Money Can't Buy You Love

It's been an excellent weekend. I've have all three of my kids here for the first time in over a year.

I'm really not sure where the time has gone...seems like just last week they looked like this.

We all sat around together last night talking and laughing after work and it warmed my heart to see them all together again.

We're packed in like sardines and overflowing to couches to sleep but just feels nice to be a whole family again.

Massey and I spent the day together before work,  running errands and picking her up a few things for school. It's nice to have an eighteen year old daughter who still wants to hang around momma. She's turned out to be a really terrific young lady. Yes she has her faults, who doesn't? All my kids have their faults as do I but have many more great qualities that make the faults easy to over look.

Massey and I went by one of my favorite stores, Yankee Candle to get some more tarts for my burners. We walked in and one of the sales ladies asked me what kind of scent I was interested in? I said "One that doesn't smell like three dogs." The lady behind the counter started laughing. (If she only knew)

You'd think if I had three dogs they'd be miniature Yorkies or Poodles. Nope! I have two boxers and a bulldog totaling over two hundred pounds of slobber . I love the brats and the brats love me. Tim will even call me momma when he's talking to them. I'll get home from work and Tim will say "Your momma's home, boys!" They all surround me and sniff the food from the restaurant and lick my shoes. They follow me up the steps and they follow me down the steps. They follow me into to bathroom and they follow me into the kitchen. It's nice to have three kids (pups) who never have homework due or want something I can't afford. Give them a couple of bowls of water and a bowl of food every day and they are happy as clams. And by the way, why are clams supposed to be so happy? Go figure.

It's been a tough few years here at the Cotton Compound financially and one thing I've learned is money can't buy you love but love can buy you happiness.

We are SO The Clampetts. We're simple and hard scrabble. We didn't find black gold or Texas tea. We didn't get to move into a mansion but live in a house we own. We have family and friends who love us and are blessed far and beyond belief.

This is why I have been able to hold on. As bad as things have gotten, I wouldn't change it . It's made me a better person. It's made me realize who my friends are. It's made me realize how lucky I am to come from such a great family. It's made me appreciate being loved.

It's all about Karma. You get what you give. You get out of life what you put in. Roll with the punches, laugh when you can (always) and strive to be your best.

Hug your loved ones and even hug the unloved ones. One hug can sometimes make a huge difference.

I have one more day with all my kiddos all together. I'm going to bed feeling old, tired, broke but happy.

"Our greatest happiness does not depend on the condition of life in which chance has placed us, but is always the result of a good conscience, good health, occupation, and freedom in all just pursuits." (Thomas Jefferson)

Til next time...COTTON

Switching Hats Again

Just got home from the restaurant. It wasn't overly busy but the tipping gods smiled on me and I made enough to buy groceries for the week and have a few bucks left over. Tonight was my Friday at  the restaurant and tomorrow is my Monday at  the mattress store. Worked myself silly this weekend and looking forward to the quiet of the mattress store.

When I logged into my account tonight,  noticed my blog has 76,976 page views. Not bad for a rookie. I'm glad peeps seem to be enjoying it because I LOVE doing this blog.

It will be nice to settle into my other hat tomorrow. I like working alone. I like meeting new people and I like having time to myself. I come in and get everything ready, check emails and inventory then eat my breakfast my husband cooks and packs up for me every  day.  I upload pics of furniture and mattresses to Facebook to advertise then usually read my book waiting for people to come in. I loved the Game of Thrones series and was sad to finish it. A blog reader suggested The Pillars of Life and lucky for me, Massey bought it for my birthday.

Writing is my passion but reading is a close second. The written word is mesmerizing to me. I envision what every person looks like and know exactly how their voice should sound.  Sometimes I will see a random person and say to myself, "Well there goes Ned Stark, wonder what he's doing in Newnan, Georgia?"

The Pillars of the Earth had me on the edge of my seat by  the end of the book. There were plenty of characters to hate and despise and was on pins and needles until they finally hanged the Rat Bast I detested in the last few pages. I had been posting on FB about how great the book was and an FB friend brought me the next  book in the series to read.

I'm all pumped to go in tomorrow, open up get my duties done and start reading the second book.

The only thing crazier than the book series I am reading is that tomorrow is October. What the heck happened to 2013 and how in the heck has it flown by  so fast?

Life is good here. We've been through a lot survived a lot and been loved a lot. That should be my new motto!

The cooks at  work tonight were talking about me from their line across the expo counter in North Korea. (see previous post) They were talking about how much I eat yet how tiny I am. I do  eat like crazy at work but am running around even crazier. It's not like I'm kicked back in bed stuffing food in my mouth and not moving for ten hours. I rarely eat at home.  I cook at  home and love to. I'll taste test all through my cooking process but by  the time they all sit down to eat I am ready to start  cleaning up and putting it all away into  containers. I peered across the great divide and told them I was back up to a hundred pounds.

It started out slow and I am known for bringing in lots of candy. M&M's, Reese's, Whoppers and  like me some Sweet Tarts too. One of the cooks, who started as a dishwasher and thanks to my persistent nagging was allowed the chance to move up and has proved  to be a great addition to the cook line in North Korea asked me if I had any chocolate? I told him no and he asked if I had time to walk over to the candy store  and buy some. It was slow so I walked  over, it's only three stores down... they were closed up tight as a drum with a note taped to the front door: "Our last day will be Sept. 29"

On the other side of our restaurant is a theater so walked over there to go into the lobby to get my buddy his fix. They wanted four bucks for a tiny box of M&M's. I asked if the price included a movie ticket? It didn't so I walked back over to the restaurant.

