quick pic. I even took one of Massey in her wind suit just to even things out.

Ya know, even with my kids wearing me out...at least they love me for who I am and appreciate me when I do things right. They dog me when I screw up but at least they can't get me fired.

Til next time...hoping my writing career takes off soon....COTTON

On a Lighter "NOTE"

The high school had a band exhibition tonight...five bands attended and put on their shows. I , of course was in the concession stand (thank the Lord NO funnel cakes) and only went out to film my daughter's band performance. I filmed the entire show for once and it was too big to upload so I just filmed a snippet of them warming up. I can't brag enough about the excellence of this program she has joined. The camaraderie and closeness of this particular group of kids is a fascinating thing. The involvement from the parents is outstanding and the thing that makes it work. Hey! At least I've worked my way up from funnel cakes to the actual concession stand. I just have video of the guard girls coming into the stands before their performance and a video of the band warming up on the field, but it gives you a feel for what was happening. They did a terrific job and I nearly froze my butt off filming it. As a fifty year old woman constantly having hot flashes you would think I would be fine, but with the wind blowing and I having on a tank top and shorts I had more chill bumps than a savant could count. We had a good turnout and hopefully made some $$$ for the band. After the day I had at work, I needed some uplifting and the band gave it to me. They are a great group of kids under the leadership of a great band director. I may try to upload their entire performance on my FB page. Massey gets upset because I always film only a portion of the show... because I am thinking about how it will be too big to upload on my blog. But if you read my blog, you probably know me on Facebook so you can check it out there.

Happy to be home and warm, happy to still have a job...the dressing down wasn't pretty at work but I understood their point of view and am glad they kept me around. If it had been anyone else they would have been toast. Obviously I must be all that and a bag of chips! I am grateful to still have a job and have one less thing to worry about! Til next time...it won't be long, COTTON

UH OH !

I just got home from work. I talk about how we have "Secret Shoppers"...guess who got a bad shop?

UH OH ! It was me. They ripped my service apart. Out of 1o0 points they gave my service a 69 ...NOT GOOD. It was so bad that you think they would have stuck out in my mind , but for the life of me I can't remember them. First off they said I didn't ask them if they had eaten there before and I find that HIGHLY unlikely. I start every table off the same way, introduce myself and ask if they've eaten with us before. Okay, maybe for the first time in twelve years I did it differently...still HIGHLY unlikely.

They said I let dishes pile up on the table. I am so anal about pre bussing my tables that by the time my guests leave there is nothing there but drink glasses and napkins. It's why the bussers love me..because my tables are so easy to clean and re seat.

They said their potato was hard. Well TELL me for Pete's sake and I'll bring you another one. I don't generally poke a person's potato before I take it to them. They said I seemed rushed...what server isn't?

Granted I am a bit high strung and go a million MPH most of the time. It is just my nature, my personality and my way. So they got me on THAT one.

I try to constantly remember to slow it down..but it's JUST NOT IN MY GENES. Trust me, I'll be checking myself strenuously on every shift.

What is crazy about these reports is that they are taken VERY seriously by the managers and their bosses. I dropped the ball. There is no one to blame but me.

In my defense (not that it matters a lick) it was Wednesday ...day 19 of a 21 day stretch of working without a day off. My husband has been out of work for six months and I am the only bread winner in a family of five. I have so much on my mind at any given time of the day that it is a miracle that I can be nice to anyone, much less concentrate fully on what I am doing.

Two of the managers are having a meeting with me tomorrow to talk about the shop and that is one meeting I am not looking forward to. The pressure being put on them from corporate is insane and I realize they have to address my failing report.

But after being at this store for 12 years with ONE bad shop...I feel like that is a pretty good average. Unfortunately it isn't good enough for corporate and if I go in tomorrow and lose my job over this, I may kill myself.

When you have a job like mine and a life situation like mine...it is hard to make it all work smoothly.

So these people didn't like me, they thought I rushed them (they were there for 2 hours...is THAT rushing?)

