Smile Because You Can

 Not that I look particularly good at fifty five but sure look better with a smile on my face. It makes me feel better too.

Four years ago was the roughest...and the best. I was starting over in a new job after almost fourteen with  my last one. My husband was out of work and we were out of savings. He found two part time low wage jobs and worked both while I plowed full steam ahead into my new one working every day of the week for months on end.

It's the closest we've ever coming to sinking but didn't, with help from many around us and a Huge One above us.

A few of us from my old place had a get together at my new place...it made me smile. I was still ticked at my former company for firing me, sending us spiraling further into the red abyss but was wonderful to spend a night with all the peeps from there who really loved me.

"Love is all you need"

It's not a quote but a fact...trust me.

We took the long and winding road but somehow someway with someone and plenty of others have finally reached the black again.

Looking back I don't feel embarrassed we were pretty poor, I feel lucky we were able to not only survive but thrive.
We're not rolling in dough yet but not chasing down the utilities man before he drives off after hanging a cut off notice on our door either and giving him a bad check to keep the lights on.

I've never been happier or more successful in a job than the one I have now and pretty much sure Tim feels the same way about his.

We have a thousand mile buffer between us for a year to let all ill feelings and pent up frustration go away. We talk more now than we did when he lived here and all conversations are pleasantly light and upbeat.

God had this in His plan for all of us.

We've learned humility and also learned how much we are all loved.

My kids all know the true value of a dollar now and just how quickly all can be taken away. They've seen their parents struggle and learned what commitment to a marriage  is all about. For all the hard times and all the tense moments we never gave up or never gave in. We're in it to win it and will do it together, every step of the way.

We can answer our phone again.

I think we went an entire year without picking up when it rang. We knew we were in debt and certainly didn't need to hear them remind us...that's a total bummer. Trust me, I thought about it twenty four seven and so did my husband.

With hard work and the determination of fire ants we fought the fight and have begun to win the battle.

Touche'

I wake up every day now with a sense of accomplishment and total gratitude. I still have bad days, but pretty sure even the Kardashians have bad (hair) days too.

If I could change the last five years, wouldn't for a million dollars. (maybe a small exaggeration)

I don't need a "Do-over"... just the ability to "Do".

We're all in good health and now even have health care plans. We've started saving again albeit in baby steps but feels like a giant leap to me.

Take the good with the bad. Life doesn't leave you any other option. If you never have bad times how can you differentiate from the good?

I'm not worried about the other shoe dropping anymore. It dropped years ago and luckily only have two feet.

It's been a wild and crazy ride ... not one I necessarily want to get on again anytime soon but if had to, know which parts of it to cling on tight and how marvelous it feels to sail back into the station with both arms waving above your head.

I consider myself a waver now instead of a clinger.

Now THAT'S progress!

Til next time...COTTON