I told my friend (who BTW is African American) "Hey buddy, sorry but if you want some chocolate your best  best is to gnaw on your arm."

He is one of the nicest most polite young men I have ever met. Always calls me Ms. Kelly and is a hard stinking worker. He also attended the camp my youngest son did for a thirty day stint.


Dollar Tree is right next  door to my mattress shop and will drop by  tomorrow and buy my buddy  all the candy  he could possibly want. I'll even pick me up another bag of Whoppers, the breakfast of  idiots.

Going to bed feeling blessed. I have two jobs I love , a family and a bunch of other peeps who always have by back. Yep...I'm sitting pretty.

Til next time...COTTON

First Visit

Worked the day shift at  the restaurant today. My sister and her husband came in to eat brunch with her former flight attendant buddy, her husband and one of their daughters. It wasn't balls to  the walls busy  so I got to chat while I waited on  them. It was my sister's friends  anniversary so Cin had me get my boss Len  to make them  his yummy cannoli cake for dessert.  I've told my sister about how when parties order one we take it out and show them the cake, let them take pictures then take it back to the kitchen to cut and serve it. That way, us servers are sure to get a nice fat slice too!

After they finished brunch my sister said "We'll be wanting you  to cut our cake at  the table please." She so funny!! There was plenty left over for us servers, Barb (the owner's wife) and the guests of honor. Len bakes a mean cake.

Massey's roomie's mom brought some blackout curtains and a curtain rod by for the girl's dorm room which gets full sun through a huge window so after work I went for a short visit. The bartender at  work wanted to go with me, got off when I did  and actually HAS a car, unlike me so it worked out great! We zipped up there in no time in her cute little Scion. We parked in the lot next  to  the dorm. It said $6.00 on  the sign and said to put  the money into  a slot on one of  those big self pay boxes. We were in space number 41. I went to put the money in but the numbers started at  101 and went up  to 180. I told her what the heck, we weren't staying long, lets just go get  the girls and take them to dinner.

If I was worried  about  Massey's safety (which I am) fears were quickly put to rest when we stepped into  the lobby of her dorm. I told them I was there to see Massey  Cotton. They told me she had to  come downstairs  to check me in. When Massey  got  there, I had to surrender my drivers license, give them my cell phone number and after scrutinizing my ID had a bracelet taped around my wrist. When you get in the elevator to go up to her floor, Massey has to scan her card before the elevator will work. So I had to wait in line for a minute or two, I'm  down with that...just keep my girl safe. Even when students  come into  the lobby,  they have to stop and show their ID before going to the elevators. I like it!

We went up  to their room and hung the curtains for them. We had the door propped open and  I bet at  least four people stopped by and said hello to the girls, one of them even said "You must be Mrs. Cotton, nice to meet you!"

I'm thinking I like this place!

I was worried about  my friend's car and would hate to drive back  to Newnan with her car booted. I remember a Simpsons episode when Homer's car got booted and he drove home anyway with  the car kerplunking over the boot. Click on the video.

Her car wasn't booted so we all piled in and went to the Varsity for a lube job. We ordered our  food when my friend decided to add a F.O. to her order. That  would be a Frosted Orange, a frozen specialty at  the Varsity. She told the girl  behind the counter "That's $2.39 extra." The girl said "How'd you know that?" My friend  said it was on the menu board behind the  girl's  head, but I chirped right in, pointed at my friend and said "She used to work here." The girl said "For real?" I almost said "Fo shizzle!"

Let me just state here that I have been eating at  the Varsity  since  the sixties and have NEVER seen a white person behind the counter at  the Varsity taking orders. Giving them, maybe. It's mostly African Americans and Indians ( dot not the feather).

We  ate our deliciously disgusting food and had  a great  chat. We  took the girls back  to their dorm taking the scenic route.  Downtown Atlanta is an amazing and beautiful city. I'm elated that Massey has  this opportunity and know she will make the most of it. We illegally parked again in the lot and walked  the girls back  to the front door of the dorm.

Hugs all around, kisses and hugs again.

It's crazy, but I'm okay with this so far. I thought I would be a wreck but feel really good about the security. If they are ever anywhere on campus and feel uneasy they can make a call and be escorted home by  campus police. Buses for  the school run every ten minutes and you can't get on one without scanning  your card.

It takes a little time to get into her dorm to see her but I appreciate the extra effort.

She starts classes tomorrow. I have a good feeling about this. It's not been easy getting her this far but know in my heart she will take and appreciate this opportunity, make us all proud and go far in life.

HUGE shout out to my brother who helped make it all happen. Huge shout out to my sister and bro in law who loaned me a car tonight so I can start my new job  this week. Just a general shout  to everyone who loves and cares for me, I am one extremely stinking lucky person.

Life is good, God is good and I am blessed beyond belief! It's a wonderful  thing to be loved.

Til next  time...COTTON

It's Getting Better All The Time

 Zach has grown up. Sometimes as a parent you just have to wait. The wait was well worth it.

My oldest is out flapping his own wings around and keeping himself up.  I am pretty proud.

Massey is my last and  makes me realize that I am getting older whether I want to or not.


