Sunday, July 31, 2011

Low Key Birthday...But a Good One

It was about a bazillion degrees today so I chose one o'clock to go weed eat the front of the subdivision. I felt my face melting after about four minutes and after fifteen I was down to ninety pounds and covered with grass and dirt...and loving every minute of it! Tomorrow is the first so I wanted to get my paycheck from the HOA  plus there's nothing I love more than working in the sun making progress that looks beautiful when I pull out of my neighborhood saying to myself "That looks good because of ME!"

Johnny is still in the ICU so I guilt-ed Zach with it being my birthday into cutting my neighbor's yard with his push mower. I used to push my yard when we first moved in but once you've ridden Johnny, pushing seems like punishment so I let Zach do it.

I came home from weed eating the front and Zach was down to seventy pounds and flat on his back on the sofa in the living room.

I crashed on the other couch next to him and tried to recover a heartbeat while letting Charlie and Ham lick all the salt and grass off my legs...they acted like I was a banana split and seemed to enjoy it.

I showered and went into work while Massey was attending my birthday party at my sister's house that I had to miss. (I heard it was an awesome party)

I was glad I worked,  a great night and the tipping god's blessed me. I always have a good time at work and sometimes even a hoot of a time...tonight was one of them.

It was my birthday and I was working while the rest of my family was attending my birthday dinner at my sister's house without me so I was entitled to have some fun...right?

One of my favorite co workers was working with me. She's an actress and has been in many well known movies..."The Blind Side" to name one. She is cute as a button and  a nervous wreck the entire time she is clocked in . Maybe she is preparing for her next role as a neurotic server in "Waitress II" but we love her anyway. She always has a funny story and is always in a good mood...MY kind of person to work with!

So at the end of the night she goes to the back to fill the oil and vinegar bottles at the work station where the chefs prep food.

She came back out to the alley way and said "I had a dream about Leon last night and he's standing back there finishing the creme brule' on the prep table and I keep thinking I am going to burst out laughing...can you go back there and do it for me?"  I told her "Sure" and walked to the back area in the kitchen.

Leon is the owner's son and pretty handsome unless you piss him off, which is easy to do. (See above photo)

I walked back to the table and like the good friend I am, said nonchalantly "Sybil had a sexually explicit dream about you and felt funny about being this close to you so I came back here to finish filling these bottles for her." He cocked his head to one side and continued finishing his creme brule'.  He's the silent type , very easy on the eyes unless he is pissed off and unfortunately working in 120 degree heat and having Italian/ French/ German/ Polish parents he is screwed.

I walked back out front and told Sybil everything was taken care of. After I told her what I had said she looked like she was once again going to dissolve into tears...her Forte'.

The bartender out front who has known me for over fourteen years said to Sybil "What were you thinking..how long have you known Kelly?"

Case in point...the bartender is beautiful and Portuguese. She has the biggest hoo- haas I have ever seen and  one time even a little boy who was about three reached up from the table with his mother and grandmother and  honked on one of them  like a bicycle horn. At least we could comfort the mom telling her not to worry about her son's sexual orientation .

This bartender had a table next to mine tonight with a man at it and after he left I went to clear the dishes and took out my pen and wrote on his credit card receipt "GREAT RACK."

I was in the back two minutes later when I heard her yell "KELLY!!"

 I've got to start changing my hand writing, it's very distinctive. One time my buddy Hoke had a table and after they left I wrote on the charge slip "You have a huge booger in your nose." He pegged me on that one too but I have gotten several other servers with my little comments on charge slips.

Barb was harping on us one night about leaving our personal drinks where we shouldn't . They have a shelf in the back where we are all supposed to keep our drink cups. I told Barb we had a new employee drink area and pointed to the booty of another one of my fave peeps to work with. She is an absolute doll and has a boo-tay J-Lo would be jealous of. You could sit a tray of cocktails on it! I wish I had her butt...as Massey would say "It's booty-lish-ush." (Hence the other above photo)

 All these people put up with me, let me do my comedy routine nightly... sometimes two shows a day and even love me!

What more could I possibly want from a job?

Yes it was a good birthday...at least for me!

Til next time...or my matinee show tomorrow

COTTON the Comic

1 comment:

Walter said...

You are one crazy gal! Glad you had a fun B'day, even though you had to work.