I have been emailing my Mother's best friend for a few months on a semi regular basis.
My Mother died when I was seventeen...It still can devastate me at any given moment in my life...She was THAT great of a person.
Her best friend is another great person. (My Mom knew how to pick them). I know that I shouldn't capitalize the word "mother"...but in MY book, she is definitely an ALL CAPS TYPE OF WOMAN!!
After my Mother died in August of 1977, I fell into a fog that grew thick around me for about twenty years (at least it seemed that long).
But in December of that same year, my Mom's friend came to take me to see the "Nutcracker" at the fabulous FOX Theatre in Atlanta. It was a wonderful night and when taking me back home,we sat in her car for at least an hour talking, crying and hugging ....and most importantly leaving me with the feeling that my Mom had left me in quite capable hands.
We spoke rarely after that, only at get-togethers, weddings and unfortunately funerals.
Sometimes I felt jealous that this woman still had all three of her girls and a husband to boot. Why couldn't I be SO lucky?
In the past few months of emails and a marvelous visit to her house one Sunday, I realized what she had on what I considered her "Silver Platter." Her husband ...her sweetheart...her soul mate, was fading away from her...she had gone from girlfriend to wife to mother, a grand mother...and back to a mother. She is the primary care giver to her husband. He has suffered a heart attack, Diabetes, memory loss, and the ability to drive a car.
She coddles him and corrects him...she is the total reason that he can live in the comfort of their home and enjoy what little peace he can sometimes find and can always have at his disposal whenever it will come to his welcome mind.
Growing old isn't easy...I can attest to that fact only being in my late forties. But the total immense feeling of love and most definite admiration for this woman absolutely bowl me over.
She still looks amazing, dresses to the nines and has a better memory than mine (and I pride myself on my memory). She is as sharp as a tack...and has even let me call her "MOM" in my emails to her.
Maybe that is why God took my Mom so early...so I wouldn't have to watch any demise of the GRAND vision that I had of her. Maybe that is why God took my Dad so quickly...he knew that my Mother wasn't there to take care of him. Maybe that is why my Mother's best friend is here...fully aware, full of life...able to take care of her husband and to take care of me.
She has been handed quite a load and has handled it most magnificently. Her husband will most probably last many more years (If my prayers do ANY good)...but even if he doesn't...thanks to her it has been a dignified, happy and content life... and one that he wouldn't change one bit.
She is a saint in my eyes and a MOTHER in my heart. Like I said before...my Mom could "Pick"Em".
So I have lost both of my parents; that IS a tragedy... but this family is helping their Dad have the best love care and devotion that a family can provide. I can see the love in his eyes...I can see the ole "GLINT" in his eye when he talks to me.
What I will always see is a family that is more my own that they would probably like. They are my back up, they are my saving grace on this Earth.
The memories and recollections are too vast and numerous...they flood my mind like a a bitter sweet swollen river...let the waters of my time with them always wash over me like a cool refreshing memory of childhood and my lifetime of knowing and loving these special people in my life.
You never know what the next year may bring...advancement in technology, miraculous improvements or just the smiling face of GOD telling us it will be OK...or not.
But you know what? We will deal whatever hand we are dealt. Do we really have a choice?
This woman, this friend of mine...is an inspiration to me. She is up for the battle and she is there for the fight. I hope...no I KNOW , that her husband knows that he is the luckiest man on Earth. I feel fortunate to come in right behind him, his daughters and the grandkids. Right now it feels like one lucky place to be... IN HER HEART! My gracious thanks go out to her...and to my Mom for knowing where to leave me. Till next time....COTTON
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