Tomorrow my youngest turns into a senior. It is a "Senior" moment for me. I have raised three kids with three different results but love them all the same. As I see it as a parent...as long as you love them and show them the way, it's up to them which path to choose.

Some of my kid's have taken detours but have never detoured from my loving them.  They are all healthy and that is number one. They are all smart number two...Combining number one and number two is the best I can hope for and the thing I am banking on for number three.. "SUCCESS!"

So what none of them got cars when they turned sixteen? TJ got a car shortly after he turned sixteen and at least he was working, paying for his own gas.  I never had a car at sixteen nor did my sister. My brother got one because it was  a gift from my grandparents and at least he was responsible enough to take care of it.

Massey is upset because she doesn't have a car. I am upset that we can't buy her one.  On the other hand Zach is just happy to be able to walk out of the house of his own accord.

Massey is still a kid. She is sixteen and working albeit very "Part Time." At least her grades are great and that will be what drives her even further than most in life.

The high school she attends is full of kids who drive brand new cars (what are THESE parents thinking?)

I tell her time and  time again that as grown as she thinks she is...she is still a baby in the grand scheme of life.

Four years ago we were making well over six figures a year with no debt and a few years left to pay off our mortgage.

Now we are battling back from cut off notices and so much to repay to family and friends that it still boggles my mind.

A sixteen year old girl simply can't grasp this. Well she can, but it is embarrassing to her. Been there..done that. High school is brutal, whether you are a wimp as a male or unpopular and looked down on for being one of the females that doesn't "Have it all."  It tends to be tough in their own little "Who's Cool world."

Massey has been fortunate to learn the most important lesson of all at an early age. Life has no guarantee...what you have today can be gone tomorrow and may take years to replace...if you are lucky.

I am just blessed that she has excelled in her studies is healthy and has a roof over her head. All the rest will fall into place and  mean so much more to her for having gone through these past few years. I would love to buy her a car and have full intentions of doing so as soon as we can. I tried to explain it to her the other day when she griping (as most teens do.)

I said to her "How do you think I felt having to start over at  the age of fifty? At least I was given a chance and  think we have come pretty  far. If I have made it this far in  this tired old body just imagine how far you can go ?"

She passed all her finals... Spanish, Algebra III and Chemistry (a feat her momma never could have) and is destined for greatness. She is now a SENIOR and just beginning the REAL path of life.  She is lovely, she is smart and my best friend. She is misguided in what's really important but what 16 year old isn't?  I can tell you one thing...her graduation party next year will be a whopper and if I have anything to say about it there will be a stinking nice (used) car with a huge bow around it parked in the driveway.

I was an idiot in my twenties ...grew up in my thirties and lived large through most of my forties. Life slapped me in the face and I woke up broke by  the  time I turned fifty, not because of anything I or Tim had done but simply because "Life doesn't have a guarantee."

What life DOES have is Karma and  has been my saving grace. Throughout our struggles I have tried to help others while so many helped me. I  learned to be humble and have learned how not to be ashamed but simply grateful.

That pretty much sums up my past few years..."Not ashamed but extremely grateful."

Til next time..a tired but triumphant COTTON

Make A Wish ??

Got home from work just a few minutes ago and let the dogs out back. I was standing on the deck talking with my sister on my cell phone when I saw a shooting star streak across  the sky. I told her to hang on a minute while I made a wish. I shut my eyes and thought quickly what I should wish for?

I simply didn't have a wish come to mind... I have had so many blessings it felt selfish to ask for more. I won't say I haven't had some struggles but  have lived to tell the story and that in itself is a wish come true!

I don't wanna brag (or jinx myself)  but we haven't had a "Services are being cut off" tag hung on our front door knob in over three months!

 I finally learned how to NOT bounce a check..."Don't write one." In my defense I did bounce a few but it was when the only other choice was to be without water or electricity.

I  certainly didn't do it alone. I had an army at my back from the time Tim lost his job and the army grew when I was fired from the "Western Sizzler."

I have learned a lot.

I have learned that customers are wasteful in a restaurant and learned that if I boxed up left over food from really clean looking customers and took it home for Tim to take to work, he was grateful to have it and I was more grateful he didn't know where it came from. I am even MORE grateful he doesn't read my blog.

I have learned to shop at thrift stores and consignment shops. I have learned that I really did raise pretty good kids that have never once complained when I brought home sacks of clothes from Good Will but seemed okay if not almost happy about it.

I have learned  that teen age boys are stupid and make stupid mistakes.  I have also learned that it doesn't make you love them any less but even more.

I have learned that I can take whatever life throws at me. This was the most important lesson I think I learned. The saying is true..."What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."

I could lift an overturned eighteen wheeler full of elephants if I had to, and I am only mildly exaggerating.

It may sound crazy but one of the things that has gotten me through is sitting at my computer putting it all out HERE. The good, the bad AND the ugly.

 Writing is my release. Writing is my passion and when other people read my blog and it touches THEM, it is exhilarating to me. I often check the stats and this is where they stand tonight.

I have written 979 blog posts. I have had 36,064 views on my blog. I have 45 people that are signed up as followers of my blog and include readers from the following places:

United States, Russia, United Kingdom, Turkey, Canada, Poland, Brazil, Colombia, Germany, Croatia, Slovenia, India, Denmark, Philippines and Australia.

