A blog about anything or sometimes about nothing. A place for me to write and post my feelings or opinions on things ranging from parenting to waiting tables to living in America to daily observations and my personal experiences. Sometimes I just want to give people a humorous read and make them laugh at the end of a trying day.
Day three of my resolution "Try being happy" and still in the game.
Tim and Massey got back from their visit to Georgia around five and had dinner ready by six thirty. My momma's awesome meatloaf recipe (best ever). Asparagus casserole, mashed potatoes and yeast rolls, compliments of Sister Shubert.
No dinner is complete without bread in my book.
Then Tim dropped the bombshell.
He had dinner last night with Zach and his girlfriend?
What the Hey?
No wonder he doesn't need me, he has another woman bossing him around now.
Apparently life goes on.
DUH.
If only I had Zach and my sister living here... would be the total Utopia.
Instead I will creep on my younger son via social networking and continue to stay positive. I'll talk to my sister as much as I can on the phone and FB as well. I'm too stupid at my age to figure out Instagram or Snapchat and have no interest in learning. Learning Pandora wore me out.
When life throws you a curve ball, whack it out of the park.
I look at these pictures. The pictures of my life. Some are there yet we are here.
I got home from work tonight pretty exhausted, having worked the past six days straight. I came in the door and immediately turned on Pandora with my new Bose speaker cranked. Music keeps me company.The first song to come on was Tiny Dancer.
Then just as immediately thought about my younger son, Zach who still lives in Georgia. It's one of his favorite songs and think about him every time I hear it. He moved down here with us only to turn around four days later and move back. He was one homesick boy, that's for sure, which only made me even more homesick.
I've seen him one time since the end of September, for two hours at my sister's house on Thanksgiving Day.
When he left, bet I hugged him for an entire sixty seconds and tighter than ever have before.
My road with Zachary has been a long and winding one with many obstacles to deal with and overcome. There were times I wondered if he would ever grow up? Then suddenly he did.
I fought more battles with, for and even against Zach than either of my other two kids but turned out to be worth every wrinkle and every gray hair.
When grown kids are living with you, can drive you crazy. When they leave, drives you even crazier. (not much of a stretch for me)
He's surprised me to say the very least. He's done okay on his own and survived without me.
I should (and do) feel proud but is almost like I wanted him to need me.
But he hasn't.
This boy...
has grown up and doesn't need mom anymore.
And to think I thought raising kids was tough.
Letting them go is tougher.
Mama told me when I was young
"Come sit beside me, my only son
And listen closely to what I say
And if you do this it'll help you some sunny day"
"Oh, take your time, don't live too fast
Troubles will come and they will pass
You'll find a woman and you'll find love
And don't forget, son, there is someone up above"
"And be a simple kind of man
Oh, be something you love and understand
Baby be a simple kind of man
Oh, won't you do this for me, son, if you can"
"Forget your lust for the rich man's gold
All that you need is in your soul
And you can do this, oh baby, if you try
All that I want for you, my son, is to be satisfied"
"And be a simple kind of man
Oh, be something you love and understand
Baby be a simple kind of man
Oh, won't you do this for me, son, if you can"
Oh yes, I will
"Boy, don't you worry, you'll find yourself
Follow your heart and nothing else
And you can do this, oh baby, if you try
All that I want for you, my son, is to be satisfied"
"And be a simple kind of man
Oh, be something you love and understand
Baby be a simple kind of man
Oh, won't you do this for me, son, if you can"
Baby, be a simple, really simple man
Oh, be something you love and understand.
Zach's a simple man, and mean that in the best sense of the word. Webster's definition of simple is dead on:
"Not involved or complicated; easy. Being without additions or modifications; mere"
He hasn't asked for anything since going back to Georgia. That kind of hurt too.
I was sure he'd need my help.
So essentially am happy for him but kind of sad for me.
I sent all his Christmas presents to him with Tim and Massey when they drove up to Georgia this past weekend. Of course never heard from him, but really didn't expect to. That's a boy for you.
Keeping my New Year resolution and staying positive.
Trust me, he'll need me again one day. And I'll be there.
All my New Year resolutions can be summed up in three words: "Try being happy."
Today was a good start.
Opened cans of greens and B eyed peas and nuked them. I did actually make rice, deviled eggs and buttermilk cornbread, topping it off with heating a couple of Smithfield smoked chops. Packed some leftovers in my trusty lunch box and headed into work at three thirty.
The good thing about being here alone is didn't even feel bad about leaving some dishes in the sink for washing after work. My dogs rarely complain.
I imagined it would be slow at work, and was.
Funny thing about Floridians, the minute the sun sets they set out!
I was a selling machine. Every single table was awesome and had some really interesting conversation with several guests. I was selling bottles of wine right and left and peeps were eating like they were starved.
One of my last tables was two really sweet Hispanic women, who looked like sisters (I should have asked) but enjoyed a bottle of Pinot and several items to share. Near the end of the meal one of them said " I can tell you're not from here but don't tell us where you're from, let me guess."
I expected her to guess "Mayberry" or "Hooterville."
She guessed Australia.
I moved the wine glass away and told her she was cut off.
I told her I was from the south side of Atlanta, born and bred. I said completely changed my articulation and pronunciation when serving so I didn't sound like the Clampett I really was.
It's funny, that's the second time someone asked if I was from Australia when serving them.
Yes, I speak like a hick (and constantly reminded of it by my brother) but when pay is involved I totally slow down, speak and enunciate the proper way.
I told the two women had recently relocated after my husband was transferred to Orlando. One asked if I missed Atlanta?
Whenever someone asks me that, I immediately tear up.
I'm almost fifty seven and spent fifty six of them in the same state and area. Essentially, I moved away from my entire life.
