Number one I've started to grow facial hair...how gross is that? I don't mean an Amish beard, but fuzz has sprouted out of no where with a random curly hair that some wicked witch transplanted to my chin when I wasn't looking.
I'm thinking that weighing a hundred pounds counter acts random one inch hairs..."Yep" that's my theory and I'm sticking to it!
Getting old isn't for the faint hearted...especially if you are a woman.
Number one: If you are a woman with kids you probably work WAY too hard and get WAY too few kudos.
Number two: Somebody give me a menopause manual because I find the rules very hard to follow.
I was okay when the night sweats began...it was like sleeping while working in the yard in late August at noon. I can deal with the heat...I'm a Leo.
It's this gray hair shooting out of my head like fireworks and these monthly, semi monthly twice yearly cycles that are killing me.
For two months I thought I was done..NOTHING!
I almost threw myself a tampon bonfire party. But after a dry spell (so to speak)...it is crazy. After three weeks I wonder if I am becoming anemic? I don't know if this is normal or if I should go to a Doc in the Box?
Sounds weird to put this in my blog, but I tend to put EVERY THING in my blog. Since I have no insurance I thought I would put it out there to the 27,000 hits I've had on my blog...surely to goodness one of you is a doctor (or knows one) that enjoys my writing enough to give me free medical advice...or free tampons. (Super Only)
I blame it all on Adam...the weak little %$@*!&% * ... it was ONE apple, can you NOT live without eating ONE stupid apple? I bet if he hadn't eaten the apple, Men would have had the babies, periods, hot flashes and menopause. So what Eve gave it to him, she was probably tired of cooking. Thanks a lot guys...once again you dump the problem in our lap and of course like the "Fixers" we are we take care of it.
smhs...
I just recently learned what "smhs" means. I thought it was a yiddish type sound like "SCHMUAH!" (kinda like Yadda Yadda). My daughter told me it was a texting thing that meant "Shaking my head slowly."
I say Fo Shizzle, True That and BAM!
Now a lot more FB posts make sense and I feel pretty cool again! (Massey will be "smhs" when she reads this)
Gotta work another double shift on Sunday but with the time change I will be one hour younger...
Til next time...OLD COTTON
1 comment:
Thank you for that hilarious, refreshing post! Not sure how old you are, but I'm 50 and relate to all of it. I have an 8 yr. old son and I wish I had more energy for him! I also have the facial hair and without my tweezers I would be a goner. Just a thought; I had long periods and clotting, turned out to be a polyp in there I had to be surgically removed. I opted to have novasure, an ablation surgery that obliterated my periods. I know you have insurance, but they will take payments! Take care of yourself, and most of all, don't feel guilty about anything! Well, almost anything!! Jenny
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