So obviously people all over the world know I am crazy but also know that I am resilient and "One Lucky Mother!"

I didn't have one single wish for that shooting star tonight. It's all happened and I am still around to enjoy it.

I have learned many lessons. I have learned what it is to be grateful and what it means to be humbled. I have learned that "Paying it forward" is probably the greatest concept ever invented and try to live by it on a daily basis.

A shooting star is wonderful to witness and an uncommon sight. Having your life turn around from being totally on welfare  and under not only God's but friends and family's care is one of the most eye opening experiences I  ever had.

Just think how pompous I would be if I had rolled through life with no bumps?

A former co worker of mine who I love dearly  just recently joined  Facebook and found my blog.  He wrote me tonight and said he had only read two months back but had a six pack from laughing and crying.

You need to be honest about your life and I try to. You  can pretend or lie about it...but who's THAT gonna help?

The shooting star was pretty awesome tonight, but so is my life!

Til next  time ...COTTON

Getting Back to Normal...As Normal as It Gets Around Here!

Spent the entire day Sunday with my boyfriend "Johnny." We cut yard after yard after yard. I filled  his tank up twice and made him run like a "Deere." I had grass and twigs in my hair, my face and body was covered with red Georgia clay that I churned up since rain has apparently gotten pissed off and left our region of the country.
Massey is in Florida trashing my high school friend's house and I am at home with so much testosterone that it is gagging me. I lost my beloved Rosie and my girl fled to Florida on the same day. It's me and Tim, Zach and three of his buddies and two male dogs. I've started to pee with the toilet seat up just to feel like one of the gang.
At least males are easy to please. They seem to like whatever you do for them, as long as YOU do it and never complain. Sometimes they get so giddy they will take a trash bag out of your hand and say "I'll take this out" knowing that frees up more time for baking brownies or making another gallon of iced tea.

I am a tom boy anyway...I never put on make up unless I am going to work or a funeral or wedding. I wear a bikini top and daisy dukes when I cut grass. It's hot in the south and I already suffer from hot flashes. I'll work all day in a yard, but I dress for the occasion.

One of Zach's buddies is currently staying with us...he is a sweet kid with a great head on his shoulders and I am hoping it somehow rubs off  on Zach. Not that Zach is horrible, he's not...just stumbling a bit. I'd rather him stumble when he is 18 than fumble the ball when he is married with a wife and kids.

I miss Massey but try not to let her know because she is having a ball with her Aunt's in Destin and  being treated like the queen she already thinks she is. Aunt Del called me tonight and asked if she could stay two more weeks. I told her that I have been throwing away crap every day from her bedroom and by the time she gets back I may be able to actually see the back of her closet....if there is one back there! My girl's sweet but she is messy, cluttered and an obvious pack rat.

It makes for lots of time to pick up extra shifts at work and not worry about getting Massey to and fro. I am going down to pick her up in two weeks and may even be able to take a couple of days for myself at the beach.

As far as living with all these men...they are pretty easy to put up with. They never say "What's for dinner?" but happily fix a plate of whatever I find time to cook and if I don't are just as happy with a bowl of Spaghettios or a banana. If I run out of iced tea or lemonade, they don't take the initiative to make more but seem happy to drink water until I find time or the desire to make more. They don't gripe about toilet paper I bring home from work ...when the rolls get low the hostesses take them off and replace them so a customer doesn't run out. They throw all the small rolls in a bag and Barbara gives them to me to bring home. Massey made the comment one time "Do you think Barbara could buy softer toilet paper?" That thought has never crossed the boy's minds...they are just grateful to not rely totally on "shakin it."

Worked a double shift today and when I went back for dinner we had two big parties to set up for. Len had me show a new hire how to set up one of the rooms for a party of ten. We have glass tables that we arrange in one long table for parties and as I was carefully (obviously not) putting the tables together I turned one of the tables and it BARELY glanced the other and exploded  in my hands. It shattered in a million pieces...and by the small cut on my forearm wonder why they call it safety glass? I was mortified. Len heard the noise...along with everyone else in the restaurant. He came into the room , looked at the new girl who was more shocked than me and simply said "We're getting rid of her anyway...Hey Kelly, when's your last day?"

All the other servers helped me sweep up the glass, which went every where and in every direction. When I went to the restroom I put my hand in my apron to get out my lip gloss and found about two more pounds of broken glass. Thank the Lord Barbara wasn't there and we had it all cleaned up by the time she returned to work. When I saw her come back in I immediately said "Len broke one of the glass tables while you were gone." The snap of her head and the look on her face reminded me of the "RINK! RINK! RINK! RINK!" music from the shower scene in the movie Psycho and I quickly confessed.

These two people have been such a saving grace to me and my family , took me under their wing and into their hearts at a time when I so desperately needed it and have helped me countless times over the past year. So it took me over a year to destroy one of their glass tables...considering my luck it was bound to happen!

I finally returned my brother's car today...he loaned it to us for a couple of weeks last year and I returned it today . He uses it as his weekend car and we have run it to death. The steel belts were showing on both front tires and I couldn't  send it back that way,  considering as seldom as he would have driven it they would have lasted another two years. Being the awesome (not) sister I am...  I had two used tires put on and balanced  put twenty bucks worth of gas in it and took it back to his apartment while he was out of town. I felt like Bill Murray in Caddy Shack slinking away from the golf course after attempting to blow up the gopher with disastrous results.

