Now It Makes Sense...

 I am so relieved that all the graduation hoop-la is finally over, not as glad as Zach's teachers I am sure... but pretty giddy about it.

Zach tried not to look happy (click on photo) but I know he felt good, I know I did, especially after no one from the faculty or administration booed when his name was called.

I recently finished a great book my sister gave me to read..."Cutting For Stone." It had nothing to do with my family or situation... It was about two brothers growing up in Ethiopia, but I came across a passage almost at the very end of the book and was dumbstruck. It describes Zach perfectly. As soon as I read it I  read it again and then once more.

Now it all makes sense!

"He is...very different. A genius some would say. But not in the usual way. Impatient with school. He'd never answer an exam question in a way that might make him pass, not because he didn't know...He has never understood the need to subscribe to convention."

That's going to be on his headstone in ninety years if I have MY way about it...and will be a stipulation in my will. Don't fulfill my wishes  and see if you get any of the crap from my attic that my grandmother gave me when she cleaned out the crap from HER attic after my mother refused to bring it home.

 Once my mother died, every time my sister or I would go to Mema's she would force things on us when we left. Sometimes it was something you would WANT to take with you, like her fried chicken wrapped up in what Papa called "alumeum" foil. Most of the time it was pot holders made on those square frames with the teeth all around them or a random candle stick. She was always good for a King Edward cigar box full of S&H green stamps or a bag of circus peanuts...those big orange peanut shaped  treats that taste like stale marshmallows. Sometimes she would send us home with bamboo calenders from ten years back but the flip side had a pretty Japanese print on it. I still have her dining room chairs that I sat in as a kid, one of the chairs has a burn mark on it where Papa's cigar probably sat too long.

Our family passes crap from generation to generation like others pass on rare jewelry or heirlooms. These things may be crap but it is OUR crap and are OUR family heirlooms.

I have had a good life. I have had an unusual life. I am still having a life...that's batting 500 to me.

We are a crazy eclectic bunch here on our Cotton plantation. We have had many bountiful years and survived some recent Bo-Weevil infestations but still all have balls of Cotton thanks to some pretty amazing "Leach's."

Tim's been gone all week and I don't know who is happier, him or Ham?

Ham (my big boxer) is my steadfast body guard. He hates it when Tim rubs my shoulders or touches me in general. He would tear someone apart if they even pushed me...the boy KNOWS who gives him that fresh water and food every day! He spoons me at night and when I wake with a hot flash he hops off the bed to let me cool off (I kid you not.). He probably gets tired of my night sweats getting his coat wet.

Charlie stays in his stud cave under my bed and my guard has his back to mine ...when I finally DO sleep it is knowing that I am more protected than Fort Knox.
Why does Tim's snoring bother me so much when I LIKE to hear the dogs kick off a tune...you know when they have dreams and do that little  paw jerking motion and sound like they are hyperventilating and just as suddenly relax, blow out their nose and peacefully drop back into a deep sleep?

I wanna be a dog.
I could handle the ticks til my humans notice them and pull them out with a blown out match stuck to it and and tweezers.
I'd just need a flea collar and a semi clean toilet to drink out of.

 This has been a heck of a day. I had to have Zach at the courthouse by 8:30 for the ticket he got when he totaled my Passat. It amazes me that they charged him $229.00 for wrecking MY car.
Let me get this right...the county makes $229.00 for MY son wrecking MY car...seems like the wrong people got paid unless they plan on forwarding that money directly to me. At least Zach paid it himself , begrudgingly counting out the bills.

I felt bad and stopped on the way back to the house to buy him some new gauze and ointment for the last remaining oozing wounds from his long board accident.
Then I went and had the oil changed and my tires rotated because I am driving down to reclaim my daughter who thinks she lives in Florida now.

Went and floated check for the mortgage (It'll be good tomorrow) but the gas and power got paid yesterday so even if it bounces I call it a win win situation....for a $25 charge we have air, a stove , hot water and a house to use it all in.

After I left Wells Fartgo  (HUGE pun intended) I got on the highway and headed to the State DMV by the airport to meet the clown who signed the wrong name on the title of my car when we bought it. "I smell a used car salesman!" I was actually impressed that he showed up. He had to drive down from a county a couple of hours away. Guess that "Don't make me go all Bee-Otch on ya" voice still works!

Sitting in that place was another thing all together...I felt like I was in line at Ellis Island. There were hundreds of people there. Women in burkas, guys with Rasta hats, boys with pants on the ground and old men in wife beaters dragging the beaten wife along with them in her size eight spandex stretched over her size 24 boo-tay. The guy I met to handle the title issue had on old Levi's and a white tee shirt. He actually looked like he would have been pretty cute about ten years and forty pounds back. As we waited for over an hour and a half for our number to be called  an older black gentleman strutted into the circus arena. He had on a pink and white pin striped seersucker suit complete with matching vest and matching brim cocked to the side. His berry colored wing tips were shined and his cane looked like something FDR attempted to walk with.

I looked over at my new buddy (the one paying for the title) and  said "You'd look good in an outfit like that." He still paid for the title...probably just to get rid of me.

Flew back to Newnan running twenty minutes late for work. I had been in my little car from 8:30 until 5:00 with the top down and the sun GETTIN' down...ninety two degrees. "I LOVE it!"

Got to work and I was roasted...thank The Lord my mom had some Indian in her. Changed out of my shorts and tank top and put on my work uniform that I like to call "My sweatsuit." Barb was sitting at the bar and had some new cocktails the bartenders and she had come up with. I tossed back one and she said "You were supposed to take a sip." Then the bottom fell out. We were busier than a bee hive and between my day in the car/sun and slamming back a cocktail...or two, I got some serious pay back...and PAY CHECK!

Sun all day...hot flashes and no food other than one Krystal at ten in the morning made for a long night but a profitable one.

Finally home, recovering from my slam session with Zach, my State experience and work being crazy busy.

You know what?

I gotta good stinkin' life. I mean I might stink right NOW, but after soaking in a bath and sleeping off slamming Barb's new drinks down...I got a LOT done today.

Four more shifts at work and I am headed to the beach! Thinking about picking up a pink and white seersucker mu mu with a matching kerchief while I am there.

Til next time...CRAZY COTTON