I have people that come to our store and will sit in the lobby for thirty minutes waiting for one of my tables to come open so they can have me as their server. Just tonight I had three different tables tell me what a wonderful server I was.

None of this matters when you get one bad shop.

All I can do is go into work in the morning and listen to what a bad job I did on ONE table. Although I find it hard to believe that I did ALL of the things they wrote about, it doesn't matter. I often wonder if these "shoppers" realize that they have some one's job on the line when they write their little report?

I am the only person working in our house so I just have to suck it up and step up my performance and hope that I get a GOOD shop really, really soon.

I can do this. I can take this criticism and show them that I can give flawless service even to a "A" hole. I need my job. These people got a free dinner and the opportunity to pick me to pieces. I have to shake it off and regroup. I am better than what they wrote and if it kills me I will never have another shopper's report like this. I just hope my managers give me the chance.

Keep your fingers crossed for me.

A Soldier Finally Goes Home

I went to the funeral for the brother of a dear friend and co worker today. He died in Afghanistan serving our country. He was 33 years old, and left behind a wife and two small children so that he could protect our freedom. The service was solemn and fitting...the burial was awe inspiring. From the fly over to the gun salute to the playing of taps to seeing a Marine touch the casket on his way out and murmuring "I love you, Bubba."

It was emotional and it was somehow uplifting. In the procession to the cemetery...people not only pulled their cars over, but got out of them and stood saluting this young man , standing outside of their vehicle. Women with their hand over their hearts... all of them showing the respect that this soldier deserves.

The pall bearers were his closest buddies and how they made it through this ordeal with grace and discipline is a tribute to their training and dedication . I personally thanked every one of them that I passed , gave them a hug and told them how very much they were appreciated and how proud I am to be an American with men and women that are dedicated to keeping my own family safe.

Now starts the true grieving period. Every one goes home, goes back to their lives.

Whenever you see a person in a military uniform...go give that person a hug or a handshake and thank them for fighting for your country.

The loss this family feels is overwhelming I am sure, but the gratitude for their son and brother's service fills my heart and truly does make me proud to be an American and to have been fortunate enough to witness his final home "going"...He is truly at home now in the arms of our Saviour. Peace be with him and the loved ones he has left behind.

Thank you, Sgt. Shawn P. McCloskey....

Homecoming at the High School

Tonight was homecoming for the high school.. I was running late and when I got there it was a little over an hour to kick off. I filmed the drum line practicing because I think they are awesome and I always liked percussion when I was in the band. There's nothing like a cadence to get things rocking in the stands. I shot the second video when I got to my now all too familiar funnel cake stand. Over an hour to kick off and it was already covered with people setting up their stands and preparing for the big game. I have to hand it to this high school...they make a big production out of each and every event for the kids and have amazing parent participation, which is exactly what it takes to make a successful program. The third video I made is after the funnel cake batter ran out (thank the Lord) and my husband and I went to watch the last five minutes of the game. It shows the band and how many people go to the game...thousands! I tape the band and then the players. Then I film "Chief Wampum." This kid is in a wheelchair and has difficulty speaking and cannot walk but my kids have both told me he is extremely intelligent and is one of the most popular kids in the school. I had to work last night but Massey marched in the homecoming parade in downtown Senoia. She said they had a stage set up to announce the nominees for homecoming court and that "Chief Wampum" was nominated for homecoming king and when his name was announced his parents lifted him out of his chair and helped him 'walk' across the stage. Massey said the crowd immediately began chanting "Wampum, Wampum , Wampum!" What a thrill it must be to this kid to not be thought of as an invalid, but to be uplifted as a school hero and mascot. Massey said he lost by 57 votes..not shabby in a school of almost 3,000. It made me respect these 3,000 kids even more . When I was in high school ...he would have been a pariah, an outcast, a kid that was never given a second glance. This kid is one of the most popular kids at the school and has been welcomed with open arms to be hailed as their mascot and treated accordingly. "Hail to the Chief!"