So life appears to be returning to normal...not that I know what normal is anymore. I am assuming it is the state between frazzled yet keeping it all together , surrounded by Divine intervention and the love of a whole bunch of people.

Sounds good to me!

Til next  time....COTTON

I Made It!

Well THAT was a weekend! I worked three back to back double shifts and lived through the nightmare...even managed to laugh a little along the way. I have a lot of self doubt and tend to be way too hard on myself but ask me my strong point and I'd say my ability to find humor in almost EVERY situation.

Friday was okay. I was on day number five of my work week and still felt semi fresh. Finished my Double, came home and cleaned house til after two in the morning. You are a little groggy when you wake up later that morning but will look around and see all you accomplished while "The Destroyers" were sleeping and it feels pretty darn good.

I'd rather wake up groggy, running late and step into a clean shower than be well rested enough to look around the shower stall and think "This is disgustingly dirty."

My Saturday double began to wear me out around two in the afternoon...not a good sign. I had a twenty minute break between shifts and went to "Medicate" my hooves. Bought corn pads for my darling "Pinkie" toes that were screaming so loud they had to turn the music up in the restaurant so customers wouldn't complain. Bought some callus cushions for the two bone spurs on the bottom of my feet that make me walk like "Festus" from Gunsmoke. It's a good thing my sis bought me a pair of Dansko's to wear at work or I would have asked if I could finish the night in my bedroom shoes.

Enter "John"... stage left.

He is a newer server that has been thrown into "Mother's Day Weekend Hell" for the first time at our store. Let me back up for a sec. We used to have a server named Janine. She tried, honest she did but just wasn't cut out for our store. She was like a bull in a china shop...no more like an elephant in a hamster cage. Everything she touched was a disaster. She would make herself a cup of coffee and it would look like she stirred it with a shovel. Coffee and sugar would be all over the place and you could follow the dripped coffee on the floor to find her if you needed her after she walked away with the cup in her hands. One night during the middle of a Friday night rush she knocked the printer off the expo window in the kitchen that sends checks to the cooks. When she fumbled to catch it (which she didn't) she knocked the container of steak knives off as well. When she tried to catch the steak knives she knocked over the container of pasta spoons. She was a nightmare. She was a nice nightmare, but it was kinda scary. When she had a night off and someone else made a goof up...we'd (mostly Dayna and I) would say "Way to go, Janine."

She reminded me of Hazel Burke trying to be a ballerina in an old episode of "Hazel."

Back to John...Saturday night was crazy busy and he has been sick lately and was still in recovery mode. He went to get the carton of half and half out of the small refrigerator we use and spilled it everywhere. I walked by and said "Way to go, Janine." He finally cleaned up the mess and filled the little creamer pitcher and turned out of the kitchen to take it to his table. He had several plates in his hand as well and as he walked by the computer I was using to put in an order I noticed he was spilling creamer all over the floor of the dining room. I softly(hard for me) said "John, stop." He didn't hear me til the third time and when he did , wheeled around to look at me and created a nice semi circle of half and half on the floor surrounding him. Bless his heart, even his customers were laughing.

We had the Latino dishwasher bring the mop bucket out and as she ventured into the dining room (NOT a place she spends a lot of time) she said "Where I go with bucket?" I told her to just follow John around .

He has a new nickname from me ...that means you ranked in MY book. He is now officially my bff..."John-neen."

Saturday I stayed up even later and glued a broken piece back onto my china cabinet after I emptied all the trash cans. I left an FB status that said all I wanted for Mother's Day was for the house to be cleaned, trash out ...dishes done and laundry caught up.

Oh, I worked THIS one. I printed off my status and left it propped up by the computer.

Then I went and got every dish and glass out of every bedroom, the den and the Man/boy/Cave...AKA garage and piled them in the sink. Then I emptied every laundry basket in the house and piled them in a heap on the laundry room floor with a note attached "Dirty."

Pulled every dish towel and hand towel. You could barely open the laundry room door.

I didn't expect a present... but asking for cleaning seemed like stretching it.

Of course I woke up with NO minutes to spare this morning and bolted out of the house. I did receive presents from both kid's still at home and it pumped me up...maybe they ARE paying attention !!

By the time it ended tonight I had worked 36 hours in the past three days. Wait a minute..."Is it still May?"

Guess I won the grand prize...the schedule was posted late tonight and I am working another double tomorrow. If I am going to perform more shows per week I expect a raise!

Finally got home and released my pinkie toes from those cruel things THEY call shoes. I looked around the house and I'll have to say they got a LOT done. It wasn't "MOMMY" done but it was DONE.

I will say as a woman that represents a LOT of women (married for at least 15 years)..."We always appreciate the effort but know we could have done a better job....That's just US!"

So tired but it's a GOOD tired.

The fam knocked my work load in half and to me...that is the greatest present a Mom could ever get. "WOOT WOOT and HOOTY HOOT!!"

Happy Mother's Day to every woman or every man.

Til next time...COTTON

Mother's Day....Really?

Went into work this morning to open . Of course I left with NO minutes to spare and had to stop for gas. When I pulled into the station I had five minutes to pump gas, pay and get to the restaurant which was one minute from the gas station. There was only one other vehicle there so I thought my odds were pretty good of making it on time..."NOT."

The other vehicle was a county truck marked "Animal Warden."

