And I Thought We Lived in a Nut House

So I'm getting ready for work yesterday morning. I'm sitting at my makeup table which faces the hall upstairs and something catches my eye. The kids bathroom is right outside my bedroom door to the left and there perched on top of the bathroom door was a little bird who flitted away as soon as I got up. I immediately got up, closed the bathroom door and went to wake Zach up. I told Zach there was a bird in his bathroom. From his bed he sleepily said "Let Ziggy  get it."

Ziggy chases birds all day long in  our back yard. He also chases squirrels, rabbits and frogs but birds are his favorite prey. I thought  about it for about two seconds and could just imagine what would happen if I let Ziggy into  the bathroom. He would go berserk, the bird would go berserk and the bathroom would be destroyed in under ten seconds. The shower curtain would be torn down, the shades torn off the window and I'd eventually have feathers and bird guts all over the bathroom.

I vetoed that idea and went back  to Zach's room. I told him he needed to get the bird  because it would crap all over the place. Zach's reply was "Lucky for us it picked the bathroom." I was still wondering how the heck a bird got into  the bathroom on the third floor of our house but more concerned about getting it OUT of the house first.

I'm not a big fan of birds to begin with. Blame  the Hitchcock movie. I like looking at  them in the trees but not really a fan of them fluttering around inside my house. They tend to  freak out and lose their bowels.

I put on my big girl pants, game face, went into the bathroom and closed the door behind me. The little sh*t (huge pun) flew behind the shower curtain, darted  to  the sink and zoomed past my head on its way  back to the door. It hit the closed door and darted to the window and swerved back to the shower. I opened the window,  hurriedly took the screen off, flung it on the floor and made a quick exit  slamming  the door shut with thoughts of  Tippy Hedron in the back of my mind.

I went downstairs to get some orange juice and the kitchen door to our garage stood wide open, leading to the garage with one garage door open as well. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out how the little bird got inside. How it got past  three dogs still amazes me.

I went back upstairs and cautiously opened the bathroom door. No bird! Just some bird poop on the roll of toilet paper. At least it knew what toilet paper was for!

The screws had come loose on  the door knob leading from  the kitchen to the garage and wasn't closing tight, giving our unwelcome visitor, robbers, rapists and mass murderers  free  access to our house.

Guess we got lucky it was just a bird.

Working all weekend, furniture store tomorrow day  and restaurant tomorrow  night. Sunday is Massey's Baccalaureate and working at  the restaurant Sunday night. Finally getting somewhat ahead so all the work I can get is  a blessing. I've been getting a lot more rest having this dual employment and feel  pretty  good.

Massey graduates this coming  Saturday and it blows me away to think my youngest is fixing to  fly  the nest. At least she seems to have better direction than the spawn that invaded my bathroom .

Our house is falling apart, needs lots of work and repairs  but at least we were able to keep it. In four short years it will be paid off and  then can take out a home equity loan, fix it up and sell it for a pretty  nice profit.

Four years ago we were in such a bad state that wondered if we could hang on to it at all.

Thanks to God, family, friends and even strangers we have made it to the promised land. We hung on for forty eight months and in forty eight more months will come full circle.

It's hard being a grown up.

Sometimes I feel like complaining but ultimately always feel ashamed. There are so many millions and millions who are so almost ridiculously less fortunate  than us that I tend to just  feel blessed and keep on keeping on.

"A bird in the hand is worth two in  the bush."

 It's better to have a lesser but certain advantage than the possibility of a greater one that may come to nothing..

Til next time...COTTON

I Am Thankful...

Not really sure how this year has slipped by so quickly. Next  week is December for Pete's sake! Spent Thanksgiving at my sister's house. We had eighteen people and it was a  grand old time. It was a beautiful day so we left the pups out back. We took the rascal., Ziggy with us. He's still a puppy and left to his own devices for any  extended period of time unsupervised usually involves some type of home repair or clean up. Also he hasn't met every one in the family yet so we took the little doofus with us. I think I heard Charlie and Ham both snort a sigh of relief when we put him in the car with us and pulled out of the driveway.

My brother was there...haven't seen him in a while and he most likely prefers it that way. (I'm a needy  sister)  My cousin who we recently re connected with after decades came and  I took the old family photo albums to  share with her...we laughed and cried and had a blast.

Friends of my sister came who were planning on going to a restaurant for Thanksgiving (gag me with a spoon) and all fit in nicely with our crazy bunch!

It was "Eat  Drink and be Merry!"

Sometimes, more often than not I feel ridiculous complaining about the past few years. Yes they were tough, but are in the past and there is no way to change the past. You can only change the future.

My family has survived and in recent times have seem to flourish  thanks to much help, love and hard work.

Never be afraid of working hard. Never be afraid of accepting help when you need it and never be timid about paying  your good fortune FORWARD.

One of my high school friends and blog reader has suggested me for a job opportunity with her company. It's something totally different yet a job I feel I would have a lot to offer.

You never know until you  try. If you never try you will never know.

I am almost fifty three years old and considering changing careers after almost 34 years,   thanks to the confidence my friend has in me and my abilities as a hard and dedicated worker.

I'm already  crazy...so "What the Hey?"

I'm nervous, not making any commitment but willing to try. As Forrest Gump said
"My Mama always said you've got to put the past behind you before you can move on." 

Til next  time...COTTON

You Can't Go Back... So Move Forward

You'll have to be from my generation  to remember this picture. It was bigger  than the "Smiley Face."

One of my husband's favorite sayings is "You can't change  the past." He's usually saying this to me when I am griping about something he didn't do or didn't do exactly the way I wanted him to. He uses it other times too, like when I lament about how well off we used to be compared to the life we've lived past few years.

I know this sounds crazy,  especially coming from me but I think I need to listen to him more often.