Every game I work, I gain more respect for the terrific school that my kids go to and for the kids that go there. On another note...no one showed up to fry funnel cakes except me and my husband and we "Kicked Ass." We had a line thirty deep at one point but we made it through. The first game there were five of us there, the last game we were down to four. Tonight was homecoming and many parents wanted to see their kids on the field. Tim and I were "DOIN'" it ...we tried not to look at how many people were in line but kept them coming and did just fine. I told Tim after the game that we were screwed now that they knew we could do it on our own. But I don't mind, helping this great group of kids and helping to support such a positive influence on the teens of today is a GOOD thing and that is what we need more of .

GO CHIEF WAMPUM!!!

ONE MORE DAY !!

Just got home from work. My feet are killing me and I am dog tired (not that any of MY three dogs ever act tired.) Worked in the yards for three hours before I went to work and for a nice change it was sunny...but it was HOT. I went up and cut and weed eated the front of the subdivision and came back home and cut my elderly neighbor's yard.



Work was fairly busy and I didn't think it would ever end. I have had one day off since August and have worked 21 days straight since that one day off... it seems like a very vague memory (maybe I just imagined that I had a day off.)



I had a woman who ordered a sweet tea to drink and when I came back to get her husband's drink order who had just arrived she informed me that "This tea isn't SUPER sweet." I started to say that I was sorry, I thought she had ordered sweet tea, not super sweet tea. For Pete's sake ! I will have to say that people in the South are insane about their sweet tea. They seem to want it to be sweet enough to rot their teeth out before they leave the restaurant.

I told another server I felt like saying "You know what we SHOULD do is have like a little plastic holder on every table with let's say..Sugar, Sweet and Low, Splenda and Equal in it and you could just tear the top off of the individual packets and pour the contents right into your glass and then kind of swish your straw around and stir it up...Hey, LOOK we DO have those on the tables!"

If I'm not busy it doesn't bother me too bad, but when they see I have six other tables with six separate lists of wants and demands...Super sweet tea seems kind of silly to me.

It's like when a customer asks me for a straw. I often forget to bring one back because in MY mind I have moved on past the drink portion of the order taking process and have moved on to thinking about the dinner order. Sometimes they don't ask me again...sometimes they HAVE to ask again (if they a straw freak ) and my standard comedy answer on their third time asking is "I thought the answer to that would obvious by now, it's NO." I never use this one unless I know they already like me and know that I am busy and that I have simply forgotten (again.)

Another good one I use is when the order is being taken and someone will say they want Ranch dressing on their salad and then as an afterthought say "Can I change that to Honey Mustard?"
If I've already developed a good relationship with the table (which thankfully I usually do) I will shake my head sadly and say "I'm sorry, but I'm writing with a pen." That one is always good for a laugh and some customers have even had some good comebacks for it.

Let me say right here that I am a pretty good judge of who I can joke with and who I can't. If I didn't have this unique skill I would have been fired years ago.

I think my favorite story along these lines is when we had a promotion going on for shrimp appetizers. We had two different types. I was giving my sales pitch trying my best talking them into buying one of the two when the husband said "Why don't you just surprise me?"

I said "I am pregnant with your baby." That surprised him!!!

His wife was taking a sip of her drink and it felt like a "Lucy" episode. The drink actually shot out of her nose. We all had a good laugh over that one.

Tonight I had a family of four when I noticed the teen aged son's Sprite getting low, said I would be right back with another one. I got busy and as I cruised back by their table it was getting almost empty...I promised I was bringing another Sprite and went on to check on my other six tables. As I went by them again I said "I know this is the third time I've said I was bringing you another Sprite...but I MEAN it this time."

It's really not easy being a server. Let me correct that. It's really not easy being a GOOD server.

After 21 days on the floor, I know my nerves are wearing thin and my patience is running on empty.

ONE MORE DAY !!

I had to work late and got a text from my daughter ...it was important, she needed me to pick her up some purple panty hose before I came home from work.

