Getting Started Back on the Climb of Life

I awoke this morning expecting a call from my new job saying "Come on in and let's get you started." After 10:00 I was pretty sure it wasn't going to be today and returned to that steaming hot shower and called out to Dr. Bombay once again...neither he or Aunt Clara appeared so I knew I was own my own again.

I decided to go by the Dept. of Labor to file for unemployment "Just in case" but was blown away by the fifty people in front of me trying to squeeze in the door out of the cold morning air. Thinking that I was most likely starting a new job in the next day or two I left as five more people tried to squeeze into the warmth of the lobby.

Next stop was for food stamps.

I have never imagined that even in a million years I would need to know where to go for food stamps but I thought that the WIC office was a good place to start. I scooted my 85lbs. into half a seat sharing it with a toddler that kept getting up and down (she didn't seem to mind me) and signed in at the front desk. When the woman called my name my face went red but I quickly realized no one else even looked up, much less AT me. The woman asked for my case number and I told her I had never been there before. I said I was there for food assistance and she said they would call me back shortly.

Back to my half seat I went...thinking at least the toddler didn't seem to recognize me as a former waitress of hers.

Called to the window again I was told to come down the hall to the second desk. Gladly leaving the "day care center" called a waiting room I shut the door behind me...just like the sign said to (in English AND Spanish.)

The woman asked me if I was pregnant and I almost laughed for the first time today. I told her my story and said I needed to apply for assistance. She asked the ages of my children and I told her..."A girl 14 going on 30 and a boy, 17 going on 12."

She said unfortunately none of those ages were acceptable at WIC and I needed to go to DFACS.

Directions in hand I waved bye to my seat partner in the 'Day care center" and left.

Next stop was much more pleasant...if you can call going to apply for food stamps a pleasant experience.

There was a bulletin board filled with job postings and I was copying down all the ones that I thought may apply to my husband when I heard my name being called out AGAIN over an intercom. Lucky for me I was the only person in the waiting area that understood English ... my name didn't seem to stick out to any one and I felt better about it.

I'll have to hand it to this office...the woman I spoke with was tremendously polite and reassuring....I guess me breaking into tears the moment I began to speak may have had something to do with it.

It's an embarrassing thing having to ask for help when you are 49 years old.

It's a worse thing to do nothing to try and help your family.

I told her I had worked since I was 15 years old, been paying into the system every pay check ... just thought I would see if maybe I was eligible to maybe start drawing on that for a while til we got back on our feet.

She was awesome...she didn't blink an eye when I told her how much (little) I had in the bank and told her of my husband's woe's compiled by the separation notice of my own that I held in my hand.

She had me fill out a form, told me she would give it to her best case worker and we would go from there. I hated asking but "heck" when you're already sitting in a chair in a DFACS office, what's modesty? I asked how long it would take and she said normally 30 days but with our dire situation she could almost guarantee we would receive a card in 10 days.

I felt 20 lbs. heavier when I left that office (and that's a GOOD thing.)

I had to stop and get a quart of oil on the way home at a gas station (not the best section of town) and the woman in front of me in line was telling the cashier she was headed to talk to the "Investigators" because her best friend had killed her boy. My heart sank. I've often said "I could KILL Zach" but never meant it in my wildest dreams. They kept on chatting and it came out her "BOY" was her boyfriend who she had stabbed after he beat her. I noticed as she paid for her items that it was two blounts and a quart of Malt Liquor. Good luck on THAT interview...

So once again I realized that I AM pretty lucky.

I'm marching into my new digs tomorrow and saying "Thought I would come by and pick up a menu and get started on learning the menu and wine list...just to get a jump on my training."

What a day! What an eye opening experience and just the thing I needed to let myself know I was STILL one of the lucky ones.

Whatever life throws you way always remember...IT COULD ALWAYS BE WORSE.

Once again keep me in your prayers and I'll keep sending up ones of my own.

On a brighter note I got an email today from a regular customer from my old job that made me smile made me cry and made my day. It meant the world to me.



When I went to leave the DFACS office this morning the woman helping me handed me a sheet of paper and told me to take it with me as well. When I got home and looked over all the papers she had given me... the last sheet she had given me read:




"NEVER BE DISCOURAGED"

There is really nothing we need to know
Or even try to understand.

If we refuse to be discouraged
And trust God's Guiding Hand...

So take heart and meet each minute
With faith in God's Great Love,

Aware that every day of life
Is controlled by God above...

And never dread tomorrow
Or what the future brings,

Just pray for strength and courage
And trust God in all things...

And never grow discouraged
Be patient and just wait.

For "God never comes too early
And He never comes too late!"



DANG!! Now I have ONE more person to repay... This poem is now on my refrigerator right next to my lucky charms. At least I remember the woman's name and once I get back up those steps and back on the track...she will be one of the people on my long list of people to Thank and Thank and Thank.

CAST THY BURDEN UPON THE LORD,
AND HE SHALL SUSTAIN THEE...
Psalm 55:22

Til next time...CATCHIN' UP COTTON