I can't change the past few years. The important thing is that we are all still here. The important thing is that we all learned a lesson..."Never take life for granted."

So I lost twenty pounds and gained a lot of gray hair. So I have more wrinkles than a dress shirt crammed into a two liter coke bottle. So what?

I'm still here, and last time I checked that was the important part.

You can't change the past and you can't go back. Guess I'll just inch my way forward...one step at a time.

Don't get me wrong, it was rough. At times almost comical. (see MANY previous posts) I do miss the days when we had perfect credit and could buy anything we needed, within reason. We  took vacations to the beach every year and spoiled our kids rotten every Christmas and birthday.

We have battled back to on time payments. That is progress my friends. Speaking of friends, we would have never made it this far without them. My family has been the best...which consist of my brother and sister. They pulled us through and pushed us onward.

When we hit our low my friends kicked into high gear. I actually have a list of people to pay back and  don't worry, I will.

I gotta get out of this serving gig and into what I love...writing.

I am grateful for what serving tables has done for me but it is time to do something for myself.

My daughter mentioned maybe she should video tape me speaking my blog instead of writing  it and putting it on youtube. It's free and there are a lot of idiots making money off it.

Something to consider...

Til next  time...COTTON

Welcome To MY World Little Missy!

So Massey has started working part time for the restaurant I work for...and she thought OUR family was dysfunctional!

We are a bunch of nuts at work and all a little crazy in our own individual ways, but that's the way I like it. Mixed nuts have always been my favorite.

She's not feeling her best, our furnace has been out for three days and of course she came down with a cold right before the heat went out. On top of that her bedroom is the only one on the ground floor with the garage on the other side of one wall and the front of the house on another...in other words her room is the coldest one in the house. Luckily I bought her a small ceramic space heater last week on a whim for her room and also she is right by the kitchen so I just turn the oven on 200 degrees before I go to bed around 2 and Tim turns it off when he gets up early for work. Heck, I should throw a roast in the oven before I go to bed and dinner would be ready by six in the morning!

She worked with us last night busing tables and I'll have to hand it to her, even feeling like crap she did a great job. She has grown up surrounded by the restaurant world and knows how the system works, knows to ignore the potty mouth she hears from the back and how to behave in the front of the house. One of the hostesses who is eighteen decided to call in and quit over the phone so she got got put on the schedule for this morning as well. I had to close last night and didn't get out til late so Tim picked her up and she came home... fell into bed with another dose of cold medicine and was ready before me this morning for work.

When we got there she asked who the hostess was and I told her "It's YOU."

With brief instructions we opened the doors and "Off she went!"  She did just fine and hung in there til almost four this afternoon when I got off. I took her across the street to Target and bought her some flu medicine, bought her and Zach some sandwiches from Panera and dumped her off at  home and got back to work ten minutes late for my night shift. What amazes me is she did a better job than some of the grown people we have had host for us. She made me proud and has fifty bucks to show for it.

She has the owner Len wrapped around her little finger. I have never seen the big ole bear  as sweet as he is when talking about or to Massey.

Another server, Hoke (my best friend...remember Driving Miss Daisy?) told Massey "Don't get sucked into this restaurant world...it's like a drug, you just can't stop or get out." He is right in a way...look at me! It's a life I chose but a life that has served me well. (small pun) Every shift I work is  pay day, the better I do my job the better the pay check. Not always,  but if you do your best the odds are in your favor. At  the age of fifty "ish" I think of myself more as a writer...a poor writer but still a writer. I have faith in myself that one day it will happen for me and being a server has helped support my family until I can reach my OWN goal... of being discovered, published or both.

Massey will go far in life, I have no doubt. She is driven and hungry (totally a metaphor...I DO feed my kids although we HAVE been through a ton of peanut butter in the past two years and she has only recently learned to drive.)

She will use this job as a vehicle to help her reach her her desired goals and it will be padding along the bumpy way to a successful life.

She's working with a bunch of nuts,  me being one of the biggest ones. I like being a nut, makes life so much more fun!

Another server and I had a group of ten older ladies in a private room today  for their little Christmas get together. They all came,  each in a Christmas sweater or vest..some had both. Of course it was all separate checks. I had the checks printed off but when I went back into the room they had all changed seats to chat with other friends so I just called out what they had ordered wanting them to raise their hand and claim their check.

The first check,  I said "So who had the small Barbarella salad?" They all sat stunned and no one said said anything. I repeated it and they all sat silent and stared at me. Finally the woman in the reindeer vest sat up straight and said "Oh, that was me!"

I said "Thank goodness, I thought maybe I was in the wrong room...it happens to me all the time, that  hamster falls asleep in his little wheel." That got  a chuckle and things went smoothly after that. They were adorable and left us a phat 20% tip.

I  enjoy being in charge of my own destiny. The harder I work, the better service I give... the better my audience seems to appreciate me.

My co worker was right in a way...waiting tables IS like a drug. You need money... you work.  If you need more money you work even more. You work until you have what you need then enjoy the high of your success and want even MORE!

People who don't think being a server is a real job aren't  being real...trust me!

I don't wanna brag but I am a master of my craft and a professional at what I do.  What makes icing on the cake is that I enjoy it and it suits me just fine.

Call me a dealer...I am! I deal out great service in a time when people want the best bank for their buck. When they go out and spend hard earned money...how lucky are they to get not only excellent service but a comedy show for free?

Come see me...I do ten to twelve shows a week!

The beach season has opened in the restaurant world...three weeks where you pack your nuts for the rest of winter. Hopefully my little cheek's will be poppin' and droppin' !!

Come see me for some yummy food and meet the new Hostess Extraordinaire!! Remember, mention my blog and you get a free appetizer or dessert!

Til Next time...COTTON