I called her back right before I left and asked why?? She told me that tomorrow was SPIRIT day at school (it's homecoming week and the school colors are purple and gold.)

I told her that tonight was "Get your bedroom clean night."

I got her the purple tights and the bedroom was "Cleaner" when I got home.

I feel better now, I always do when I blog...JUST ONE MORE DAY!

Til next time, "Whipped" COTTON

A Bittersweet Homecoming

It was emotional... and it was an honor to see this soldier being brought home to be laid to rest. As I stood surrounded by veterans, I realized what a bond they all have. They are the strongest and the bravest and they were there to honor "One of their own." The day was overcast. As the plane landed ...God parted the skies and sunlight filled the air strip. When we first left from our house the entire sky was gray but in the distance where the airfield was it was sunny. Like a spot of sun in an otherwise cloudy and gloomy day. Even my 14 year old daughter noticed it. When we arrived at the air field...it was solemn and intense. As this brave soldier was taken off of the plane, the sun broke through and he had God smiling on him with all the brightness he could provide. There were thousands of people lining the streets as his body left the field . He was honored by all of these people that maybe didn't know him personally but felt compelled to come out and show their support . Another fallen soldier...another true hero...another reason why we are the greatest nation in the world...people like Sgt. Shawn McCloskey...giving his life for his country. It was one of the greatest tributes I have ever witnessed. Last year when the Black Hawks were shot down was another. Two men who I both have ties to have given their lives so that we can live in freedom . The gratitude I feel is almost overwhelming and completely deserved

A Visit From Reese

The precious little girl that Massey has watched since she was 9 months old for a dear friend of mine is now three and has come to visit from Texas. She is staying with us tonight while her mom goes out to eat and to a concert with her beau. She is absolutely the most beautiful little lady I have ever encountered and it is always a delight to have her in my home.

Massey had guard practice at the high school so my husband and I took Reese up to watch the practice. She was chatting away in the car about wanting to see the flags being twirled by the girls, but when we reached the school and she heard the drums and saw the tubas...it was the band that blew her away. She was totally mesmerized. The minute they began to play she was holding her little skirt out and twirling around dancing like crazy to the music. The minute they stopped...she stopped and sat down. The minute they started back up she was on her feet again doing her little improvised dance and kicking up her heels (in this case, sandals.)

My husband and I laughed so hard it hurt.

If I had only thought to bring my cam corder! I had my cell phone though and snapped a picture of her in action. I have GOT to start taking my cam corder with me so I can capture life's great moments when they happen.

This child has the most beautiful face, heart and demeanor of any small human I have ever met and it has been a joy just seeing her again and seeing how quickly she is growing up.

On a more somber note...

I just got off the phone with my friend from work who's brother was killed in Afghanistan last week . His body will be flown into a small airport in Peachtree City tomorrow morning. I am going to take both my teens with me and check them into school afterward. This man gave his life for all of us and I feel like my kids need to be there as much as I need to . My friend told me that there was going to be a fly over not only at the funeral but at the cemetery as well. When she told me that I had chill bumps. She said a General was coming to the service and I am so glad that this true hero is being honored in such a fitting way.

It has been a crazy week. It has been an eye opening week. It has been a week that will never be forgotten.

Til next time...COTTON

Bring it On, Ya Crazy " #@&%*!$ "

It's been raining here for days and days and days. For Pete's sake... I can't remember what a sunny day looks like.

Worked a day shift and it was pretty slow. One big pop at noon and then it dwindled down to nothing. Once the lunch starts to slow the managers start cutting the staff. They send home three of the servers, send home one of the hosts and all the cooks but one (LABOR LABOR LABOR.) Corporate is on the managers constantly, especially with this economy to keep labor costs down. The poor managers...they get it from complaining customers to complaining employees to complaining higher ups. It's no wonder they all have bi polar tendencies.

Case in point.

Last Friday the general manager was on a rant for no apparent reason. There were only four of us there. All of us have been with the company for at least twelve years...some for fifteen. We are the cream of the crop. We all are the hardest workers who always look good and know and do our job without having to be told (not many of the other 50 employees do.)