When I was a kid they were called "Dog Catchers." We would see them coming down the street and all line up and scream at them "BOO Dog catchers!" It consisted of a man riding in a truck with cages on the back and a long pole with a huge net on the end hanging on the side of the truck.

The woman in front of me at the cash register had pepper spray, multiple weapon looking devices hanging from her belt and a shirt with "Animal Warden" written in bold letters across the back. I guess animals have gone downhill since I was a kid and require a lot more force to be taken into animal custody.

As I waited for her to have her fifteen scratch off lottery tickets checked I noticed I had two minutes to get to work. One of her tickets happened to be a winner so then I had to wait while she decided what scratch offs she wanted to buy with her five dollar pay off. She actually turned to look at me and said "I ain't never won before." She finally chose "Two number sevens and one number twenty...and give me a Mega Millions for tonight. Straight box...cash option. Then I'll take a Jumbo Bucks...no make that a Fantasy Five quick pick."

I almost grabbed her pepper spray off her belt and doused her with it. By the time she could see again, I would be clocking in at work with my car hidden behind the restaurant.

I felt like screaming "My GOD woman, take your tickets and go catch some critters...they're out there just waiting to take over our county and we need you back on patrol. Time is wasting...Go gettum!"

Of course it wasn't HER fault I sleep until the very last second and know (to the minute) how long it takes me to shower, iron a work shirt and get out the door to get to work on time, but she was throwing a kink in my plan and I never liked "Dog Catchers" anyway. You can call them "Animal Warden" if you want to ...but they are still "Dog Catchers" to this ole girl.

Worked lunch, clocking in five minutes late and got off in time to pick Massey up from school and go home and lay on my bed in a prone position that wouldn't mess up my hair or makeup for forty five minutes. When I woke myself up with a start with that big snore that even scares yourself as you finally drift off ...it was time to head back to work.

Mother's Day is a joke for servers that are Mothers. It is almost like being punished and taking a cut in pay all at the same time. It amazes me how people come in to eat, see my wedding ring, gray hair and wrinkles on my face (very obvious signs of Motherhood) and still leave a crappy tip.

Of course these are just the amateurs, people that only go out to eat when forced to and know they will never see you again...a crappy tip is better than no tip, so at least they throw you a scrap.

Thank goodness I am at a great restaurant that has a very good regular clientele and will make some really good money this weekend. The down side..I am working Friday day and night, Saturday day and night and as an added bonus another double shift on Sunday.

At least I am working, and in this economy that is definitely a good thing.

Headed to fold another load of never ending laundry and watching some CNN before I get up to do it all again.

At least I know I won't have to wait on Osama and his multiple wives this weekend.

Til next time... A Super Tired Mom.

Earned My Title of "Camp Fire Girl" Again

When I was in first grade I was a "Blue Bird." That is the equivalent of a "Brownie."

After a couple of years I 'flew up' to the status of Camp Fire Girl and stayed in until seventh grade. I am still friends with several of the girls that were in my Troop.

Last night my "Camp Fire" training came in handy (NOT.)

Massey had a sleep over with several other girls. The plan was to camp out in the back yard in a big tent and roast hot dogs and make Smores over the fire pit.

My two sons dug a huge fire pit several years ago in the middle of our back yard during an industrious spurt of unasked for hard work. It is at least six feet across and outlined with bricks and large stones found back in the woods behind our house.

I came home from work one night last year to find Zach and the next door neighbor's son burning some old broken down bed room furniture of Massey's that had just been taking up space in the garage. The flames were well over twenty feet high and I immediately pulled the hose into the back yard when I saw my son and the neighbor tossing over a huge chest of drawers over the fence from my neighbor's yard into ours.

It was more a "Bon" fire pit and made me EXTREMELY nervous when they chunked the huge dresser onto the already twenty five foot high inferno.

Zach has recently cut down a small tree in the woods behind our house (I'm not sure WHY he did but I didn't bother to question him when he chose physical activity over video or computer activity.) When you have teens... I have learned it is best to never look a gift horse in the mouth.

I asked Zach if he would drag the tree into the back yard so his Dad could chop it up for the fire pit? I think adding the part about Tim doing the chopping made the deal sweeter and Zach lugged the tree into the yard.

After begging Tim to chop the tree up saying I wouldn't ask him for anything else (with my fingers crossed behind my back) he went and halfway chopped the tree. It was pretty dry so I could snap most of the smaller branches myself and the pit was pretty full of dead limbs and ready to go.

The girls hadn't pitched the tent yet...for Pete's sake it was still 90 degrees at 8:00 and I told them they'd die of heat stroke if they all squeezed into a tent before the sun went down. Instead I suggested we light the fire and do a little "Smoring."

I didn't have any kindling and Tim already had the fire pit full with the tree so I tried a piece of newspaper stuck in the middle. The dry leaves burned up quickly but the fire didn't catch.

The girls were sitting on the back deck at the patio table by the kitchen door unwinding coat hangers in anticipation of their "Smoresfest."

I went into the garage to see if I had any lighter fluid left (of course not) so chose instead about a cup of gasoline.

I guess by now you can see where this story is headed...

The girls were all far away from the fire pit...I was out in the middle of our huge back yard and kind of spread the gasoline around pretty evenly for an even burn.

I lit a piece of paper and stepped back as I tossed it into the middle of my fire pit.

