Monday, November 4, 2013

Shut The Front Door...Literally!

I can feel it coming. Winter, my least favorite season. It doesn't help I skitter across parking lots when the wind blows too hard but simply don't like being cold. I know this goes against all my gripes about hot flashes...I'm beginning to think they are God's way of keeping me warm through the winter months.

Simply stated, there is no happy medium or season for a menopausal woman. You  can keep the heat turned down to 67 in your house yet still wake up several times a night soaked in sweat and none of them involve romance. But as soon as you kick off the covers and the sweats begin to stop you grab for the covers and snuggle under... and it feels wonderful, for about a hour.

It's like 'shampoo, rinse, repeat' all night long except you wake up in the morning with your hair matted to your head.

My sweats don't bother me  too much during the day, especially in summer months because I love working in the yards and don't mind the sweating. I end up the day wrung out like a dish rag but my yard looks great and gives me a satisfying feeling of accomplishment.

Waking up every hour on the hour during the night...not so much.

When I am at work at the restaurant and begin  to have sweats I tell myself it could be worse. I could be a cook standing on  the other side of the expo line in front of three ovens set on 450 degrees and three open flame  char grills. I immediately feel cooler. It's  the only time I feel sorry  for cooks.

My gripe is when it is too cold to work in the yards, too cold to sit out back with the pups, too cold to sit and read my book in the hammock...and even my hot flashes can't keep me warm.

Weren't women punished enough with "The curse"? Weren't women punished enough when God determined  we would be the sex to push a human being out of an orifice the size of the diameter of a pencil and then expected to take it home two days later and be a momma?

I think if you manage to  push a human being out of your body, there should be an immediate six month round the world cruise you  board while the father stays home and learns how to be  'baby daddy'. That's  the least he can do, and at least it doesn't hurt him to sit on a hard chair.

Seems I've strayed away from night sweats and dug up repressed feelings. I must be having a really severe hot flash.

Yes I have a great, wonderful husband and he is a good father, but know and recognize some male limitations ladies.

I told a young co-worker at work tonight who was having problems with her boyfriend three really important rules about relationships.

Number one, if they are really a man, they're not going to change much...they are a stubborn breed. Some change some don't. You're taking a chance.
Number two, the more you  do for a man the more he will let you do.
Number three, never settle...wait to fall in love and know he loves you even more. That one will be the keeper and you will grow old together, no matter what.

I waited for number three.

Dang, maybe I should be a marriage guru!

I haven't broken out in a sweat in over two hours so know I'm due.

Back to my original gripe, I hate cold weather, even if it helps with my hot flashes.

Winter months to me seem like  eating in a Waffle House, wishing you had brought your sweatshirt. The food is okay  but won't last too long in your goose pimpled  body and  you're glad when you get out of there.

Hurry back Spring !

Til next  time...COTTON

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