We had just opened the doors when he took us all four out to a side room and verbally exploded in our faces. I think you could see sparks flying off of his frantically moving lips while he railed all four of us out . We said nothing (We're smart like that) and tried not to look at each other while he finished his diatribe. It was like he literally went nuts there for a minute. With our morale bolstered (NOT) we went back to all of our tables that sat out in the restaurant wondering where their server was.

We had a slam banging lunch and the manager came up and personally apologized to each one of us privately at some point during the mad two hour crunch. I guess he realized what side his bread was buttered on.

After it was all said and done , I went up to him and commented on what a good lunch we had. He agreed with me and said it all went really smoothly (I told you us four were the best.)

I then said that it was really nice to see business picking up and "If all it takes for us to make money is you reaming us a new one...I say BRING IT ON YA CRAZY BASTARD!" I followed up my joke with a quick hug and told him that I loved him. He laughed, he knows how crazy I am and he is really more of a good friend than just a boss.

He came to work today after having the weekend off and appeared to back to his normal self. I know what tremendous pressure he is under and being a managing partner in the store just adds to his load. I was a manager for the last restaurant where I worked and I wouldn't do it again for a million dollars (well maybe for a million...but not much less.)

Today after it all died down and we were down to one cook and two servers, the bartender and one of the servers decided to order something to eat. Then I asked another server to split a burger with me. I heard our manager talking to one of the maintenance guys who does repairs and pressure washing for us what he wanted to eat so I jokingly yelled back to the only cook (an AWESOME guy and another good friend) "Hey Dean, we got a ten top walking in!"

Such is life in the crazy world of an even crazier server!!

Til next time...COTTON

A Good LONG Day

This top picture is of Danielle and her wonderful Aunt Amy at the party today for Danielle finishing therapy at the Sheperd Center. We had a nice turnout, about twenty people came and there were another twenty people that were already there working. We had tons of good food and friends that all had one common interest..."Supporting Danielle." These are some random shots...the first one is Danielle with her FABULOUS Aunt Amy. The second is of Larry...one of her BFF's and Morgan a fellow hostess.

The third is one of us all cramming down the food and just socializing.

The next is me and Jen "D" a fellow server who transferred from a Florida sister restaurant after a hurricane and has slipped right into our little niche perfectly.

The pics aren't too good, my son Zach made them and I told him after viewing them he was fired...but you get the gist. It was a good turn out of good friends of Danielle. This girl has come from a near death experience and made it back in a miraculous manner. "She is WOMAN hear her ROAR."

Getting to know and love this young girl has been an amazing journey for me and one that I am grateful I joined.

She has had a tremendous support team and her Aunt wins the Gold Medal in my book. An incredible woman that has been Dani's surrogate mom ...my sister would do the same for my kids (God bless sisters.)

It was a good day...and I needed one.

Day fifteen of working and six more to go. Giving Danielle something to smile about will make those upcoming days seem easier...think about what SHE has been through.

I added a small video (I found out how to upload again, Amy) and it is just a glimpse of the people that have supported, visited and loved Danielle along her journey back to us and back to herself.

WELCOME BACK GIRL, WE MISSED YOU !!!

Day Fourteen and Going Strong...(kinda)

Just got home from work. Today is day fourteen in a twenty one day work week. Hey! Only seven more to go. I actually do better when I work all the time...give me two days off and I don't want to go back...work me every day and I begin to feel like it is the "Norm." All I have to do is wake up and try to remember what time I have to be at work and work the rest of my day around that.

It's been busy around here. Last night was the football game, today it rained all day and Massey and I laid around watching TV in my king size bed and then I went into work. It was Homecoming for two high schools in the area and we were swamped with teens (note to self: take off on Homecoming.) They come in dressed like they are going to the VMA's or the Oscars. When I was in high school we had a football game and then all headed to the auditorium for a dance with the disco ball transforming the 50 year old room into an enchanting evening. The band would be some guys from our own school who dreamed of being the group "Queen" or at least gave it their best shot. Today the kids go out for an expensive meal with their dates clomping around in four inch heels and rent limos.

