There is a season (Turn, Turn, Turn)
And a time to every purpose, under Heaven
A time to be born, a time to die
A time to plant, a time to reap
A time to kill, a time to heal
A time to laugh, a time to weep
To Everything (Turn, Turn, Turn)
There is a season (Turn, Turn, Turn)
And a time to every purpose, under Heaven
A time to build up,a time to break down
A time to dance, a time to mourn
A time to cast away stones, a time to gather stones together
To Everything (Turn, Turn, Turn)
There is a season (Turn, Turn, Turn)
And a time to every purpose, under Heaven
A time of love, a time of hate
A time of war, a time of peace
A time you may embrace, a time to refrain from embracing
To Everything (Turn, Turn, Turn)
There is a season (Turn, Turn, Turn)
And a time to every purpose, under Heaven
A time to gain, a time to lose
A time to mend, a time to sew
A time for love, a time for hate
A time for peace, I swear it's not too late."
Four years ago we were making over six figures and had $14,000 in savings. Today we live day by day, paycheck to paycheck. I have been blessed with and taken care of by so many family members, friends and even strangers that somehow we have survived. We still have problems and still have a long way to go...but we are STILL here!
I checked my bank account the other night after I got home from another depressing shift and found I had bounced a check I had all intentions of covering with a great night at work the previous shift...which didn't happen and the domino effect started. I sat at the kitchen table alone and cried like a baby. I thought to myself "How am I going to make it?" I'm almost 53 and living like a bag lady with a really nice shopping cart with a roof on top.
I caved and sent my brother a text asking for help. Surprised he hadn't changed his number or blocked mine, he text back and said to come by the next day.
I woke up the next morning with eye lids that looked like I had silicone injected into them and after a quick glance in the mirror determined crying doesn't help one bit and seem to make gray hair grow even quicker.
Before I went to my brother's house the next morning my husband mentioned he'd read on the "know it all" Facebook that a friend of ours from high school lost their twenty two year old son the night before from a seizure.
This stopped me in my tracks. This humbled me beyond belief. It made me count not only my blessings but my kids...yes they were all accounted for.
I'm crying over having no money when these friends are crying over not having their son.
God is Large and in charge. He must have greater plans for this kid, which is wonderful but hard to understand with our small puny human reasoning. How can you lose a child and ever get over it? It would be a feat to even learn to live with it!
These parents will have to...and to think I sat crying at my kitchen table over a couple of bills.
The only bright spot, if you can find one is God took him home quickly. He didn't suffer with cancer, he didn't linger or waste away slowly, he didn't lose his mind and become someone they couldn't communicate with and they didn't become parents he no longer recognized.
My brother was right when he said that our own family was lucky..."We always take the express check out." Both our parents died quickly. One in a matter of seconds and the other in a matter of days.
That's the way to go if ya gotta go. GO ON! Go on to your glory and go on to your reward.
The hurt doesn't diminish and the pain is still like a knife to the heart but that's the way it works when you are left here on the tumultuous soil of this earth. You just learn minute by minute, hour by hour and day by day how to live with it and struggle on.
They have gone on to glory and their reward...They have walked through the pearly gates and their hurt is no more. It's OUR hurt we have to deal with.
I will never cry over bills again or lack of money again. I will never worry about petty things even if they seem huge and looming in my tiny mind.
I will wake up every day and feel grateful to have woken up. I've said it before and will say it again..."Life is but this VERY instant moment in time."
No guarantees, no "Do overs."
This kid obviously got it right the first time. It will be tremendously hard for his loved ones but they need to keep in mind, he is gone on to a much greater glory. I hope he tells both my parents, the parents of all my friends and the loved ones we are still missing that we all love them... but are glad they have reached the place where we all hope to join them one glorious day!
Peace be with these parents and my prayers are with them.
Til next time...COTTON
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