The atom bomb that went off would have been impressive if it hadn't scared the living poop out of me and even made my hair blow back from my astonished face.

After checking to make sure I still had eye brows I turned to the girls who were all, for once quiet and speechless and said "I guess we have ignition."

I made a mental note to buy more lighter fluid and dragged the hose into the back yard.

I looked at the back kitchen door and saw my husband standing behind the glass shaking his head back and forth slowly as if to say "And you call ME stupid."

Once the fire died down the girls all came out into the yard with their marsh mellows on wires and I told them "They may taste a little unleaded but I don't think they will kill you."

When I went inside to change my underwear I asked my husband if he heard me light the fire pit... he said he not only heard it but it shook the house.

I guess I know now why gas is almost $3.00 a gallon. That's some powerful crap!

The girls all had a ball and enjoyed seeing me set off an atomic bomb they could admire from afar and I learned why I always kept kids FAR away from me while trying to light a fire.

The girls never even set foot in the tent...they would have died from heat exhaustion it was was so hot last night but opted for Rock Band in the living room til well after 2 in the morning after sending me on a midnight run to the convenience store for more Cokes, Skittles and Almond Joys.

So I AM a little stupid...but at least I know enough to keep every one else out of harm's way while I attempt to make my children Motherless.

Guess I didn't shine as a Camp Fire Girl last night but I was a hit as the entertainment and as a bonus discovered I may have Bladder control problems.

All's well that ends well...and the sleepover didn't end til 4:30 this afternoon.

How funny can things be to a group of 14 and 15 year old girls? By the sounds I heard until well after 3 in the morning...they must be pretty hilarious.

They all had fun and I dodged death.

I'd call that a successful evening.

Til next time..."The Flame Thrower."

The Untrained Eye of An Adoring Mom

Just rolled in from work, threw some more unending laundry in the washer and ironed a work shirt for in the morning.



With all my rituals out of the way I am once again free to type me little heart away.



I went to see Massey in her competition today in North Dakota. Maybe it was just Canton but it felt like I was on a major road trip with Atlanta traffic. My google directions were great...didn't make one wrong turn and I didn't even have a co pilot to read the exits off to me. Am I a multi tasker or what? Besides that, Massey was sending me texts every ten minutes to be updated on my where abouts.



She told me where they were staying at the high school and like the great sneak I am I parked by the buses in the "No Spectators" parking lot and walked right into the school to find them in their "Dorm room" for the weekend. They were pumped! An awesome first performance and these kids were on top of the world. I snapped this picture of them before I went to buy my ticket to join the other people that obeyed all the rules and parked correctly.



I stood in the video taping area so I could tape the performance. The thing about taping is that you are so concentrated on holding the camera steady and including the wide shot of the whole group that you actually don't "SEE" the performance.



The tarp was pulled out...ECHS took the floor.



Yes I did hear a couple of drops and saw some flags that weren't in EXACT sync...but I thought it was beautiful and pretty spectacular in some spots...with my skewed view.



Obviously LITTLE do I know about guard competitions.



When I wormed my way back down to their "Dorm" in the cafeteria the mood was at MOST very bleak. They all said "We sucked. " "It was horrible."



I told one of the girls it may not have been as good as their first performance but it certainly didn't suck and on top of that...sometimes you can't win them all.



It's a fierce competition in the world of Guard. Sometimes you "Stick It" and sometimes you don't.



I was unaware that Massey had started out with the wrong flag...she was no where to be found in the "Dorm" and after talking to some of the chaperones for about five minutes she appeared from the rest room with puffy and bleary eyes.



She was devastated...all her eye make up was gone and she fell into my arms sobbing.



At that precise moment... I was so glad that I had made that long trek for a five minute performance.



That is my job as a mother...to be there when my girl needs arms to collapse into .

After a long talk and wiping away many tears I assured her that if THIS was the worst thing that happened in her life she would be a lucky young woman.

I can guarantee that she will NEVER start a performance again without checking, rechecking and checking again that her flags are in correct order.

It is life...

It's mistakes made along the way and lessoned learned.

By the time I had to leave for work she seemed a lot better and more in control of those ALWAYS high emotions that come so easily to fourteen year old girls.

Her coach was extremely nice about her mistake...Kudos to him.

Webster's defines 'mistake' as "An error or fault resulting from defective judgement, deficient knowledge, or carelessness."

If I know my girl...and I think I do, she will learn from her mistake and never make this one again.

You live and you learn.

That is life...sometimes it's rough and tumble and some times it's smooth sailing.

It's how you handle the bad times and how much you appreciate the good times.

I'm just glad I was there when she had a rough and tumble day.

I'm including the video I shot...YOU be the judge!

Til next time...A "Glad I was there for my girl" COTTON

PS Be sure to click on the pic I took of the group...a great bunch of kids with a LOT of support from a great bunch of parents.

The Arnold Ziffle Sniffles

Now I have both my younger kids at home "pick" in bed. (see previous post)

There are currently eleven cases of H1N1 in our county. Hopefully that ISN'T what my kids have, but all beds have been stripped, towels and toothbrushes pulled, washed with bleach and I just ran to the store to pick up some more Lysol to give their shared bathroom a good scrubbing.

If they wake up with curly tails and flat noses in the morning I'll take them to the doctor ( or would the vet be cheaper?) but there are tons of kids out sick this week in their high school and I am praying they will recover on their own with all the water, Mucinex and OJ I have been washing Advil down with.