I got side tracked on Wednesday when I went into work. The manager pulled me aside the minute I walked in the door. One of our co worker's brother had just been killed in Afghanistan ... her mother was home for lunch when the soldiers rang her door bell. My co worker (and dear friend) was in the shower when she heard her mother scream.

What parent of any person serving in the military doesn't think about that knock on the front door ? I just couldn't imagine that and although it happens on a daily basis around the nation, until it hits your own house it doesn't seem real. Then the reality travels as fast as a lightening strike. Calls are made, people are stunned and caught off guard.

My heart breaks for this wonderful girl and her close knit family. I talked to her today for the first time. I sent her an email last night and she called to thank "Me." What does THAT tell you about what a great person she is and what a good family she is a part of?

I just seem to be a better writer than talker and tried to convey to her that her brother is a TRUE HERO and should be remembered for just that. He gave the ultimate sacrifice for not only her family but for ALL of our families and for our country.

I truly think about her constantly throughout my day and realize how grateful I am to have people like her brother who are willing to put their life on the line for ALL OF US.

So we lost the football game last night, my night at work was thwarted by teens with no money to tip, it rained all day and I am tired from working two weeks straight without a day off and my husband has no job.

She has lost a brother...his kids have lost a father and their mother has lost a husband. Her parents have lost a son and it was all to let us live here in America and have our freedom.

It seems ironic to me that this will be the second funeral I will be going to for a fallen soldier of our conflicts in the mid east. When the Black Hawk copters were shot down over a year ago...one of the soldiers on board was the son of a man I grew up with and our family took vacations with. It was the most draining and emotional funeral I have ever attended and left me with a new respect for our military and their families.

It seems I will be going to another one.
It seems that my own financial problems are small.
It seems like I am a lucky person.
It seems like you need to stop and count your blessings.
It seems like you always need to look at the "Bigger" picture to be able to see your own and put it into the proper perspective.

God bless Sgt. Shawn McCloskey and God bless his family. Thank you for giving your life for mine.

Dang! Talk About Getting SCALPED

Just got home from the game...our first loss 13-9.

My husband and I went to the game, pulled into the stadium and were told that it was $2.00 to park . How ridiculous is that? Is there going to be some kind of shuttle bus to drop me off at the ticket booth where they want $14.00 more to get in...they must have ushers that will show us to our seats...I was kinda looking forward to that...DIDN'T HAPPEN.

WAIT...it gets better.

After the halftime show I walked to the concession stand with my daughter just to chat and of course give her money to eat. While we were in line the man in front of us commented "They don't have change."

I asked what he was talking about and he told me they had ones but no coins. If you bought something for $2.25 and handed them a five, you would get two dollars back. How much money did they make off of THAT scam? I bet they had coins on the home side of the field...but we weren't allowed over there. (NO DUH)

I gave my girl all the quarters, nickels and dimes I had in my pocket and went back to the stands to sit with my husband.

A lot of the mothers who have guard girls wear shirts with their daughters names on them....my daughter once told me that they had a really "cool"one that said "Guard Moms Gone Wild" and asked If I wanted one. I politely declined. I have already sunk over a grand into this thing and although I think it is a FANTASTIC program, in our current situation my husband suggested me getting a tee shirt that read "Guard Mom Gone Broke."
I laughed for a good five minutes...he can be pretty witty when the mood strikes him.

We had some shaky calls by the Ref's...my husband said the Ref's probably got all the parking money and half of the "mark up" from concessions....DANG, is he trying to be funnier than me?

We lost, but only by 4 points and they never even led til the 4th quarter. I told my husband that with the point spread their school most certainly had going while taking bets during the pep rally this afternoon before the game, we probably would have won .

They were the Seminoles, we were the Indians...but I feel like THEY did the scalping. I felt like hiding in a wig wam and hoping they didn't notice I was from the OTHER tribe.

