Thursday, July 20, 2017

Ashes To Ashes

Tough week around here. Our kids lost two grandmothers in less than a week.

First was Elizabeth. Not a blood grandmother but pretty darn close. She was my Diddy's companion for years, right up until he died in 2002. We remained close with her and my kids grew up thinking of her as their own grandmother. Healthy as an ox and vibrant into her late eighties, when her body began to fail her while her mind remained sharp as a tack, which turned out to be more of a curse than a blessing. She knew what was happening and am sure it tormented her daily. She had a horrible ending to a wonderful life and I was glad when God finally took her home.

Then less than a week later, Tim's mother died after a long battle with cancer. I was glad for her to be taken as well and certainly know she was.

She weighed even less than me when she died and was bedridden for a year, if not more. Her mind was also sharp. Pretty sad stories.

Although sad to lose them both, am so very grateful both are hurting no more. To be trapped in a broken body with a fully functioning mind must be awful to endure. You're simply waiting to die with plenty of time to think about it as you watch the clock on the wall slowly tick off the minutes remaining of your life.

I've thought about them both pretty much non stop this past week. The memories of them are all wonderful, except for they way they both died...not soon enough, considering their physical conditions.

Oh to be a Leach.

I've mentioned many times before that my family, the Leach family, takes the express checkout. My mother died at forty eight in less than thirty seconds. My Diddy, in excellent health, died in ten days at the age of seventy seven from West Nile virus.

If you gotta go, that's the way...short and sweet.

"Somewhere, a journey begins at the end of the worldly existence we know.
Somewhere, a path stretches over the stars, and rivers of memories flow.
Somewhere, a silence is heard far away and the brightness of day fills the night.
Where the trials of life are resolved into peace when a soul finds its way to the light."

Our new next door neighbors came over last night with a hot casserole and sympathy card which said the above.


Trials of life were resolved into peace and their souls found their way to the light.

I kinda feel like we ought to be giving them both a party, not a funeral.

I wrote my sister back home in Georgia a lengthy letter last night. I ran two pens dry writing it, not kidding. Granted neither pen was brand new, but still says something. I won't bore you with it all but a few things really stuck in my mind while writing them to her.

"I Thank God every day I was born a Leach. You and Chris are the best thing our parents ever gave me and were excellent with their uncanny foresight. Our parents always led by example. For all we've been through, for all we've lacked but somehow always gotten, makes me realize is totally all because we were born into the Leach family. It's a wonderful name to have."

I couldn't love my sibs more if you held a gun to my head...literally.

Of course, don't give them a gun, I'm the needy sib and they may want to cut their losses.

All of this comes about because of how much I've always wanted my own three kids to feel that same bond.

But they didn't.

Not at first. They fought like crazy and pointed fingers constantly. They formed alliances, sometimes switching teams. Massey and Zach went about five years without speaking to each other, except to say something ugly. TJ is the oldest so he (finally) came around first.

Massey is the youngest but grew up before Zach did. Boys take the long route.

It's taken until the past year, literally, but have finally started to and furiously.

Now I'm the outsider!

bitch, please.

But that's fine too. I just wanted my kids to feel the same way about each other like I feel about my two sibs.

Then, low and behold...

Just like that, it happened.

No more bickering.

Bickering was been replaced with unwavering support of each other in whatever path each one of them are choosing to pursue in life.

 With all said and done up to this point in my life, I'm a very lucky woman.

Have I had some tough times?

Who hasn't?

Have I ever felt abandoned?

Nope. Not once.

I took a few (lot of) steps back then took baby steps forward, which landed me in a different state and a fish out of water. (small pun)

At least we moved near to my brother after moving away from my sister. As long as I have one of my sibs close by, I'm okay.

Till next time, COTTON

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