I read the newspaper from our county online tonight and many parents posted comments on the story about H1N1. Most parents said their own kids were only sick for a couple of days and recovered quickly.

As I type this blog... with my fingers crossed and simultaneously sending up a prayer to the big Guy upstairs I am hoping that my kids will be just as lucky.

They are both usually really healthy kids are are rarely sick so I am hoping they will bounce back quickly.

I got home from work around 4:15 and they both seemed better. I brought them both some French Onion soup and baked sweet potatoes and they seemed to rally.

As the night has gone on they both seem to be puny again, but night time always seems to bring out the worst when you have a fever or the flu, or a cold or whatever they both have.

At least my husband and I seem to be okay and none of the dogs are complaining, so I'll just play it by ear.

I'll just leave their honking cough in God's hands and hope that every thing works out okay. We have several people at work who are sick as well and so far everyone seems to be alright and it's just lasting 48 hours or so.

My sweet brother in law went and checked Massey out of school today when she called me sick and wanting to come home (I was already at work.)

Time to go pump in the bedtime dosages and get back to scrubbing down the house.

At least my house will be clean...I hope it wasn't the house looking like a pig sty that invited these unwelcome germs !

After raising three kids I have a pretty good idea when they need to go to the doctor and when they need to just rest and drink fluids...let's hope it is the second and not the first.

Til next time... Clara Barton (aka Dr. Doolittle)

Spreading Like Wildfire

My son's poison Oak is spreading like wildfire. I am just trying to get him through the weekend and will take him to the doctor tomorrow. Bless his heart he has been really good about it (considering it was my request he do some yard work for me.)

It is all over his stomach and chest...arms and legs too. He takes at least four Aveeno baths a day and has been through three tubes of cortisone. There is a low cost clinic near me that I can take him to ...and plan to be waiting when they open the doors. Thank the Lord he bites his nails ...in other words he doesn't have any nails. At least he hasn't been able to draw blood and all the rashes are closed. I need to remind him NOT to bite them now...Pete's sake, something ELSE to worry about! I already gave him the "Handwash really good BEFORE peeing or you'll REALLY be sorry."

I've been lucky since we lost our medical insurance. All my kids have been happy and healthy and God has kept them all safe from illness and harm.

Of course they find other ways to make money disappear...kids are good at that, but at least they've been well.

I feel bad because I am the cause of Zach's need for a doctor. He DID do a really good job in the yard though and when he came down with the rash I decided to pay him for his work. I also wanted to show him how much I appreciate him letting me try a dozen or two home remedies and wive's tales on him before taking him to a real doctor (bless his pea pickin' heart, I know he's been miserable.)

My sister tried banana peels for her poison ivy, my manager at work said bleach in his bath water...oatmeal and vinegar paste and a friend said on facebook to let him wash with Tide powder detergent.

A regular of mine came in to eat tonight. She is a pediatric nurse so I sat down and told her about my 'cherry' red boy. She immediately said I had to take him to the doctor for a shot , if it got in his blood stream he could end up in the hospital (something ELSE to worry about.) I told her all the home remedies I had tried and told her that a friend suggested him washing himself in powder Tide.

I wish you could have seen the look on her face.

It reminded me of the look I got from my pediatrician when she took off Massey's diaper during a routine physical and saw that I had a quarter taped over her belly button with a band aid. When I was at work, a sweet ole SOUTHERN mother of three was watching Massey in her own home, along with Zach and TJ . When I picked Massey up the first day the kids went to her, she commented that Massey had an "OUTY" and not an "INNY."

She told me that her mother's aunt's cousin always said to tape a quarter over the baby's belly button and it will make an "OUTY" an "INNY." So I stopped on the way home and bought some band aids and kept that quarter on her belly button just as faithfully as I kept the heart monitor strapped to her little four pound body.

When I took Massey in for a check up and the doctor saw the quarter taped over my infant's belly button...the look on her face was pretty impressive. I didn't know eye brows could go up that high!

She was very sweet to me. She's from India originally ...I absolutely love her to death and she has seen all three of my kids... Massey and Zach from the day they were born. She said " Oh Missus Cotton.. you really need to take that off of her belly button, Massey will be just fine without it ."

She was right. Massey turns fourteen next month and has a really cute belly button...and it's not an "OUTY."

I used to run to the doctor for every symptom with my kids. Then as they started to grow up and I realized how hearty and resilient they were..."Wive's tales and home remedies" started having an appeal.

I would NEVER endanger my children and have been through a couple of operations (tubes) for Massey's ears, a couple of bone breaks and always trips for stitches with the two boys.

It's kind of like the "Pacifier" evolution.

When you have your first baby and they drop their precious pass eee..you rush to boil water.With the second you run it in under hot water and with the third you stick it in your own mouth . Thank goodness I only have three kids... if I'd kept on like Octu Mom ... by now I would be letting one of the dogs lick what is obviously their own dog hair off and feeling it was a win win situation.

I know when to throw in the towel though and this is one of those times. At least when I take him and the doctor comes in, he won't have a quarter taped to his belly button... he will just most likely drop to his knees and say " Doctor, please help me ... FOR REAL."

Special thanks to my boy for at least letting me try...sorry it took me so long to give up.

I LOVE YOU, Mom