HOT MESS

The top picture is Massey with her hair back in a loose bun. You can see the curls sticking out from every direction.

The second picture is one with her hair down, only pulled back from her face. She has a head of thick curly hair and THEN some.

The smaller picture is with her hair in what the guard refers to as a sock bun. They wear it like this for football games and competitions. It is rolled tight inside of the cut off portion of a sock and slicked back with tons of gel, then bobby pinned and sprayed. It could stay like this for a week if we left it...it ain't MOVING. She has to wash her hair with baking soda just to get enough of the goop out so she can shampoo it. She stays after school on Fridays so all the girls can have their hair done and then do their makeup (it ain't easy being a princess.)

This morning she got up at six thirty and started getting ready for school. She came into my bedroom with her already plastered back into a sock bun and asked if it looked okay. I told her it looked fine to me and asked why she did it at home instead of after school. She said their choreographer had suggested that she do it at home if she could to save time. Massey said since she had a "Hot Mess" she thought she would try it herself instead of having someone else do it.

I thought to myself "When did she ask me to pick up a
Hot Mess" kit from the store and why didn't I remember buying one?" I asked her what a "Hot Mess" was, thinking it was some new hair straightening product or some type of flat iron.

She looked at me as if I was a complete lunatic (she wouldn't be totally off base) and replied "My HAIR is a hot mess."

OHHH! Now I get it.

I guess her hair takes more time to do than anyone else's and they had probably started drawing straws to see who had to put her "Hot Mess" into a sock bun.

"Hot mess"

Mama's got her some new slang!

Now I know what term applies to the way I feel most of the time these days and sounds a lot hipper than "Depressed."

Once again I have learned something from one of my teens...I'm DOWN with THAT!!

Headed out the door to the ballgame to see how that "Hot Mess" holds up on the field.

Til next time, COOL COTTON

Super Franny on the Fifty

Last week we took my Dad's cousin to the football game with us to see Massey performance in the halftime show. She is nearing eighty, recently had open heart surgery and an open wound from a botched catheter. She spent a couple of months in a rehab and came out like the champ she has proven to be. I picked her up at her house and we went by to pick up my sister who was going with us as well. My daughter's high school is a massive size school and luckily I get there early to help with concessions. I wasn't thinking when I parked the car...I always park by the band room for an easy exit when 2,000 people are trying to leave the stadium. we all got out of the car and stood for a minute or two to watch the band rehearsal and wave to Massey.

Then we started our trudge to the stadium. I just wasn't thinking about Frances when I parked so far away and by the time I had led them both in and out of the school a couple of times and weaved them behind the cafeteria to finally come out on the other side of the school where we could see the stadium in the distance, Frances commented "You should have just parked at YOUR house and we could have walked from there."

My sister and I cracked up. She was right, I made it as hard as I could for her, just to make it easier for myself after the game. Her best friend's son is with the Sheriff's dept and is the resource officer at the high school. We called him on his cell phone and he met us at the gate after our 1/2 mile walk and got Frances into the game for free and set her up on the fifty yard yard line. He also told me that after the game we could go get the car and pick her up in the handicap line right by the front gate.

I gave her a free funnel cake from my stand that I help in and even got to watch the half time show with her. I thought that she would want to leave after half time but she stayed the entire game.

She is a pistol and sharp as a whip. I only hope that some of her genes are equally shared with mine. She is hard of hearing but besides that she is an amazing and strong willed woman that seems to have no limits.

It was the most fun I have had at a ball game and she makes me laugh with almost every comment.

I didn't really get to know her until she had the open heart surgery and went to rehab. Massey and I visited her quite often and got to know how much of a delight she is. She is a fire ball and on top of her game. She knows what she wants and knows how to express herself in the most wonderful way. I don't think that I have ever met a person as strong as her or a person with a more positive attitude or out look.

Geez...I hope that I am like that one day.

Another Anniversary...