I told them was slowly adjusting but was hard at my age, leaving my younger son and sister behind.
They both agreed it was different here.
The demographics have totally changed for me.
Case in point.
My sister, who miss more than I can express sent me this on FB today.
"Prospero Año Nuevo, Mi Hermana (as they say in Orlando)."
I replied with "Party like a MoFo (as they say in Atlanta)."
Her reply?
"Dang I miss you."
If my sister was here, would totally be fine.
But she isn't.
Cindayy.
It's my catch 22.
My brother lives here, my oldest son lives here. We live here but my youngest son and my more than just a sister still live in Atlanta.
It's going to take some adjusting to, but adjust I will.
This is my life and this is where I live now.
It's not going to change so I have to...and will.
It was a shaky start with the whole job transfer debacle (still not letting that one go and seeking legal counsel) but finally feel confident at my new job and think am a pretty good addition to the team.
My money increases each and every week at work and is a very positive sign.
I need to do the same.
Be more positive.
It may take a minute or two more...but I got this.
I'm beginning to feel better and more like myself each and every day.
At least Massey pulled my hair through that excruciating highlight cap and blonded me up before jumping in the car with her dad to go back to Georgia for a three day visit, sans me.
It didn't help when I learned sleet and snow was in the forecast for Atlanta tonight and tomorrow.
I was scheduled for work at four thirty but went to Wally World first and bought a can of collard greens, a can of black eyed peas and smoked pork chops for tomorrow. I can't remember a New Year's Day when I haven't had them and sure wasn't breaking tradition.
I need all the luck I can get.
We had 260 reservations on the books at work and thought I would never make it home until midnight or later.
I told my manager wasn't worried about partying, but our dogs were home alone and more worried about fireworks and how they would take them, especially our blind dog.
Once we got through most of the reservations he came up to me and said "Leave but go quietly."
How awesome was that?
The fireworks started booming five minutes after I got home and haven't stopped yet.
Aren't they intended for midnight?
Kudos for this dog!
I've been a basket case since moving to Orlando.
I lost my job and insurance, left my home of over twenty years and wound up in a tiny rental house with a tiny back yard with flamingos and seemingly pelicans and whatever else they are baiting my dogs from fifty feet away with a four foot fence between them.
Yep.
That's sounds about right for me.
Here's what changed my mindset.
I'm the new old kid on the block at work. I struggled at first and sometimes still do, but have never been late or ever called out. I work from the time I clock in until the time I clock out.
That's one thing which has paid off.
I have a great job.
Does it pay like my old one?
No.
But lucky for me doesn't have to. I make what I need and then some, but am in on the ground floor of something great.
My resolution for the New Year is to be grateful.
Am I where I want to be?
Not yet.
Can I get there?
Most certainly.
I know my daughter feels lost too.
But here's the thing.
Hello 2017.
It's been a tough few months but know how much is catapulting us to the next level.
We're here now. This is our home.
In six months will buying our forever home.
Haven't found it yet but when we do will be an awesome place to live and visit.
We were already having Christmas at my brother's house this year with all but four of our family joining us in Orlando.
About a month ago my husband mentioned that my brother, Chris was turning sixty this year. His birthday is December 27 so pretty much gets screwed every birthday and usually receives a held back Christmas present, usually wrapped in Santa Claus paper.
Chris has totally taken over the role of pseudo father after our own Diddy died in 2002. He's taken excellent care of his two needy sisters and even taken care of our sometimes needy kids. He let my husband stay with him (rent free) for almost a year when Tim got transferred to Orlando long before I joined. He even took my husband's brother in for a time when he needed it.
If there's one thing I can say about my brother which no sane person could possibly deny is:
Chris Leach is a stand up guy.
Tim said we should throw Chris a surprise party while the family was still here from Georgia.
Massey (my free secretary) set up a private event, blocking only Chris from seeing on Facebook and included every person we could think of.
We planned the surprise attack, for the day before his birthday.
Tim told Chris he wanted to take him out to play golf as part of his Christmas present the day after Christmas and included my nehew and brother in law.
Of course being needy sisters we are, went the cheap route and bought hot dogs, buns and chips. Cindy made some side dishes and I did as well. We'd asked others to just bring a side dish or some beer or wine.
Massey and I went over a couple of hours before and we all decorated his house, complete with streamers, balloons and strung lights around his back porch and back of the house.
We hung a Happy Birthday banner on his front gate to see when he pulled in the drive from golfing and greeted him saying we'd all decided to give him a small family party while we were all still there.
The first car pulled in ten minutes later. A work friend of Chris' along with his wife and daughters. They simply acted like they had just dropped by to say hello.
Chris, always the ultimate host took them all out for a ride in his boat on the lake.
When they got back, three other friends had suddenly decided to drop by to visit.
Then another friend of his happened to show up but by that time, Chris knew.
A few more friends showed up, then the bomb dropped when this crazy guy walked in the door after driving seven hours just to attend.
More friends arrived and is best described as "One liquored up event."
Massey and I Ubered back to our house a little before eleven. Tim stayed and slept in a chair. And yes there is a picture of that floating around the Internet as well.
The Birthday Boy seemed to have a good time too.
I can only think of two people who deserve this kind of party. One is my brother and one is my sister.
If not for them, would've never made it this far in my life.
And that's a fact.
I can only think of one person luckier.
Me.
Sounds like a soap opera, but's our true story. Our momma collapsed and died in under thirty seconds from a brain aneurysm while out school shopping with Cindy and me in 1977. Diddy died from West Nile virus in less than ten days in 2002.
We went from this...
to this.
Then somehow ended up like this.
A tangled web of love.
Love is all you need.
I've had more than my fair share.
They love me because I'm their sister.
I laugh because there's nothing they can do about it.
