Spent the entire day Sunday with my boyfriend "Johnny." We cut yard after yard after yard. I filled his tank up twice and made him run like a "Deere." I had grass and twigs in my hair, my face and body was covered with red Georgia clay that I churned up since rain has apparently gotten pissed off and left our region of the country.
Massey is in Florida trashing my high school friend's house and I am at home with so much testosterone that it is gagging me. I lost my beloved Rosie and my girl fled to Florida on the same day. It's me and Tim, Zach and three of his buddies and two male dogs. I've started to pee with the toilet seat up just to feel like one of the gang.
At least males are easy to please. They seem to like whatever you do for them, as long as YOU do it and never complain. Sometimes they get so giddy they will take a trash bag out of your hand and say "I'll take this out" knowing that frees up more time for baking brownies or making another gallon of iced tea.
I am a tom boy anyway...I never put on make up unless I am going to work or a funeral or wedding. I wear a bikini top and daisy dukes when I cut grass. It's hot in the south and I already suffer from hot flashes. I'll work all day in a yard, but I dress for the occasion.
One of Zach's buddies is currently staying with us...he is a sweet kid with a great head on his shoulders and I am hoping it somehow rubs off on Zach. Not that Zach is horrible, he's not...just stumbling a bit. I'd rather him stumble when he is 18 than fumble the ball when he is married with a wife and kids.
I miss Massey but try not to let her know because she is having a ball with her Aunt's in Destin and being treated like the queen she already thinks she is. Aunt Del called me tonight and asked if she could stay two more weeks. I told her that I have been throwing away crap every day from her bedroom and by the time she gets back I may be able to actually see the back of her closet....if there is one back there! My girl's sweet but she is messy, cluttered and an obvious pack rat.
It makes for lots of time to pick up extra shifts at work and not worry about getting Massey to and fro. I am going down to pick her up in two weeks and may even be able to take a couple of days for myself at the beach.
As far as living with all these men...they are pretty easy to put up with. They never say "What's for dinner?" but happily fix a plate of whatever I find time to cook and if I don't are just as happy with a bowl of Spaghettios or a banana. If I run out of iced tea or lemonade, they don't take the initiative to make more but seem happy to drink water until I find time or the desire to make more. They don't gripe about toilet paper I bring home from work ...when the rolls get low the hostesses take them off and replace them so a customer doesn't run out. They throw all the small rolls in a bag and Barbara gives them to me to bring home. Massey made the comment one time "Do you think Barbara could buy softer toilet paper?" That thought has never crossed the boy's minds...they are just grateful to not rely totally on "shakin it."
Worked a double shift today and when I went back for dinner we had two big parties to set up for. Len had me show a new hire how to set up one of the rooms for a party of ten. We have glass tables that we arrange in one long table for parties and as I was carefully (obviously not) putting the tables together I turned one of the tables and it BARELY glanced the other and exploded in my hands. It shattered in a million pieces...and by the small cut on my forearm wonder why they call it safety glass? I was mortified. Len heard the noise...along with everyone else in the restaurant. He came into the room , looked at the new girl who was more shocked than me and simply said "We're getting rid of her anyway...Hey Kelly, when's your last day?"
All the other servers helped me sweep up the glass, which went every where and in every direction. When I went to the restroom I put my hand in my apron to get out my lip gloss and found about two more pounds of broken glass. Thank the Lord Barbara wasn't there and we had it all cleaned up by the time she returned to work. When I saw her come back in I immediately said "Len broke one of the glass tables while you were gone." The snap of her head and the look on her face reminded me of the "RINK! RINK! RINK! RINK!" music from the shower scene in the movie Psycho and I quickly confessed.
These two people have been such a saving grace to me and my family , took me under their wing and into their hearts at a time when I so desperately needed it and have helped me countless times over the past year. So it took me over a year to destroy one of their glass tables...considering my luck it was bound to happen!
I finally returned my brother's car today...he loaned it to us for a couple of weeks last year and I returned it today . He uses it as his weekend car and we have run it to death. The steel belts were showing on both front tires and I couldn't send it back that way, considering as seldom as he would have driven it they would have lasted another two years. Being the awesome (not) sister I am... I had two used tires put on and balanced put twenty bucks worth of gas in it and took it back to his apartment while he was out of town. I felt like Bill Murray in Caddy Shack slinking away from the golf course after attempting to blow up the gopher with disastrous results.
So life appears to be returning to normal...not that I know what normal is anymore. I am assuming it is the state between frazzled yet keeping it all together , surrounded by Divine intervention and the love of a whole bunch of people.
Sounds good to me!
Til next time....COTTON
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