Seven years ago today I lost my father to the West Nile virus. I lost my mother when I was seventeen. I was crushed by both unexpected deaths, but as I have grown older... have come to appreciate God not making me watch both of them suffer for years, forget who they were or who I was. They both went quickly and both without years of pain or suffering. The only ones left to suffer were us...I'll take that bullet for both of them ANY day. My dad was as healthy as you could imagine at the age of 77. A vibrant and sharp man... who just got bit by a mosquito. The ten days he was ill with the virus are embedded in my memory forever. The virus took my only remaining parent from me but brought me, my sister and brother closer together than we had ever been and where we remain today . He was an amazing man and a terrific father. As I go to more and more funerals of my friend's parents who have suffered and battled with illnesses for years and years...draining every one's energy, resources and mental well being...I realize that I am the lucky one. My parents went quickly and spared us from watching their demise with a calendar but with watching it with a wrist watch . My father joined the navy at the age of 16 with his parent's forged signature by his brother...he said he had a lot of nice clothes back then and his brother knew he could keep them if my dad joined the service . He came home and met my mother, worked blue collar jobs all his life to provide us with the wonderful upbringing we all so fortunately had. He is up in Heaven with my mother today, looking down on all of us smiling and saying that us kids are doing okay...he knew we would. He is my hero and he is my father. He is missed today as much as he was eight years ago. Maybe even more. I love my parents and the way they instilled "doing the right thing" in me...I hope I make them proud because I am very proud to have been blessed with two of the greatest parents a kid could ever dream of . I still dream about them both and they are the sweetest dreams I ever have .

Not Tonight Honey... I Have a Headache

Dang, it took me thirty minutes just to get the photos in order so I could tell my little story...not to mention that my kids have my space bar sticking on my keyboard (of course 'They Haven't Been Eating while sitting at the computer')...BLAH BLAH BLAH !

So today is my 19th wedding anniversary. Nineteen years ago today I wore this ridiculous dress and married Tim at his parent's house. I gained a husband and a step son all in one afternoon . I look at these photos and wonder in amazement where all the years have gone...til I look in the mirror. Obviously they have all stuck to my face! The lines, wrinkles and gray hair say what the 99 Lbs don't. I age, I just don't get fat.

It has been a ride...it has been an adventure and it has been a job. A job that pays with kisses, hugs and memories (not all from Tim, mostly from my kids ...but that is what you get when you marry an opposite.)

I truly don't know how he has stayed with me for 21 years. We were together for two years before we married and have been in it for the long haul from the beginning. He came out of a terrible divorce and I swooped in to save him. It seemed like such a good idea at the time ...

Little did I know that 19 years down the road I would have three kids, gray hair and an unemployed husband. The unemployed part is TOTALLY NO FAULT OF HIS OWN... but has been of great concern for him as well as me. It has been the most stressful year of our 21 years together but if we can pass this point in our relationship together...we can do ANYTHING.

I have a back that goes out about twice a year, a bad knee from entering the speed skate for mothers at skate night when the kids were in elementary school and corns on my pinkie toes from three decades of waiting tables and carpel tunnel from carrying plates to tables on a daily basis. As my husband once said when I reminded him of all my ailments..."Baby, you really make yourself sound attractive."

But he is still with me and my loud self. I am a tirade of verbal diarrhea from the moment I wake up til the minute that the three dogs quit listening at night. I go like crazy from the minute I crawl out of bed until I hit the pillow at 2 AM, back up by 7 AM to start it all again. My husband is as laid back as I am hyper, we are two totally different people with one common goal.

Raise our family, love the kids no matter what and try to save some love for JUST us.

My husband has been helping me stretch out my legs at night because they wake me with cramps all night long. I didn't think he paid much attention to me typing my blog every night, but tonight when I asked for a second stretching session he said "Not tonight honey, I have a headache."

Go figure...maybe they just like to play stupid and hope that it works to their benefit...it may for him tonight!!

Til next time...COTTON

PS you can click on these photos to see them in original size...the dress may be tacky, but I look MUCH younger !!